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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

School charging for swimming in key stage 2

86 replies

narcdad · 10/02/2022 12:39

My dd is autistic and I paid for private swimming lessons (not one to one but group sessions) for 2 years. It was awful, she hated it and at the time I didn't know she had asd as was not diagnosed so just assumed she didn't like it. I stopped after the 2 years as she manage the basics to keep herself safe in the water.

School are asking for £20 towards the cost of swimming lessons, which I believe is a mandatory part of the curriculum. Those on FSM / benefits do not have to pay. I don't want to pay, my dd doesn't want to go, would I be unreasonable to not pay it?

I've also got to find £430 for the yr6 trip in September (again those on FSM / benefits do not have to pay).

As a working family it's really difficult financially and along with the fact my dd will most likely not go swimming with the school I feel I shouldn't pay.

OP posts:

Hospedia · 10/02/2022 12:53

Is there any other provision available during swimming lessons? I'd ask school avoid alternatives and frame it as a reasonable adjustment with relation to her having a disability. Swimming can be a huge sensory strain for some autistic people - changing clothes, tight swimsuit, loud/chilly/echoing changing rooms (made ten times worse by there being multiple people in it at the same time), then the water which could be hot or cold, it tends ti be noisy in the pool room too, splashing, then getting out so yet another transition to deal with, feeling wet and chilly, showers, get dried, get dressed.

It's a lot to deal with. I would ask if there is another PE class she can join that isn't doing PE, for example if there is another class in her year group not doing swimming if its done on rotation? One of my DC can't do trampolining due to hypermobility so when it's their class' turn for trampolining, they go with the other Year 8 class instead who are doing football/tennis/circuit training, etc.

For the school trip, they're not compulsory. You can say she isn't going and school will have to make provision for her to be taught for those days. One of my DC is autistic and won't sleep anywhere except at home in their own bed so they don't go on residential.

Hospedia · 10/02/2022 12:54

That should say another PE class that isn't doing swimming

MyCatEatsPrawnCrackers · 10/02/2022 12:56

There is absolutely no way you should be paying towards swimming lessons in school. That's outrageous!

JellyCatBat · 10/02/2022 12:56

Can you speak to the Senco to find out what options there are for her as they should be able to make adjustments.
If she was to try swimming again I’d imagine that a calm quiet SEN session or with family in a small pool would be more appropriate so I see where you are coming from.
I think I’d resent paying for something my daughter wouldn’t do especially as it is more expensive to have a child with additional needs anyway.

CommonMelodies · 10/02/2022 12:57

YANB, your dd is autistic and has special needs. If she didn't cope well with private swimming lesson school ones will only be worse for her as less on-to-one support. Your dd's school is surely aware and will have to accommodate her not taking part.

for any child that is taking part it's of expected to pay towards it. Families and schools work in partnership, unless it's due to financial hardship, these are the costs one expects when raising a child.

CommonMelodies · 10/02/2022 12:57

YANBU

ChicCroissant · 10/02/2022 12:59

Is it to cover the cost of transport? My DD's school did that, yes they are supposed to have swimming lessons but if the school need to hire coaches every week to do that then it's hard for them to find the funds to do that.

Masterchief507 · 10/02/2022 12:59

Tell them you're not paying and she's not going. Ask them what they are going to do about that.

NeedToDiet · 10/02/2022 12:59

The suggestion that your daughter joins another PE lesson wouldn't work in many schools as other clases may not be doing PE at the same time as the swimming lessons

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 10/02/2022 13:00

I'm guessing the £20 is to cover transport?

Ask what provision the school has if you don't give permission.

PineappleWilson · 10/02/2022 13:00

At our primary, the cost was to cover coach hire, not the swimming element. I can understand your concern, but would you pull her out of another element of the curriculum because she struggled with it? I'd contact the school and explain what you've explained here and see what they can offer to support your DD to attend as part of the class.

