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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To not want presents from DH's family?

31 replies

MoneyWorries122456 · 09/02/2022 12:28

So my partner is a complete psychopath and when angry with me throws me out the front door where I fall onto the step. I have banged my head once, cut my foot and received grazes and bruises etc. I often call his family after this has happened, as they are the only people who would be able to talk some sense into him. It's that or the police - and the latter cause problems. He cares what his family thinks. However, the response from them has been appalling. "What can we do about it?" And absolutely no sympathy. They've have blocked me as they simply don't want to hear what their psychopath son is doing. However they do wish to send me Xmas presents which I find absolutely insulting when all I want for them to do is care about what is happening to me and intervene. For me, I feel so alone. I hear from him that they are saying that I deserve it and his behaviour is reasonable. It's so hard to talk about it with anyone as bringing in any kind of outside help is not a possibility.

OP posts:
FlissMumsnet · 09/02/2022 16:03

We're just bobbing on here to say that we're so sorry to hear you're going through this MoneyWorries122456
We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged to us we like to link to our web-guides, which we hope may be helpful. If you'd like to, please do feel free to take a look at our [[https://www.mumsnet.com/webguide/domestic-violence Domestic
Violence]] page.
Very best wishes from all at MNHQ
Flowers

countrygirl99 · 09/02/2022 17:24

Stick with him and you are very likely to lose your children anyway. Or they will lose you.

Stressedout1009 · 09/02/2022 17:41

"What can we do about it?"

What can they do if you are still there tolerating it ?

DDivaStar · 09/02/2022 17:47

The problem isn't the presents, get awsy from him asap.

Stompythedinosaur · 09/02/2022 17:53

Ringing his family seems an unusual choice - of course they aren't likely to support you! They will likely share the values he has that have led him to behave so abusively.

You need to leave, and ring people who care about you to support you. And call the police when he harms you. Ignore his threats about getting your dc taken away, this is just gaslighting bullshit!

Women's aid may be helpful to contact.

WorriedGiraffe · 09/02/2022 18:00

If you reported him to the police then he wouldn’t be able to take your children away, instead you are making your children live in this dangerous and damaging environment and risking your own life. You need a wake up call OP, forget sulking about your in laws buying you presents, contact the police, and womens aid, and get yourself and your children to safety.

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