To travel home at a time it suits me or to attend a wedding?

[Hop27]

Daily Fail do not post this, do your jobs properly and write your own rubbish!
I live overseas and have done for 10 + years, have always had a good routine coming home to visit family & friends every 2nd year and my parents would come to 'summer' with us every 12 to 18 months. Obviously covid put a stop to that and I miss my family terribly.
I was due to be in the wedding party for my oldest friend, but that was obviously cancelled. It's now rebooked for this summer (my winter), which will now be very hard for us as a family to go to because it's not during school holidays.
Our borders are due to open to tourists, my parents are starting to look at flight but are understandably nervous about a 24 hour flight post covid. They would feel more comfortable if someone they knew had taken the trip, a Guinea pig if you like! So they knew what they were getting themselves in for. So they have offered to fly me home, bonus we all get to see each other and they could then fly to me in Spring with less anxiety. I would only be able to come home for a week, with work commitments and running the risk of catching covid and having to stay an extra week.
Now here comes the problem.
Do I come home at a time that suits me and my parents OR do I come home for the wedding? If I came for the wedding I'd 'lose' 3 days because the wedding isn't local. I don't want to upset my oldest friend but I really, really just need to hug my mum.
HELP!!!

come when it suits you.

I don’t understand why you can’t go to the wedding and see your mum as well?

Go for the hug. Your friend loves you and will absolutely understand.

Hug!!!!

My parents travelled to Melbourne a couple of weeks ago and didn't catch COVID if that helps :-)

@dammit88
I can do both, but it would mean I'd need I'd have less time with my parents and I'd need to wait 5 months.. .I could fly home in April, which is my next achievable gap with work.
Also it would limit what I could do with my parents, not travel to see other family etc

Do you have a plus one invite for the wedding?
Could your parents have a few days away near wedding destination?

Personally I’d go to the friends wedding if you don’t plan on coming home again for a year or two after this. I don’t think there’s a right or wrong answer here though.

If I was your friend I’d understand and have no hard feelings if you couldn’t come to my wedding. On the other hand personally I would want to be at my oldest friends wedding especially if I hadn’t seen them for 2 years and could also get a few days with parents. Can your Mum not come with you and stay close to the venue so you get to spend the day before and after the wedding together?

Covid has made everything different. Travel when it suits you and say whatever you need to say to placate your friend (if she's the sort that needs placating).

Why can’t you come home on both occasions? Sorry, maybe I’m missing something.

@Burnamer

Why can’t you come home on both occasions? Sorry, maybe I’m missing something.

If it's winter there when it's summer here and it takes 24 hours to get there and the borders have been closed then it's either Australia or New Zealand, i.e. will cost thousands each time.

@appleturnovers
Yes I got that bit but OPs parents are paying for the first trip. If OP is considering the second then she has the funds to pay for one too.

I can see the pluses and minuses of both.

Would your parents come for a little mini break with you, when you go to the wedding, if you wait until then ?

Would you be able to come over for longer if you come later in the year? A week seems such a short time for such a long flight.

It does seem a shame to miss the wedding of such a long standing friend, if you are able to travel home every couple of years.

I'm not sure if your parents are paying just for you, or for all your family ? If it is all the family, in April, what is the possibility of you coming again, on your own, for the wedding ?

Friend’s wedding v hug your mum? Hug your mum ASAP. They can be the oldest friend in the world, but I’d still choose hug Mum (and I’m as sure as I can be that my oldest friend would tell me to do the same thing, rather than attend their wedding. Because they care about me more than one day of their life)

Oh - and similar travel situation, before anyone jumps on that

Prioritize hugging your mum and spending time with her. Your friend should understand.

[quote Burnamer]@appleturnovers
Yes I got that bit but OPs parents are paying for the first trip. If OP is considering the second then she has the funds to pay for one too.[/quote]
Yes maybe but holiday time from work would likely rule that out

I'd love to be able to do both, but would struggle with the time away from work AND family. DH would understand 1 trip to the UK with out him, doubt I'd get away with 2 - in 6 months !!