Page 4 | Middle & upper class more money savvy than most?

Whammyyammy · 04/02/2022 13:13

I loathe the class system, so don't use it.
Our combined income is circa £90k, no kids. We drive a 7 year old BMW and my husband an 8 year old motor bike. Both owned, no hp etc and we're not expensive.
My husbands mate has a new RR sport and his wife a new audi soft top, both on hp/pcp/never never. Both in low paid jobs, have 2 DC and always moaning they're skint 🤷‍♂️

I don't think I'm savvy, just not lavish

ElftonWednesday · 04/02/2022 13:14

Also buying stuff second hand is not only frugal but better for the environment. DDs are well into charity shops.

OrangeShark27 · 04/02/2022 13:15

As well if you have the money you are constantly thinking about saving it, planning how your going to save it etc.

If there's no money to save a lot of the savvy/frugal tips are just day to day realities. Someone who really has no money does a lot of these things but it's not a tip or a trick it's just life.

If your forced to shop in say a charity shop, there's going to be more emotions attached to charity shop clothes, maybe embarrassment, you might not necessarily want people to know you are struggling. When you get a bit more money it's natural to want to spend that on something you can't usually afford like new clothes.

If there's no emotions attached to shopping in charity shops, if its not a forced choice ans everyone already knows your rich then it's much easier to make that decision, and present it as a choice you've made because your savvy and frugal, rather than I had to shop in a charity shop because I had no money.

Iggly · 04/02/2022 13:17

It’s easy to be savvy when you have more money. You have more choices and can do things like buy in bulk, drive to a cheaper supermarket, buy things that will last for longer but cost more upfront.

Goldenbear · 04/02/2022 13:21

The Waitrose shoppers though, they are not all poor are they, with cars bought on HP. So not everyone has to make the food budget sacrifice to go Skiing! Is it really just the ostentatious eating in expensive restaurants- not really. It maybe comforting to tell ourselves this but it is not true!

InisnaBro · 04/02/2022 13:30

@Southerngal5

DC in very mc school with very affluent parents... The talk non stop is about energy bills, bragging about getting free toys on Facebook groups (but they sell their stuff😉) their dc wear second hand clothes... Is this just my area? Forgot to mention they gave an obsession with Aldi & Lidl...

Leaving aside the finances and class stuff, are these people not incredibly dull to be around?

I mean, I'm not interested in my own switch of energy suppliers, far less anyone else's. No one's expecting the school run to be the Algonquin Round Table, but this sounds like the conversational equivalent of watching concrete set.

Goldenbear · 04/02/2022 13:32

Yes I was thinking that- mind you second most boring conversation at my school gates, Covid, LFs and PCRs.

RedHelenB · 04/02/2022 13:34

@Southerngal5

DC in very mc school with very affluent parents... The talk non stop is about energy bills, bragging about getting free toys on Facebook groups (but they sell their stuff😉) their dc wear second hand clothes... Is this just my area? Forgot to mention they gave an obsession with Aldi & Lidl...

Think you're describing mumsnet here. Honestly don't get the Aldi/Lidl obsession, co op much better.

MiddleNameJane · 04/02/2022 13:37

On these threads, a big stereotyped bogeyman always appears: the wealthy, greedy SAHM, selling off her kids' old underwear whilst cackling over the free stuff she's hoovered up off Freecycle while other people are working.

Also the stereotype of the working class Mum who wouldn't dream of buying secondhand ever.

I'm sure these people exist in the extemes, but in my world, I notice that at my DCs' school (mixed demographic) everyone seems to use the secondhand uniform shop. I see parents, including SAHMs donating stuff as well as selling. Donating to the PTA. Giving generous birthday gifts etc. Sure some also love being frugal, but I can't see much wrong with that 🤷🏻‍♀️

daimbarsatemydogsbone · 04/02/2022 13:39

Not this shit again.

Goldenbear · 04/02/2022 13:41

I agree with that balance is more akin to real life but I do know someone who conforms to that stereotype and I do think there is a problem with being tight not just frugal. When does frugal turn in to tight.

MrsLargeEmbodied · 04/02/2022 13:46

i love a bargain but it doesnt mean i have any savings.

JustMarriedBecca · 04/02/2022 13:47

Disagree it's class. My brother and I were raised by the same parents. We have similar incomes, him from working his way up, mine as a several years post graduation professional career (solicitor).
I save money, am conscious of pensions and will shop at Aldi and Lidl.
He will spend hundreds on random stuff he doesn't need because he has money in his pocket.

I personally find living frugally quite a project (done the wedding and baby thing, then the house thing) and find it a bit of a challenge. But we have lots of holidays and I buy Boden for the kids. It's how we choose to spend money.

My SIL (who has substantially less money than we do) would think nothing of a trip to the zoo, £30 on chicken nugget meals and another £20 on toys in the shop. We'd go with them to the zoo, take a M & S picnic and the kids don't expect toys from gift shops. I do think she often seeks to spend more as a status symbol of the fact she can 'keep up' when frankly I couldn't give a shit.

