Does anyone else feel bleak about their future?

[BleaketyBleak]

I'm chronically ill, and it's hard and is impacting on my fertility. I have a very ill parent.

I'm slowly waking up to the fact that I'll never be free of fear and pain again. Have to learn to live around it.

Can anyone relate? What's going on for you, if so?

Bump because you don’t need to feel alone too

Hi @BleaketyBleak
Just dropping in to say I have felt like this too. My chronic illness flares then dies down. When it is flaring I feel just like you do now. Does yours do the same? I ask because my consultant once said that it’s really important to batten down the hatches and ride it out being gentle with yourself in every way when it is bad. Then things feel better and you can get to sailing again when the storm has passed.

Hope you feel better soon. Be kind to yourself

Handhold from me OP. Sounds like you are facing a lot of challenges at the moment

I can empathise, 10 years ago I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, after a very acute inflammatory episode. It took me 6 months to accept that I had MS. The life I knew changed and the future was too scary to contemplate. It was a really bleak point in my life. I felt guilty for letting my family down, sounds stupid I know but my condition affects them to.

I cope by making adjustments, and not looking too far into the future, I just take one day at a time.

Is there treatment for your condition OP? Or a Specialist Nurse that you can support you? My MS Nurse was so helpful to me.

Wishing you all the best

Thank you for your replies it's actually really helpful to read where other people have felt fearful for the future but are somehow still doing ok.

Oh god I feel if I start crying I won't stop. I want a child so badly, and just don't think it will happen for me. And if I did manage it, I want my parent to be around to meet them.

I feel either horribly numb, or like crying, for the last two days. How do I fix everything and accept things for what they are? I've wanted to be a mother since my teens.

Yes, I am very bleak at the moment. I'm not a crier generally but I am fed up

My problems are not in comparison to yours. You have my sympathies

I am SICK of being resilient of keeping going of waiting to catch a break. I do believe in Karma. Not in a spiritual sense but that my humanity will show to like minded people and the people who have bad intentions will eventually fall from their own undoing

Anyway life just keeps shitting on me. And I'm a single parent so I have no choice but to be resilient. No one to pick me up if I have a breakdown. I love my mum but she is a burden and never really became a fully functioning adult. My dad passed away when I was 23 so I keep an eye on her. She had breast cancer when I was 24 (life's been worse for her) I had a miscarriage at 25 my first pregnancy. I had my baby at 26 which was wonderful. Before her 1st birthday my husband had cheated on me and left me. Before my first Mother's Day and first birthday as a parents and her first birthday. 27 we sold our house and I moved back with my mum as a single parent.
Took me 5 years to get my self sorted to my own place. I stupidly got pregnant on a one night stand (2 years after ex and my first sex since him) decided to have an abortion which was an ordeal.
Dated an narcissist luckily got out
Dated a wonderful man who I thought was it. All going great all headed in the right direction at a sensible pace. After a year and a half his mental health is a factor and he said he's rushed into a relationship after his divorce and we break up. 2 weeks ago

This week DD's dad has told me he is moving 200 miles away. To a job that is live on site holiday work (no weekends off)
It took me YEARS to support him into regular contact with DD last year was 62 overnights the most ever 🙄

Now that's going to be 0

I don't know how I will cope. But I have to. Where's my breakdown, when do I say, MY MENTAL HEALTH

Never because my daughter needs me to be better than that she didn't ask to come into this shit show of a world

Russia, energy, food and fuel bills, climate change, housing costs and a shit government uk. Is just about pushing me over the edge!

Work is ok but underpaid

I have fantastic friends and my mum and daughter (who's bloody hard work)

Phew! Got that off my chest
Oh and the monotony of laundry, housework, food shop

Yes I feel you.
Autoimmune conditions, long term unemployed, living somewhere I don’t want to, no chance of packing up and moving, also ‘broke’ my shoulder a year ago and am in constant pain, have lost full range of movement.

I keep going for the kids. I’m trying to get in routine of walking to get outside every day. Today I saw my favourite sight in our very suburban area, the neighbour who drives his English sheepdog around every day in the golf cart. He also gets a walk later on.

Yerp.

I have ADHD, that’s not going away.
I have CPTSD, that’s not going away.

I’ve had long Covid for a year now, I’m starting to think that’s not going away - and as a previously physically healthy 30 something, it’s fucking horrible.

I’m single with 3DC - I’m not arsed about a partner, but for example, I’m moving house next month, have nobody to help.

My Grandparents are pushing 80 and when they’re gone, that’s it, no other family.

Don’t get me started on money.