Little Matchstick Girl

[AutomaticMoon]

AIBU to think children of age 5-6 shouldn’t be exposed to this story? I just realised that I think this is when my life long depression started (2 attempts on my own life), it’s too disturbing and traumatic for small children to know this is the world we live in.

I’ve only seen the Disney and I cried.

Must have been in my mid 30s.....

*This really hit me in the guts.

I’m not crying, you’re crying! 😭

Are you a psychologist or something like that? I think I really do identify with the little girl. Still! After living with my grandparents I had to be in foster care and let’s just say the time with my grandparents was paradise, in comparison.*

Not a psychologist but I work with children affected by trauma.
I'm so sorry you had difficult experiences as a child.
I think fairy tales, the real versions are often incredibly dark for just this reason. They're stories originally designed to give children a context to explore those feelings in, but in a safe way.
I hope you're getting the IRL support you need now?

It's an extraordinarily sad story. I'm afraid I couldn't read that one, or the one about the sparrow and the statue, or the one about the grumpy old man and the garden, out loud to the children without crying.

And I'm not a particularly sentimental or empathetic person.

As a child I had this most beautifully illustrated fairy tale book which had many stories in it and The Little Match Girl was my favourite. I loved the pictures I think and although I felt bad for her I too thought she had magically went to live with her lovely gran and don't think I realised she had died.
I still have this book and read this story to my son a few years ago, it was so sad I cried and couldn't read to the end. Still love it though.

I had a book with the most beautiful illustrations of this story but it always broke my heart as did The Little Mermaid, The Ugly Duckling, The Snow Queen and The red shoes (omg she had her feet chopped off to stop dancing then lived in the church for the rest of her life!) And many, many more. I have suffered depression throughout life too although I'm NT and had no particular trauma. I think some children are more prone to being affected by stories as they empathise with the characters. My first trip to the cinema age 5 was the old Snow White and I can still remember going to nans after and my aunt saying did I enjoy it and me bursting into tears even though I'd seen the happy ending, it was the first real dramatisation I'd been exposed to and was all a bit overwhelming.

I was an early reader and don't remember these stories ever being read to me, I read them to myself and maybe I was too young when I did as you felt you were too op. I never talked about my worries to my parents though. I always asked my children how they felt about books we read but they never seemed particularly bothered, they still roll their eyes at me for getting teary at certain stories even now!

AutomaticMoon

I wonder if it was the illustrations in the particular book I read. She had very clearly died at the end!

I was diagnosed with ASD (atypical) last year.

My childhood was… stable but chaotic? In that we all lived in the same slightly-too-small house with our parents until adulthood, went to same primary and secondary schools throughout. But there was a lot of stress, Dad was alcoholic and could be really nasty, there was a lot of strife between him and Mum.

My brothers weren’t very nice either. I never quite understood the “point” of my existence.

Bright enough, but massively lacking in motivation, I really struggled with school, and couldn’t really cope with any job I had (haven’t worked in quite a long time now, I just need peace!).

Overemotional, overthinking, overexplainer. That’s me! 🤓

I’m really sorry you’ve had such a rotten time. ☹️

I agree. Its horrible. No need to expose children to this kind of thing.

I think that if you are more prone to anxiety and depression it’s going to happen as a kid too? Or childhood trauma is reflected back at you. This is one of the stories that have stayed with me. Off the top of my head these are some of the worst:

Little Matchstick Girl - dying in the snow
A Little Princess - parental death, poverty
Goodnight Mister Tom - horrific abuse

It was one of my favourite stories as a child, even though it made me cry. As a teen I loved the song "Artificial Flowers" by The Beautiful South.

I have a long history of depression and anxiety as an adult but I don't think it has a link to linking sad stories.