Is this misogyny or am I just uptight

[Madamesosostris]

I was in a branch of Size? looking for trainers for myself. A song was playing (loudly) and the lyrics (sung by a man) were 'I've been fucking super models since I was 19.' There were numerous other references to who he'd been fucking blasting out and in the end I just walked out.

Am I a humourless, uptight feminist or is this type of thing part of slow drip misogyny that we just excuse and put up with?

I’ve notice a double standard where it’s more upsetting when it’s rap yet rock has been misogynistic since before rap was even a genre and gets a pass.

This!!!

Rock and many others types of music is way more misogynistic than rap but it’s always rap that seems to get the bad press constantly.

@RobotValkyrie

That song (regardless of its potential artistic merit) would never be played on radio or TV uncensored (till after the watershed), therefore it doesn't belong in a shop during "normal office hours" either.

It is creating a hostile environment (akin to sexual harassment) towards a number of protected groups (religious people, women, children, ...). Playing it in a commercial premise open to the public (which is, by law, required to offer equal access to its services to the whole community) is very probably in breach of the Equality Act. The loud volume is also disability discrimination, by the way (for people with sensory issues). Service providers (including shops) are bound by law to make reasonable adjustments to make their services accessible to all potential users. Since playing lewd songs at loud volume is NOT their core business, they are on very shaky ground from a legal perspective, if anyone (customer or employee) with a relevant protected characteristic was to complain about being discriminated against personally by their policy.

Breach of the equality act for saying fuck?

I wouldn't want my kids listening to it but I can't say the misogyny angle strikes much of a chord. Most singers are singing about sex, both male & female.
Some of the songs on R1 are more bleep than song these day!

YABU to think that music has a ‘slow drip’ of misogyny. It’s been overt since time immemorial.

YANBU to not want to listen to it.

@AmandaHoldensLips

This happened to me recently in a shop that sold sneakers and stuff. I decided to try not to look deeply shocked. To my horror I then tried to do some small rap-based dance moves in an effort to appear down with the kids

I'm 58

Properly made me laugh, can relate.

Tell you what, Op, I would have walked out too, riles me to be subjected to that sort of crap.

I don't think it's intrinsically sexist from that line (I don't know the song.)

However, while I can be very sweary but I don't necessarily want to hear it when I'm shopping on my lunch hour, so I get that.

I don’t think saying you’ve shagged a lot of people is misogynistic.

In general a song with explicit lyrics is an odd choice for a high street shop to play, though. I used to work in a pub and we had to have a censored playlist for daytimes when people were coming in for meals and so on. Then the uncensored one kicked in at 7pm.

@TrickorTreacle

I couldn't get worked up by this tbh.

Offensive lyrics in pop music shocker.

You say this as if it is hard to avoid offensive language in pop music. Well “shocker” it really isn’t and it is even easier for a store to avoid playing songs with offensive lyrics.

@warmeduppizza

That would really put me off, I’d take my business elsewhere.

This.

I certainly don't want to be listening to such rubbish.

@lololololollll

I have Spotify on in my restaurant and it just plays stuff that it thinks I like. Quite often it plays stuff like that and I have to run and turn it off. Maybe they didn't do on purpose

You know they mark tracks with "E" for "explicit content"? Can you not filter them out? I'd be annoyed if I was in there especially with kids and loads of swearing and misogyny came on.

There’s a setting on Spotify to block songs with explicit content.

@phoenixrosehere

I've had a weird double standard in my head for years - and I think I'm not alone -- that its somehow OK if its rap because that's the genre, but its really not OK fundamentally.

I’ve notice a double standard where it’s more upsetting when it’s rap yet rock has been misogynistic since before rap was even a genre and gets a pass. I love rock and I like some rap, but rock music has always gotten a MAJOR pass.

That's a totally fair point tbh.

Rock music tends to be more euphemistic than rap (when talking about sex). It's tended to be "fast machines" and other hackneyed cliches rather than explicitly saying "I fucked her" etc. But rock is certainly just as misogynist if not more so.

@RobotValkyrie

That song (regardless of its potential artistic merit) would never be played on radio or TV uncensored (till after the watershed), therefore it doesn't belong in a shop during "normal office hours" either.

It is creating a hostile environment (akin to sexual harassment) towards a number of protected groups (religious people, women, children, ...). Playing it in a commercial premise open to the public (which is, by law, required to offer equal access to its services to the whole community) is very probably in breach of the Equality Act. The loud volume is also disability discrimination, by the way (for people with sensory issues). Service providers (including shops) are bound by law to make reasonable adjustments to make their services accessible to all potential users. Since playing lewd songs at loud volume is NOT their core business, they are on very shaky ground from a legal perspective, if anyone (customer or employee) with a relevant protected characteristic was to complain about being discriminated against personally by their policy.

Would love to see someone take this to court

Anyway back in the real world...
There’s far worse songs OP, I’d let this one go for your own sake...
If you feel strongly about it just don’t shop there again

I'd have left the shop too.

because Rap music is total shite and I have listening to it

No shop should be playing music with explicit lyrics.

No need to take it to court. Just have a word with the manager. If you don't like what you hear and it's a chain go over their heads. I did it at my gym about music videos and the female manager agreed. It gave her the authority to go to her parent company and say the videos were putting off female customers.

Yes its misogynistic crap - shop somewhere else.

@RobotValkyrie

That song (regardless of its potential artistic merit) would never be played on radio or TV uncensored (till after the watershed), therefore it doesn't belong in a shop during "normal office hours" either.

It is creating a hostile environment (akin to sexual harassment) towards a number of protected groups (religious people, women, children, ...). Playing it in a commercial premise open to the public (which is, by law, required to offer equal access to its services to the whole community) is very probably in breach of the Equality Act. The loud volume is also disability discrimination, by the way (for people with sensory issues). Service providers (including shops) are bound by law to make reasonable adjustments to make their services accessible to all potential users. Since playing lewd songs at loud volume is NOT their core business, they are on very shaky ground from a legal perspective, if anyone (customer or employee) with a relevant protected characteristic was to complain about being discriminated against personally by their policy.

This is a great post. I agree with every word, and wish I could organize my thoughts in this way.

I don't know the song and don't mind swearing or have DC so may not have noticed the lyrics.
But I really wish all shops not aimed at teenagers would just tone everything down.
When I first went into a Forever 21 years ago I lasted about 5 minutes because it was so bright and loud it raised my stress levels.
It feels like a lot of shops have followed that model now, I don't understand it.
I can't be alone in finding it uncomfortable surely it lessens spend from browsers?