To just leave with no job to go to?

[Mxflamingnoravera]

I hate my job. In the past year it has become untenable. I reduced my hours because of caring responsibilities and was going to delegate out my 20% to a colleague who wanted to develop and had the capacity. But she got a new job and I recruited a replacement, she withdrew the day before she was due to start. Now my organisation has a recruitment freeze on and so I am doing both jobs for 80% of my previous pay. I cannot cope. My manager is new and I'm having to coach her and her manager is leaving next week leaving me as the only person left who understands my area of work in the organisation.
I've burst into tears on opening my laptop twice this week. I cannot go on like this.
I just want to walk away from it all. I have no rights as I've only been in post for 18 months.
I have no mortgage and savings that I could live on for a year if I had to. I cannot carry on like this, it's making me I'll.
AIBU to just leave, no notice, just go?

I wouldn’t leave with no notice, in case of a poor reference (although I know what’s said in a reference is usually minimal).

If you’re too unwell to work - and you might be - then go sick, then given notice.

But personally I’d work my notice if I could - and during that time only work my paid 80% hours.

I’d also stop “coaching” your manager. That is not your role; unless we have a different understanding of coaching? If they need training - not unreasonable even for a superior when new - then do that, but in your 80%.

I would call in sick for a few weeks. Don't ever leave a job at the height of stress as it's possible, with some space, you may regret it.

Get a sick note tomorrow.

Ping a few CVs off and speak to your manager. Tell them what you've told us. That you don't think it's fair or sustainable for you to do two people's jobs, especially on a part time salary.

That you are struggling with your mental health and would like a plan in place on how they will better support you.

Good luck. You have rights, don't leave just yet. But definitely take some time out to rebalance 💐

I would put my notice in straight away. You can't go on like this and you say you can survive for a bit....certainly long enough to find a better job.

Once you've handed your notice in, I'd go off sick. If you can get a doctor's letter because of the stress, all the better but if not, you can self-certify for 7 days for a start. You hardly need to worry about messing them about, what's the worse they will do? Sack you? You're leaving anyway.

It's very doubtful they would give you a poor reference, normally they only need to confirm you worked there for X time etc. for your next job.

I was in your position before Christmas although I’ve been at the organisation for 15 years. Things got no better and I ended up at the doctor 2 weeks ago and have been signed off. Mine is also entirely work related.

Go speak to your gp I’m sure they will sign you off in this situation and take that time to reassess and build some resilience. Also do things that bring you joy. It’s really really helped me.

I've told my boss what I told you and she made soothing noises but then spilled out how awful her position is because she's been left high and dry by her predecessor (and she is only an interim).

I've talked to the union since posting this and their rep says they will go to HR director, that the org is not looking after their duty of care for my well-being. I just have to say yes and they'll move on it.

I was off sick last week with a kidney infection, I'm clearly totally run down by it all.

Thanks for suggestion of giving notice and going sick, it would give me breathing space to find something. I'm an ex senior leader in FE and took this job because I did not want to go back into the stress of another Senior post, but I'm being pushed to my limits now in a middle management role. It's just awful.

@GettingThemFromHereToThere

I would call in sick for a few weeks. Don't ever leave a job at the height of stress as it's possible, with some space, you may regret it.

Get a sick note tomorrow.

Ping a few CVs off and speak to your manager. Tell them what you've told us. That you don't think it's fair or sustainable for you to do two people's jobs, especially on a part time salary.

That you are struggling with your mental health and would like a plan in place on how they will better support you.

Good luck. You have rights, don't leave just yet. But definitely take some time out to rebalance 💐

I agree with all of this. It doesn't sound as if you are in a good place to make a decision at the moment and that you are suffering burnout. So give yourself some space to consider the best way forward.

Your employer has a duty of care towards you. Do they have a wellbeing policy which defines their commitment to this? Have you previously made your manager aware of how you are struggling?

I would definitely discuss this with her before making any decisions, and give them an opportunity to put things right. It sounds as if you could be fairly indispensable if you are the only person who understands the work, so you may be surprised how far they will go to improve things for you. If they have any sense they won't want to lose you!

@FrankRattlesnake

I was in your position before Christmas although I’ve been at the organisation for 15 years. Things got no better and I ended up at the doctor 2 weeks ago and have been signed off. Mine is also entirely work related.

Go speak to your gp I’m sure they will sign you off in this situation and take that time to reassess and build some resilience. Also do things that bring you joy. It’s really really helped me.

I would go this, I have also recently had to do this, sometimes you have to take action to provoke change

Thanks all. I'll get an appt with the GP. As my breathing space.

