Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be scared to check my messages?

13 replies

aimeemcl · 23/01/2022 20:58

I don't have a good/close relationship with my line manager at work and have seen her once in the last year. I got sick with Covid before Christmas and then hit with another infection and have been really poorly since.

The protocol is normally to phone the department you work in on a Monday morning and let them know you're sick and they pass it on. Since Covid, rules have changed slightly. I called the first Monday and was told that I was to text my line manager's personal mobile number with updates.

She mentioned in a text that the department is extremely short staffed (NHS) and did I have any idea when I would be back. I'm not being asked for a doctor's note as Covid doesn't require one (though it would normally be for 10 days or so and I've been ill for a month now).

Earlier today I sent the text to say that I am still unfit to return to work and then I disabled message notifications on my phone. Currently on my laptop and can see I have two iMessages. I'm scared to look, please tell me I'm being silly and that she can't guilt trip me into going back?!

OP posts:
Sofiegiraffe · 23/01/2022 21:02

She mentioned in a text that the department is extremely short staffed (NHS) and did I have any idea when I would be back

This is a wholly inappropriate thing to say to a sick employee. Asking when you might be back isn't so bad. But the staffing situation isn't your problem. If you're sick, you're sick, and you shouldn't feel pressured into returning until you're 100% well enough to.

Idontgiveagriffindamn · 23/01/2022 21:02

She can’t guilt trip you into going back but you may need a fit note soon for you illness regardless of whether it is covid or not. But I think it’s 28 days self certification now.

Original poster
aimeemcl · 23/01/2022 21:15

It’s currently 28 days self cert but in the NHS you don’t need a sick line if it’s Covid related. I plan to try and get a doctors appointment this week as I’m still unwell from my other infection.

I gave in and looked at the message and she’s said she’s disappointed to hear I won’t be back and the department will need to close later in the week as my colleague has prebooked annual leave. Now I feel awful.

OP posts:
LolaButt · 23/01/2022 21:23

I would respond saying that I’m disappointed to be so unwell, and she has my best wishes with resolving her staffing issues.

Daisy4569 · 23/01/2022 21:32

Not your issue that they are understaffed and she shouldn’t even be mentioning it

GrapefruitPink · 23/01/2022 21:34

Not your issue.
She's guilt tripping.

VioletOcean · 23/01/2022 21:38

Keep her response and when you’re ready go to HR and put in a formal complaint about her. She’s being a bitch. If your sick you’re sick and all age should be saying is thanks for letting me know, hope you feeling better soon. Not that head fuck shit she said

FortySeven · 23/01/2022 21:39

Ex-HR here. That is a disgraceful, unprofessional response and completely unacceptable to send to a colleague on sick leave. Personally I’d set out in an email the fact that you reported your sickness as per the rules and self-isolated for the required length of time as per the guidelines. Then say that you did not feel her reply was appropriate and would appreciate an explanation as to what more you could/should have done. Don’t do this until you’re back at work though - switch off email and recover. What an absolutely piece of shit your manager sounds! You are not in the wrong here.

Hope you feel better soon Flowers

MinnieGirl · 23/01/2022 21:39

@aimeemcl

It’s currently 28 days self cert but in the NHS you don’t need a sick line if it’s Covid related. I plan to try and get a doctors appointment this week as I’m still unwell from my other infection.

I gave in and looked at the message and she’s said she’s disappointed to hear I won’t be back and the department will need to close later in the week as my colleague has prebooked annual leave. Now I feel awful.

Sounds familiar! Good old NHS manager, bulky your staff and make them feel guilty instead of supporting them with their sickness..

It is not your problem that her department is short staffed. Or that a colleague has annual leave. You are poorly.

I wouldn’t bother to respond to her, but if she sends another message then reply and say that you have told her you remain unwell and to please stop messaging you.

Sn0tnose · 23/01/2022 21:42

She’s being completely inappropriate.

Although I believe the 28 day self cert thing ends on 22nd Jan (today?) which might affect when you call your GP if it’s for your other infection.

Mydogmylife · 23/01/2022 22:00

@aimeemcl

It’s currently 28 days self cert but in the NHS you don’t need a sick line if it’s Covid related. I plan to try and get a doctors appointment this week as I’m still unwell from my other infection.

I gave in and looked at the message and she’s said she’s disappointed to hear I won’t be back and the department will need to close later in the week as my colleague has prebooked annual leave. Now I feel awful.

Don't . Colleague on leave can give up her time just as easily as unwell staff can return to work ! She trying to guilt trip you
OneSolitaryCornflake · 23/01/2022 22:05

I'd be careful with the sick notes as I think they sre changing it back again soon.

Your manager was well out of order to try and guilt you back in

Houseplantmad · 23/01/2022 22:48

Concentrate on getting yourself better and not worrying about your boss. You can't help being ill. She could do something about being an utter knob.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page