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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Ignoring my messages

2 replies

strawberrycream45 · 13/02/2022 18:34

I feel like I'm being overly sensitive but thought I'd get some opinions...

I'll call my friend Jess for this.

Jess and I have been friends over 10 years, very very close. Over the last few months I've noticed she's started changing, in the sense that everything is very her and very one sided. I'm always reaching out, asking how she is, showing enthusiasm for her life (she's getting married early next year and has recently had a promotion, and a few months ago a large inheritance). She rarely does the same for me, in fact when she asks how I am it's usually as we're ending the phone conversation.

Anyway, I've noticed that she ignores my messages on WhatsApp. I'll message her and then say, 4 hours later I'll see she's online and hasn't read it. I'll go back again a few hours later and she's been online and still not read it. She usually replies to me the day after, and it's usually nothing about what I've messaged or a quick blunt reply and then moving onto something about her.

AIBU, or more likely ridiculous, to think she is just ignoring me - either because she doesn't want to engage with me at the time or has other people she'd rather talk to. Or does she go onto WhatsApp and literally not see my message.

I'm just feeling a bit run down from it all. Like I'm talking to a brick wall after years of being very close. I'm fully prepared to be told I'm being ridiculous!

OP posts:
Totalwasteofpaper · 13/02/2022 18:39

I think some people are like this... but if it's a change in how she's communicating
Ie she wasn't like this previously
then yeah I'd say it's a bit of a sign

SheWolfOFFrancee · 13/02/2022 18:43

I’m sorry OP it really hurts when a good friend starts to treat you like that

If it’s a change in how you’ve always communicated (so previously she’s ready and respond fairly quickly) then I would take it as a sign. You can either tackle it head on and ask if she has a problem or is something wrong or you can just take a step back for a bit and see what she does. If she doesn’t try to contact you you’ll have your answer.

Friendship and people change over time and sometimes we grow out or apart from even our oldest friends but that doesn’t stop it hurting when you’re living it

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