To reveal my trauma to the hairdresser

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Long story short.. I used to be fine with my hair being pulled (lightly) but last year I was persuaded to go to a club with my DH and i had a very traumatic experience when a man pulled my hair (that I had not consented to) I mean to the extreme. Like I thought all the hairs were going to be ripped from my head.

Since then I have very bad sensitivity to my hair being pulled or any pressure on my hair, and the last few times I've been to the hairdresser I have really struggled when they are washing and brushing my hair as it pulls quite a lot.. they are not being gentle. Not a criticism of my hairdresser at all she's lovely and I love her, but I'm nervous about the next appt next week.

Should i mention it to her and ask her to be gentler? Or would that be weird..

Of course just explain to her what happened.

If it feels easier you could just say you've got a condition that means you need them to handle your hair and scalp very gently.

Definitely tell her. No need for details, just that a man assaulted you and pulled your hair and now you’re very sensitive to your hair being handled, so please can they be very gentle when washing and brushing. Maybe text/email her about it beforehand if you feel awkward saying it in person.

Good suggestion from @Yuckypretty too - whatever makes you most comfortable

I’ve had to refuse head massages etc because of a head injury I sustained in an accident. I can’t stand anyone touching the scars as it brings back all the PTSD type stuff it took me years to process. I just explained this factually to my hairdresser once and she’s made a note. I’ve never had to mention it again.

I don't like having my hair washed at the hairdresser. I was is at home, right before I leave for the appointment, and wrap it in a scarf. It is a little unusual as it's quite an expensive salon, but it works for me.

100% tell her.
She won’t want to cause you any pain/ further trauma.

Just tell her you’re head sore. They will be used to this.

Hairdressers used to use the term "headsore" when I was a kid (40 odd years ago). Meaning some people can't take much scalp / hair touching at all, for whatever reason. If you don't want to go into your reasons, this should be enough. Tho it might be an old-fashioned term!

Thank you for the help and advice everyone I will definitely say something

I’m a hairdresser and I have clients with varying degrees of what they can tolerate, both pressure and heat wise. Your hairdresser will have the same and would not mind in the least you asking her to be more gentle. And you don’t need to explain if you’d rather not, just tell her your scalp is very sensitive

I just don't like strangers touching me, no trauma involved, so I ask for hair wash to be as quick as possible, no head massage etc and hairdressers have always been fine with that

I'm sorry that traumatic event happened to you. It's not weird at all to tell them! I've got super thin hair that gets knotted almost instantly and I told my new hairdresser over the phone that I don't want the massage portion just the wash and explained that it causes me so much pain that I sometimes cry afterwards. I then reiterated it at the actual appt and she was amazing! She was so caring and gentle with brushing and blow drying. It was the best experience I've had at a salon. If you're not comfortable telling the hairdresser the real reason, just use mine! You'll thank yourself for speaking up. X