MrsLargeEmbodied · 04/02/2022 13:47

i remember my dd had a idiotic know it all friend who said that poor people are poor because they spend their money on alcohol

MrsLargeEmbodied · 04/02/2022 13:48

@daimbarsatemydogsbone

Not this shit again.

yep

ChildHeadache · 04/02/2022 13:50

Your sil may well think its a waste to buy boden and/or shop second hand. In that csse its priorities isn't it? Others would see an M and S picknic as excessive so wouldn't see you as frugal at allwith m ands and boden!! Particulalry those on low income.

Its one of those irregular verbs.

I am frugal/make good choices
They waste money.

Neurodiversitydoctor · 04/02/2022 13:51

I have been guilty of this. When the children were younger I worked 3 days a week. I meal planned (from Lidl)everything including after school to minimise expense, took a picnic everywhere, theme parks were from cereal packets. We had some real bargain basement ski holidays driving through France with handed down ski gear, frozen homemade meals and UK supermarket chocolate in the boot to minimise spend in resort. You are right there was an element of challenge to managing it.

Neurodiversitydoctor · 04/02/2022 13:54

Meal planned everything including after school snacks. Baked weekly, made stock etc.

ChrissyPlummer · 04/02/2022 13:54

I think you’re right OP, from my (very limited) experience. One example I can think of is I knew a family (friend of a friend type thing) who were wealthy. They had a lovely house, in a nice area. Both kids had been to private schools and skiing holidays etc.

Their cars were pretty old and battered, house was clean and comfortable but no big, plasma TV, no Sky/Virgin, no new gadgets, they had Barbour jackets and wellies but all were about 20+ years old. They would definitely not have spent money on takeaway coffees or just bought something because they could (and they definitely could).

Neurodiversitydoctor · 04/02/2022 13:55

Meanwhile DH does the switching energy providers/home maintanence/ DIY.

Appleandoranges · 04/02/2022 13:56

I don't think class needs to be mentioned here at all. But I think one of the huge benefits of having a lot money is that you don't have to be money savvy on a day to basis. You can just spend on what you want. And be frugal when you choose. When you don't have money, frugality is something you are forced to do. And so you're much more likely to resent it. So if you have money, picking up good quality second hand clothes seems like a lovely bargain. And selling stuff on ebay in your free time may even be fun. But when you don't have money, being frugal is not a choice so you are far more likely to resent it. I don't think being good/frugal with money is related to the class you're in or even how much money you have. Also some people just have more extravagant tastes than others - like massive houses/nice clothes/holidays etc. Whereas others are just more content staying at home/don't get anything out of buying expensive handbags. It's just personal preferences. Nothing wrong with either way.

1AngelicFruitCake · 04/02/2022 13:58

Some of my colleagues don’t have much money but I’m amazed at how often they ‘pop to the shop’, buy unnecessary clothes for their children etc.
I’ve got lots of money saved but day to day I’m frugal. I shop at Aldi, don’t buy many clothes and I’m over the moon if I’m given hand me downs from other parents for my children.
Perhaps I’m weird! I spend on big things for our house, holidays and days out.

Goldenbear · 04/02/2022 13:58

If I want a coffee out and about, I will have one as for me I feel like I work quite hard and want some happiness in my life at that point that is not about planning ahead with a flask for instance. Sometimes, I do use a flask but mostly if I know there isn't going to be a local cafe. Also, I don't go to Costa type places, I go to independent coffee shops and want to help the local economy.

Nevermakeit · 04/02/2022 14:01

I think there is definitely something in this. We are MC and I have zero issues buying things second hand. My kids toddler bed was about 3rd hand. In fact, when I have managed to make a saving on something, I actually feel a sense of achievement!
I was shocked when I then offered it to a friend who is significantly less well off than us, and she said her WC husband put his foot down and said 'new baby, new things'. He would rather go to Argos and buy some crap but brand new, rather than a good quality real wood second hand bed....
Same with bikes. My children have never had a new bike, always second hand, but always good bikes - Isla, Frog, Carrera etc. I am always amazed by the people who go to Halfords and get something much less high quality, but new, for same price.
I also think there is something about self restraint. If my children are hungry/thirsty when out, we and the families I know say 'wait till we get home' (within reason obviously. But I do think they can wait a bit, unless its a hot day and it's going to be hours - the same as I would). Whereas some more WC families seem to head straight to the closest newsagent to buy refreshments, as if the children literally can't contain myself - whereas I think it's good to learn to delay that gratification.

Pembertonrd · 04/02/2022 14:03

@Southerngal5

My problem is little luxuries eg I like going for a coffee with said mums to the local Costa maybe once a week or fortnight... A coffee date was mentioned this morning & then the chief (& probably the most well to do) suggested as the morning were getting brighter & warmer we should bring flasks of tea/coffee to the park & one or two of us could russle up some scones... Other mums enthusiastically agreed & of course said how overpriced costa was anyways....

Dh and I started meeting up with friends on a Sunday am dog walk when meeting outdoors was the safe option and cafés were still closed. We took flasks and cakes to have whilst sat at the picnic tables next to the car park. We enjoyed it so much that we still take flasks and cakes. Saves about £10 per couple.