I’d get a sick note for a fortnight and keep talking to the union rep.

I’d give them a chance to put it right but if I returned from sick leave to more of the same, I would resign and work my notice (just the hours I was being paid for, of course).

This sort of scenario is what rainy day savings are for.

Thanks for the "don't leave at the height of stress" advice, I need to work out an exit route that works for me. I'm on three months notice which makes working my notice v unattractive but I can hang on a for few days while I work with the union and perhaps my GP for a way out while I look for something else.

I'm working from home still, thank good ness, so no one sees the tears of frustration. I've never worked on site as I started during lockdown 2020,

So today I sent a letter to the HR director and copied in the union. Waiting to hear what solutions he proposes.

Update, I've been summoned to a meeting on monday to discuss my role. I'm pretty sure it's to tell me I'm leaving (under two years service so no redundancy rights). I'm on three months notice, can I ask for gardening leave or wages in lieu? If I'm not needed in June, then I'm not needed now.

Hope it goes ok. Your contract might cover what to expect with regards to gardening leave or payment in lieu. But ask for what you want.
I personally think that you’re a key person holding your debit together and would give you a pay rise and promotion! But I’d definitely resign and find something else. Even working 3 months notice might reduce stress as you know you’re leaving.

@Mxflamingnoravera

Update, I've been summoned to a meeting on monday to discuss my role. I'm pretty sure it's to tell me I'm leaving (under two years service so no redundancy rights). I'm on three months notice, can I ask for gardening leave or wages in lieu? If I'm not needed in June, then I'm not needed now.

Yes.

You can get PILON (Payment en lieu of Notice)

But it has to be negotiated. Your union rep can help there.

You can ask for gardening leave but it’s unlikely you’ll get it. I’d still then consider sick absence until your mental health improves and then reducing your working hours (and if that means not getting stuff done so be it!)

Why would it be unlikely to get Gardening leave or PILON? They will argue that my role is redundant so why force me to keep working when it's unlikely that I'll be productive? I'll ask for it on the grounds that at my age (60) finding a new job at my level is not going to be easy and it's going to be a full time job just looking and applying.

If I'm gone, they can implement their changes sooner and my team can prepare for the busiest time of the year (July and late June) with a manager who can support them (ie not me).

Obviously I'm not going to say, if I don't get GL or PILON I'm going to down tools, but thats pretty much what will happen, they must know that?

Can you get gardening leave if you've been there less than two years?

Can you have a union rep at the meeting? You just need to manage this so it suits you best.

Call the union now - ask them if you have the right to a rep. Or if not, get them to talk through the options with you.

The first rule of negotiation is don’t let other people set the timetable. Chat to the union rep, but I would push it off for a couple of days or a week so you can prepare and/or the union can attend. A fast meeting says to me they can trying to pull one over on you. Go sick for a few days if necs - a kidney infection can pop up any time -

They'll probably put you on garden leave - especially if you kick up a fuss, which I would recommend doing!

I've spoken to the union rep, he says that because the subject other than "discuss the role of (name of role)" is not known he isn't able to accompany me.

My organisation is well known for sneaky one at a time redundancies without consultation. They won't change the day of the meeting, I think it's shit to hold such a meeting on a Monday and expect me to trot off back to my work for the rest of the week.

I don't think there is any requirement to have been in post for any minimum time to get gardening leave. Personally I'd rather have PILON and walk away with my head high and nose in the air.

Ok, well in that case discuss with him how to handle the meeting. Basically you want to find out what they want, and then end the meeting with a plan to return - do not agree to anything in the room.

So get him to help you plan how to do that.

yes leave being unhappy is not what you need. so take youself out of a negative situation. mental health is the key part of life. walk, crawl sink or swim, life will always throw lemons, thats my motto anyway, walk threw the mud it just teaches you resilience and how to be stronger.

@AllOfUsAreDead

Can you get gardening leave if you've been there less than two years?

I got garden leave after only 9 months in a position.

I should probably have mentioned that I'm in a much better state of mind than when I posted my original first post. I had, at the time unknown to me, a kidney infection which recurred a week later. It really affected my resilience at the time. Once I recovered I got in touch with a mental health line and realised that my low mood was entirely situational and decided that I would carry on in my job and what I couldn't get done would just not get done. My mojo returned and I have been powering through stuff until this bombshell. If they serve me notice now, I'll leave just two weeks short of my two years service so I'm pretty sure thats why it has come now.

Good.

But get anything out of them - cash, extended leave - you can. So agree to nothing in the room. Nose in the air plus wedge of cash in hand is better than just the former.