To have sent this text to my brother and sister?

[SelfishMrsClaus]

My brother and sister are my ds's godparents.

It was his b'day yesterday & the rest of my family called or text to wish him a happy birthday.

when it came to 9pm last night I was slightly angry, as my dsis lives 5 mins away from me never mind phoning, she could have stopped by to say happy b'day. My bro has no kids of his own, but his wife has 3 nieces & never would dare let their b'day pass by without acknowledgement, never mind a gift (this I don't care about anyway as he got enough for C'mas) but not even to send a card!

Anyway I was pissed (both pissed off & had too much to drink!) by 9pm so text them both: "XXXXX had a lovely birthday " That was all... nothing insulting or hurtful, or nothing to tell them how hurt I was... my ister replied saying she thought it was the 28th! I believe this, as she did this last yr too..dropping by on the 27th with his gift as she would be away the next day! So she hit it lucky & was her on his b'day.

This morn I got a text from my bro's phone from my SIL "your brother wasn't ablt to visit the children as he has been sick for 5 days, your parents are that concerned they are visiting later"

FFS, I wasn't expecting a visit!! Merely a reply saying "Happy bday" would have sufficed! When I called my mam she said that bro wasn't that bad at all & had some dinner when they were there... she is sure that bro doesn't know about reply from SIL.

The bit that grates me most is "YOUR BROTHER" ffs, why the fuck couldnt she say his name???

Anyway, I might be being unreasonable.. my child is 3, a poor wee defenseless soul, my brother adores him... he probably just forgot his b'day which is why I was telling him he had a good day as well as a gentle reminder.... SIL had no need to reply the way she did.

YABU They forgot , it happens . A text would have been nice but did your ds really even notice ? SIL probably thought you already knew your dbro was sick and had ignored them.

had they sent cards or presents? If they hadn't YANBU. If they had then IMHO don't really need to send texts or phone as well. SIL out of order to send that text tho - its your brother's phone FGS!

My sis give him a gift on Saturday, but my brother sent neither. That's not the point though, I don't care about gifts.
The mere fact that her nieces would have had huge gifts, phone calls etc is what is pissing me off. SIL refused to send our side of the family C'mas cards as she sais she couldn't remember the names of all the kids!! I bet she remembers the names of her families kids though!!

tbh I don't do the b'day/Christmas stuff for dh's side of family. I remind him and maybe buy or order but the idea and remembering to post is up to him. Maybe your SIL is same ?

if he was sick, and so sick he has been in bed for 5 days, then sadly, your little one;s birth day would not have been uppermost. your sister sent a present.

so YABU . your child does not know that his godparents have forgotten or missed his birthday due to illness, and forgetfulness..it is easily done, i got my niece's birthday wrong last year, just got it into my head it was the day after it actually was, not malicious or thoughtless, i simply forgot.

your SIL might have been miffed that your bro was ill yet you had not asked after him

life is too short to get upset about this sort of thing, iMO

No, she's not. My other niece (and just so happens to be brother's other god-daughter) had a birthday not so long ago. SIL called & asked what she wanted & got her it.

But we never actually buy Xmas gifts, only to our god children... this wasn't about Xmas, it was his b'day.

Ah I don't even care anymore you know that. SIL has been a moody cow lately, falling out with everyone around her..she has made a new friend who she laughingly refers to as her "Best friend". She has fallen out with my other 2 brothers' wives which leaves family gatherings difficult, but I have always done my best to speak to everyone.

We were all gathering at my parents on C'mas eve & just before the rest of us arrives, brother & SIL left "To put the turkey in the oven"

The point is though, he hadn't been ill for 5 days He was OK on C'mas eve. He was fine on C'mas day. So if he has been sick it wasn't for days.

And I did reply asking after him this afternoon, I am still waiting a reply.

I guess IABU though

Will put it down to experience.

I do know how youre feeling my dh bother and his wife made no mention of ds1 birthday (no present/card followed I thought they might have forgotten) and this year on the 22nd we just got a text very late on in the day for ds2 1st birthdsay but again no present / card to follow. Sil couldnt make ds1 birthday as she has a bridesmaid fitting? (she knew about our party first) - we are meant to be a close family.... - I was very hurt both times - I guess it made me feel like my children arent worth remembering. They now have a dc tehmselves and I think theyd go absol bonkers if the situ was reversed. Said nothing to them. They are fabulous at remembering all birthdays / dates / recognising and sending cards for everyone and anything so find it strange both my ds 1st birthdays passed with no thought

oh well, i think you are right, let this one go !

have a glass of wine and breaaaaaaathe !

MOJAP, that's the thing. We are a very close family.
There are 8 of us & we have always been close. I am not annoyed/angry at my sister as she has gotten mixed up between 27th & 28th last yr too!

It is merely the fact that SIL has been driving a wedge between brother & our family for 2 years now, since my other sister's wedding. She called my other brother's wife a bitch & tried to start a row between me & my brother, by telling me stuff brother had said about me... but I asked brother there & then & it turned out to be lies.

I guess I just feel like ds isn't important enough to be remembered!
DD's b'day was Xmas eve & hardly anyone remembered either... I guess they are at a bad time of the year.. well I hope it's that & not the fact that nobody cares!

So maybe with it being both their birthdays being forgotten I am feeling it a bit.