Starlightstarbright1 · 10/02/2022 13:01

Is this for transport. Our primary walked to swim lessons but it was next door to the school but was free?

I would talk to Senco about your Dd.

Crabjuice · 10/02/2022 13:02

YANBU at all for the reasons why your daughter should not go, and also to discuss your individual circumstances as to not pay with the school directly.

I do actually think YABU for the FSM/Benefits comments though which are completely unnecessary.

Acheyknees · 10/02/2022 13:02

Is the cost for transport rather than swimming?

Dahlietta · 10/02/2022 13:07

Have you actually told them that you don't want her to go swimming? If she isn't going to go, then obviously you shouldn't have to pay, but unless I have missed something, you've jumped a few steps and gone straight to outraged.

Sirzy · 10/02/2022 13:08

The cost will be for transport.

If your worried about how she will cope in the lessons then talk to the SENCO and discuss how it will work or what alternative they have. Ds couldn’t do swimming with school so stayed and did work with his 1-1.

If your worried about affording the transport then talk to school and explain that.

Doveyouknow · 10/02/2022 13:12

My ds had asd and struggled with swimming lessons at the local leisure centre even though they were small group lessons. So I didn't think he would do particularly well in school ones. Turns out he has loved it and his swimming has come on loads. I think it's worth talking to the school about the lessons and what might work for your dd before making any decisions on paying.

Original poster

narcdad · 10/02/2022 13:12

Thanks for all the replies, the transport is paid by the school, the £20 contribution is for the swim lessons.

I have emailed the school and asked if an alternative provision could be sorted out, my dd does go swimming with us 2x a month in Sen sessions, she struggles highly with anxiety and needs help getting changed, she also has waist length hair which takes a lot of assistance when changing.

She wants to go residential (at the moment) so o am happy to pay, although if she does change her mind I realise the money is not refundable, a chance I'm willing to take.
I know she'll flat out refuse swimming at school.

OP posts:

FancySusan · 10/02/2022 13:14

I agree that it will be for the bus. Schools are financially strapped. The money has to come from somewhere.

Last year we cancelled our outdoor adventure day as three parents didn't pay and we didn't have the class budget (£120 a year) to cover them so the whole thing had to be cancelled.

Original poster

narcdad · 10/02/2022 13:15

@Dahlietta I am certainly not "outraged" I just want to know if I am being unreasonable for not wanting to pay for an activity my dd is very unlikely to attend.

OP posts:

FancySusan · 10/02/2022 13:16

Cross posted with you about the bus. I think it's really strange if they are asking for a contribution towards the lessons themselves.

Even without the £20 issue if you think she is going to find the lessons difficult I would have no qualms whatsoever about not giving permission.

Original poster

narcdad · 10/02/2022 13:18

In order to keep costs as low as possible you will pay only for the lessons as the school will be funding the cost of the coach. Therefore, we are asking for a contribution of £18.50. If you are in receipt of benefit related free school meals please contact the school regarding swimming lessons.

The above is what the letter says in relation to cost, it is not transport.

OP posts:

Clymene · 10/02/2022 13:18

If she isn't able to cope with swimming lessons, I really wouldn't spend over £400 on a residential trip, especially as you're struggling financially.

Original poster

narcdad · 10/02/2022 13:23

@Clymene

If she isn't able to cope with swimming lessons, I really wouldn't spend over £400 on a residential trip, especially as you're struggling financially.

The residential trip does not include swimming, we have also put provisions in place so that she will be able to attend, most importantly she WANTS to go. She doesn't want to go swimming though (with the school)

OP posts:

Mushypeasandchipstogo · 10/02/2022 13:28

We had to pay approximately £30 for our son’s school swimming lessons and that was about 10 years ago. I am almost certain that at that stage it was a compulsory part of the curriculum. He also swam at that time with a club where several of the children had been diagnosed with ASD and ADHD but they were excellent swimmers!

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