To ask work to always have a 30min lunch break?

[Onlyrainbows]

It doesn't happen everyday (and I'm new at my job!) But I need to go and get my toddler from nursery around lunchtime, but today, they've dumped so many meetings on me that I'd be late for him (I've asked nursery it it would be ok, sometimes they're flexible but I know they have staffing issues). Do you think that's too much to ask (from my employers).

Op, explain your situation to your manager and see if you can agree something that works.

If you're not able to block out half an hour at lunch time and being seen to be in a meeting by logging on via your phone when you're doing pick up is satisfactory then do that on days when it's a juggle.

@Twitterwhooooo

OP's toddler is at nursery at the moment, I think.

And everyone posting on here to chastise the OP - are you either not at work today or is your employer happy for you to be posting on social media?

The toddler might be at nursery or not as it's now around lunchtime but the OP has been posting on and off since just before 11am despite apparently having lots of meetings this morning.

I'm not at work today but when I am I absolutely don't while away my working day starting MN threads, I thought that would be pretty bog standard for most people too.

I’d block it out in your calendar. Also speak to the person sending the recurring meeting to see if it can be delayed. Also make your manager aware.

I don’t have children but when you’re in back to back meetings you actually need 30 mins around lunch time to just have some head space. I’m pretty flexible with my staff that have kids, well anyone in the team as I know the usual work boundaries are strained with WFH.

You don’t get paid for lunch so take it!

I'd have a recurring meeting in your diary, set to 'out of office', and say 'Nursery pick up - no meetings' then decline any meeting that clashes.

Do you actually need to ask formally for a lunch break, or can you just decline any meetings that fall in those 30 minutes? I'm always declining and saying "I can do after 2pm" or whatever, and people do the same to me. It's never questioned; clashes happen all the time.

We’re very flexible. We also expect that back.
Absolutely no issue with you wanting a break (of course!) and none with you having your child when working if that wasn’t detrimental, which it sounds like it isn’t.
That doesn’t just mean child is sleeping - we’d be perfectly happy with you bouncing child on your knee during a call on a rare occasion if they’ve woken early. Like I said - it’s about flexibility both ways. In my case in return, I do things like 5am calls (very rarely!) because of Australia.

We would however have an issue with you just never being available at a set lunchtime that was within core hours, to do a nursery run. Missing the odd call because it, no issue. But it wouldn’t be acceptable to miss meetings on a regular basis for a middle of the day pick up.

Just to add: in my role there’s no concept of protecting a specific lunch time away from meetings, because we have 3 European times zones in at most times - and that sounds similar to you. And some people think lunch is 11:45 (looking at you, Paris team!) and other like to go at their 13:00. It’s just not practical to aim for a protected hour.

Why does your toddler have to come home to sleep? Our DD went to full Day nursery and they had naps in their rooms, mats on the floor and a blanket.

Do you need to have your camera on at all times?

I have been known to join a Teams on my phone to run an errand and then rejoin on my PC and no-one is any the wiser; if you have the Teams app on your phone you can switch between devices quite easily (assuming you are on Teams and not Zoom although I'm sure Zoom is similar?). If I'm presenting or talking a lot, it's not easy, but if I'm mostly listening, it's quite easy.

I find your request extremely reasonable, you are entitled to a break.

Even taking account of the flexibility needed to work across different time zones, it’s only half an hour and it won’t last forever!

In my workplace if there were pressing meetings during the lunch hour you would just leave early or join late if needed.

I agree with blocking out the time if you need it. I work flexibly and if I have times I need to do stuff, I mark it as out of office. Having back to back meetings all day is really unproductive anyway.

What gaps do you usually have or is it random ?

I'm currently being able to reply as the guy I have a meeting with is either late or a no show! Anywho, toddler sleeps like a rock, so no issue there. He could sleep there but he's not used to it.

@TimeForTeaAndG

Why does your toddler have to come home to sleep? Our DD went to full Day nursery and they had naps in their rooms, mats on the floor and a blanket.

Because OP doesn't want to pay for nursery in the afternoon!

I made it to collect my toddler! I'm happy to be flexible enough to work 50hrs, I don't mind it in that sense. I love meetings, I love all hands meetings. I'm just used to having a bit more agency around my lunch time!

Don't be a sap OP, you are of course entitled to a half hour lunch break. And if the back to back meetings can't be arranged to suit a UK lunchtime, because eg you need people from AsiaPac and people from US, then you say, " please go ahead and I'll join the meeting from my Phone and go on mute while I drive to pick up my little one." Or you say in advance to the meeting host, "I've accepted the invitation but please note I'm busy at 12.30pm, so i have a hard stop and will drop off the call then. If we could aim to cover the main agenda items in the first 20 mins of the call that would be ideal."

Or push back on a world of back-to-back meetings and ask, "do you actively need my contribution in this meeting? If not, I'll ask X to debrief me afterwards/I'll reply and comment on any items as needed in the Minutes you circulate after the meeting."

It's not that I don't want to pay. The nursery doesn't have availability at the moment and because of how long he sleeps for is a bit of a waste of resources, but nursery is figuring out if they can offer it next Month

You just need to block out the time you need in your diary and not accept meetings during that time.
It’s awkward but that is what I would advise you if you worked for me and came to me with this problem.

Indeed NotTheGrinchAgain.

Attending meetings that you don't actually need to are such a time and energy sap for so many workers.

You say that your company is family friendly OP - just let them know your set up and it sounds like they will accommodate with a bit of give and take both ways.

I've just seen that you have evening meetings outside of your contracted hours nearly every night and work 50 hours a week rather than your contracted 37.5.

You are most certainly more than within your rights to ask for a bit of give at lunchtimes imvho!

You are entitled to a break, but the timing is to suit business needs, you can't legally demand 1-1.30pm everyday as an example so you need to ask nicely. They are not obliged to change meetings to suit child care, the Athena Swan recommendations are all meetings are between 10&4 which in your case they are

Most of my meetings happen between 10am-8pm. Sometimes they're back to back, sometimes they aren't. Theoretically I have a 1hr lunch break, but usually I can only manage 30mins. That's absolutely fine by me. My only request is to have some predictably around when can I take that lunch break.

@Onlyrainbows

Most of my meetings happen between 10am-8pm. Sometimes they're back to back, sometimes they aren't. Theoretically I have a 1hr lunch break, but usually I can only manage 30mins. That's absolutely fine by me. My only request is to have some predictably around when can I take that lunch break.

Only you (on this thread!) can say how reasonable that predictability would be though. In my organisation - who are great, fair, supportive, flexible - we simply couldn’t guarantee it. Any given meeting yes we could cope without you - just as we do on holidays and illness days, or conflicting meetings. But to frequently be absent - we couldn’t accept that.

Only you know how frequently this would happen, how important these meetings are…

Are all your past meetings in your calendar?

Why not go back through 6 months and look at a couple of lunch slots, and mark off:

1. Did I have a meeting?
2. Would it have mattered if I missed it?
3. Would it have mattered if I regularly missed it?

See for yourself on real data what your request would look like.

@Cocomarine that is a very good suggestion.

I can’t set guarantees around my lunch break - I have to take it to fit with meetings - but if the op did what you suggested she would know how often it’s likely to be a problem.