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AIBU?

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Sex with younger men - AIBU

14 replies

ChameNanged76 · 24/01/2022 14:46

I'm recently single after a 10 year relationship, I'm early 30s.
I've joined a dating app and honestly - I'm only after a casual relationship/FWB type set up. I don't want a relationship at all for now.
I've found that when "browsing" these apps, I am naturally more attracted to men in their early-mid 20s! I've never really looked at younger guys, but I think given the type of thing I'm looking for, with no strings, expectations and/or baggage that comes with us the older we get, I seem to be swiping more on younger guys.
They also seem to be way more keen and ready to set up dates (seem to like the idea of a woman in their 30s).
Obviously it's not illegal, or even close, but when I've mentioned this to friends they seem to he pretty split in their opinions - those that disagree seem to he disgusted by it as well, with quite extreme reactions.
Now, I know some younger guys can look a lot younger, but any of of the ones I've chatted to look/seem mature for their age. I'm also not misleading or "using" anyone by pretending I'm after anything other than a casual relationship - I'm completely transparent about what I'm looking for, so it's not as if I'm manipulating anyone.
Is this deemed totally inappropriate?

YANBU - nothing wrong with 2 consenting adults doing as they please.
YABU - no you're disgusting.

OP posts:
BadLad · 24/01/2022 14:48

It's fine.

RedCandyApple · 24/01/2022 14:49

Tbh I don’t think you need to worry I imagine most guys in their early 20s
Are only looking for a bit of fun as well. I think it’s fine

Hellodarknessmyoldpal · 24/01/2022 14:51

Of course it's fine. Can't see why anyone would be disgusted by this. As long as noone is being misled (and youve already said this) then it seems like a win win!

ChameNanged76 · 24/01/2022 15:17

Well that's reassuring so thank you. I was starting to think I was having some sort of early mid-life crisis !
I will absolutely crack on and enjoy myself in that case Grin Wink

OP posts:
Kindofhecticinside · 24/01/2022 15:18

For a FWB set up this is probably ideal, men in early 20s probably want that too rather than any relationship. Go for it!

HacerSonarSusPasos · 24/01/2022 15:23

It's fine. I would say it would be yucky if you went for 18-20 year olds. But anything over 23-24 I would not bat a eye. They're fully grown adults.

KaptainKaveman · 24/01/2022 15:23

Use protection and take regular tests.

Lemonweightloss · 24/01/2022 15:28

@ChameNanged76, YANBU.
It's strange I just saw this post because I'm a massive tennis fan and was just watching the Australian Open, and instead of marvelling their sporting prowess, I'm imagining a different prowess!
I'm 55.
Now THAT'S a midlife crisis.
Enjoy yourself.

WhyYesYABU · 24/01/2022 15:35

I felt no disgust reading your post but I'm 31, currently breastfeeding baby no 3 and despite being happily married I felt a wave of jealousy Blush

LouLou789 · 24/01/2022 15:40

When I was 39 I had a very thrilling fling with a 26 year old. YANBU.

crosbystillsandmash · 24/01/2022 15:41

Just be careful about the whole 'casual relationship' thing.
Age 37 I'd come out of a long marriage and was looking for something fun. I met someone who was 25 and fitted the bill.

He's currently making me a cup of tea, as I'm recovering from covid. I'm now 50!
The casual thing didn't quite work out, despite the age gap Grin

DontBlameMe79 · 24/01/2022 15:55

No problem at all. I’ve done a similar age gap on a casual basis and had some good results. Agree with comments to avoid strings unless you’ve considered very carefully.

strawberrymilk7 · 24/01/2022 16:07

Can't see anything at all wrong with this! Would your friends have an issue if you were dating a man 10 years older than you? Have fun (use a condom Wink)

hangrylady · 24/01/2022 16:10

Why not
Nobody would bat an eyelid at a man in his early 30s dating a woman in her mid 20s

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