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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what you would do: Jobs

27 replies

UoMomster · 02/02/2022 13:56

Please help me- which should I do. I am torn.
Background 2 kids (5 and 2.5). DH can wfh and is hands on with drop offs/facilitating after school clubs etc. He is the higher earner (approx 150% of my salary).

Job 1:
-3 days a week (22.5 hours) flexible working (sometimes office/sometimes home depending on meetings etc)
-Failed to get a promotion recently despite doing the higher level job- was v disappointed. Waiting to see if current role can be upgraded as am already doing it (however been told there will be no financial uplift despite higher workload)
-Good opportunity for progression in future
-Flexible so can take time off for kids stuff and also can take A/L in school hols with no limit. Also generous A/L allowance (40 days/year!)
-Not really what I want to do. I 'don't mind' it but no huge passion

Job 2:
-33 hours a week in 3 days (11 hour days). I would drop kids at school/nursery, DH would do pick up. I would miss bedtimes those days
-Less flexible- 27 A/L days a year, always in office (in a hospital), A/L limited to 1 week xmas, 1 at easter and 2 over summer.
-Good opportunity for progression and will fund training
-I love it. Absolutely my passion and day to day would enjoy work much more.
-More money as compressed hours so same childcare bill but more hours in 3 days, Salary same as now to start (just under 40K).

WWYD? I have amazing work/life balance now but feel so unhappy and blah in my job.

OP posts:
FelicityBob · 02/02/2022 13:58

Option 2 because you love it, it’s more money, more hours in same amount of days

BlondeDogLady · 02/02/2022 14:03

Number 2 - I'm surprised you have to ask.

YellowLemonz · 02/02/2022 14:04

Do what you love

altiara · 02/02/2022 14:05

Change!

Wilkolampshade · 02/02/2022 14:05

No 2.

emilyintheSE · 02/02/2022 14:05

Job 1 for the flexibility but seems I'm in the minority!

MaryLennoxsScowl · 02/02/2022 14:09

Option 2! The opportunities for progression in option 1 are much less promising if they wouldn’t give you a promotion you were already doing.

Original poster
UoMomster · 02/02/2022 14:13

I am thinking 2 but I've had so many people tell me not to give up the flexibility/annual leave with having kids in school, I will regret it in a few years, holidays will be a nightmare etc etc.

OP posts:
FelicityBob · 02/02/2022 14:15

My kids go to holiday club and they survive. I also work in the NHS and aren’t allowed more than 2 weeks a year AL in the school holidays but it’s fine. And you’ll only be working 3 days a week so it’s not like you’ll be absent all week

FelicityBob · 02/02/2022 14:16

Oh I assumed NhS because you said in a hospital. Is in NHS?

MadeForThis · 02/02/2022 14:34

Option 2.

Original poster
UoMomster · 02/02/2022 14:40

Hi @FelicityBob yes NHS. The other is Higher Education.

OP posts:
FelicityBob · 02/02/2022 14:43

@UoMomster

Hi *@FelicityBob* yes NHS. The other is Higher Education.
In the NHS you get more holiday the longer you work for them. I get 8 weeks holiday now after 10 years service
Suzi888 · 02/02/2022 14:46

Job 2 hands down

FelicityBob · 02/02/2022 14:48

Have you actually tried job 2 or had any experience of it? It may not meet your expectations and then you’ve left a solid job for something not as family friendly

Original poster
UoMomster · 02/02/2022 14:49

@FelicityBob yes- its what I did before my current job (albeit a different Trust although I know people who have worked in that clinic and they said its great). I miss the NHS although wonder if I am looking with rose tinted glasses 5 years out of it!

OP posts:
FelicityBob · 02/02/2022 15:08

Curious to know what clinic role does 11 hour days?

Original poster
UoMomster · 02/02/2022 15:19

Its opthalmology outpatients 8:30-8 but 11 hours (0.5 hour unpaid break)! Bit outing...!

OP posts:
Thedogscollar · 02/02/2022 15:31

Go with your passion.
NHS is in a state, I work there too but for sickness and pension benefits they are the best out there.
Good luck.

Original poster
UoMomster · 02/02/2022 15:35

Thanks @Thedogscollar. I know its tough but my area (generally) isn't as badly affected as isn't acute. Pension is great and A/L entitlement etc is good too!

OP posts:
poetryandwine · 02/02/2022 15:45

Option 2. Mainly because it is your passion and your family can make it work. But I am also a bit sceptical about your prospects with your current employer given that you were not promoted into a role you were already doing and your new job classification will not bring an uplift.

Given the dynamics of HE I would not be shocked if, if and when you give notice, your employer opens a new conversation about that uplift. I find this pretty disgusting TBH

MeanderingGently · 02/02/2022 15:53

I'd go for number 2 as well. More money, you love the role, and your family situation seems to be able to make it work....what's to lose?

Original poster
UoMomster · 02/02/2022 16:01

I know @poetryandwine it was really disheartening and I feel it was tactical (or maybe I would just like to think that and not just that I wasn't good enough Grin ). I just feel disillusioned and overworked. I know the NHS is stressful but its different pressures to HE and I would enjoy the job much more so feel I would cope with the negatives better.

OP posts:
aibutohavethisusername · 02/02/2022 16:01

I’d go with what you love, 2.

LampLighter414 · 02/02/2022 17:08

Number 2. It's something you're excited about. Job 1 are treating you like a mug and please do not convince yourself that it will change, expect more responsibility to come over the years with minimal pay rises or title changes to reflect - they have already set the tone.