Using my dd to entertain his DS.

[bravegirl3]

I have left a relationship where I was scared. I'm just trying to process something's and I know the replies I'll get will say it's wrong but I need to hear if for my own clarification.

My dd A and his DS B were step siblings, similar ages. Got on great. We were lucky there. But it came to a time when ex expected my dd to play with his DS all the time. Ex didn't like it when A went out to play and left B on his own. B didn't like playing out.

I wanted A to play out and have fun rather than playing games consoles all day.

Ex also didn't like it when A had other plans on a weekend meaning B didn't have anyone to play with.

I spent my weekends making sure A and B were getting along.

ExH has said the reason he wanted A to play with B all the time was because it was easier for him so he could watch the football. He was not interested in really playing with B - his son. He just wanted the kids to play so he could relax. It caused me great stress and I am not surprised he had admitted it was to make his life easier.

He was using my Dd to keep his DS entertained.

I have left, this isn't an issue now but I just need clarification to prove to myself I am not going crazy.

You are correct. He is a crap dad. Well done on putting your DD first and not putting up with that nonsense

How awful for your daughter.

Well done for leaving.

There are many more reasons he is a terrible father but when you live with it daily, you sort of just realise that's how it is and it's not that bad when it is. But this one affected my daughter and for him to admit it was because it made his life easier just left me speechless. So many emotions.

Unfortunately I do have a (much loved by me) DS to him so I need to work out how to deal with that going forward. The less he has with his dad the better unfortunately.

@Rainbowqueeen

You are correct. He is a crap dad. Well done on putting your DD first and not putting up with that nonsense

Thank you, I can see it's awful now. Just hard when you live it

@EverNapping

How awful for your daughter.

Well done for leaving.

Thank you, I'm hoping it hasn't done her any long term damage mentally x

He uses women and girls. He used you and he used your daughter. Well done on seeing him and ending it @bravegirl3.

@TooBigForMyBoots

He uses women and girls. He used you and he used your daughter. Well done on seeing him and ending it *@bravegirl3*.

He definitely used me but claims 'that's just how we worked' and never saw i problem. I was obviously scared of him and could never stand up for myself.

Well you did stand up to him. You left.

So use that as the basis from which to deal with is uselessness and bullying tactics.

You won, you walked away. He still has to live with himself. Sad get that he sounds to be!

@CuriousaboutSamphire

Well you did stand up to him. You left.

So use that as the basis from which to deal with is uselessness and bullying tactics.

You won, you walked away. He still has to live with himself. Sad get that he sounds to be!

He's already onto the next one sadly - for her that is.

Ooh! A serial gobshite. Which of course YOU knew as well as the new woman does, he has previous kids.

He must be lovely when he is trying. Some men are!

Keep on, try not to be too hard on yourself.

@CuriousaboutSamphire

Ooh! A serial gobshite. Which of course YOU knew as well as the new woman does, he has previous kids.

He must be lovely when he is trying. Some men are!

Keep on, try not to be too hard on yourself.

Thank you - it's just so hard when you have lived it and you can't quite figure out if it's as bad as you think