To worry my child will never use a loo out and about?

[Goblinlamp]

DD is 3 and at home has been toilet trained for two months, literally no issues at all. At nursery and when we're out and about she just will not wee on the loo or travel potty and holds it until she bursts. She'll sit on it, do nothing, then either keep holding or wet herself. She tells us she's never going to do it and will just keeping doing it either in the house or in her trousers. We are going on holiday in a couple of weeks and I've no idea what we're going to do, really not wanting to use nappies again. Will she ever be able to do it?! How can we help?? This feels like the hardest bit of parenting so far!!!

It's a bit tricky I think when they're fully trained at home and had little experience out but do you ever take her with you when you go?

Could you take her out for lunch somewhere with really fancy toilets with just the two of you? Obviously she'll have to come with you once you need the loo, and ask her afterwards if she needs to go before you leave? Would that help?

The reason I say go somewhere with fancy toilets is mine ended up having to check out the toilets everywhere to see what they're like out of pure nosiness. It helped with the toilet training though.

Try the book Oh Crap. It’s a no nonsense approach which worked for us as my DD was very determined. Much of it is about establishing “times” to go for a wee so eg before a car journey I would tell DD to go to the toilet and you can keep an eye on their intake at that age so I would say we aren’t going until you’ve been

I have a child like this. I used to give him no choice, he’d get a reward for going on a public loo. We stayed in a cubicle for 20 minutes once, and I didn’t engage in his drama, remained calm and reassuring, sometimes just ignoring him until eventually….

So In the end he’d go if I was with him, he’s getting better now he’s older but I don’t think he’s ever going to embrace public loos unless absolutely necessary.