We each have a car but I inherited mine off my
Dad as well as a sum of money to pay a year’s worth insurance (I haven’t paid for a year upfront, I put the money into a savings account and set up a monthly direct debit). My insurance was cancelled last month because I had a black box and accidentally deleted the app from my phone. Instead of renewing my insurance, I put myself as a named driver and DH as the main insurer on my car as it’s cheaper and he has a no claims bonus.
Anyway, something went wrong with his exhaust today and he wanted to go to the garage and get it looked at. I’ve arranged something at 4.15, but he wanted me to stay home and pick him up in case his car needs to stay in the garage. I told him that, honestly, I’m not comfortable driving that distance. Prior to inheriting my Dad’s car, I didn’t drive for the best part of two years. DH never insured me on his car because I only passed my test 2 months before lockdown. I’m honestly having panic attacks at the thought of driving in a busy town I’m not familiar with. I feel mean, but I can’t afford to have a panic attack with my toddler sat in the backseat. I know this might sound pathetic to some but I’ve even booked refresher lessons to build my confidence back up. I’ve driven ds to the doctor and I’ve driven to the supermarkets and my mother’s house (all a 15 minute drive). I haven’t driven further because since I had a nervous breakdown last year, I’ve lost a lot of confidence doing things I wouldn’t have thought twice about before.
DH asked how he’s supposed to get back, so I asked him if he could get it looked at another day. He has my car until then, plus it’ll cost him anything between £20 and £200 which we can’t really afford (we have over 10k of debt between us, most of it is his). I think he should wait until the end of the month when all the bills are paid! He says he’s going to ask his boss for an advance payment, but I swear this is the third time in under a year.
I arranged to go to church tonight (which is an hour and a half) and DH said he’d stay with ds. I was out with ds all day yesterday whilst he sat upstairs gaming. I came back to the house still a tip and this morning he didn’t get out of bed until 10 because he stayed up last night (gaming - as per usual). I was up at 5.58 this morning. I know he thinks I’m being selfish and he gave me a mini lecture on compromise and said the best way to get over my fear of driving places, is to just do it. But I feel his lecture on compromise is ironic as he wouldn’t even consider letting me on his insurance when I passed my test (with only four minors).
Should I cancel church and stay on standby for him? Just suck it up and drive? Or shouldn’t I drive unless I feel confident?