to ask my dh to carry my 2 year old upstairs for me when he is about as I am pg?

[frostythesnowmum]

I'm only four months but showing lots and my lo is a handfull, when he's about I ask dh to do any carrying upstairs thats needed but he is very arsy about it and keeps reminding me that pg is not an illness am I being unreasonable or is this a fair request.
It's one flight of stairs and the staircase passes my dh and starts in the living room where he is usually sat on his arse

frosty, I don't know really. I never asked for help until I was about 6-7 months.

I'm not pregnant - I still expect my husband to do the carrying of anything heavy and he is tall and very fit (and I'm short and chubby)

he also does the 'reaching from tall shelves' whereas I get down and clean the floors (cos its closer for me)

No, you're not being unreasonable - if Ihad a two year my husband would be doing all the carrying (to save my back)

YANBU - I always ask DH to carry DS (2yo) and have been doing for ages - I am currently 28 weeks pg.

No, it is not an illness, but you are growing a whole new person and this is a tiny bit of help.

I'd be fuming if I was in your position. of course pg is not an illness but that doesn't mean he can't pull his weight and give you a bit of a rest. growing a baby can be very hard work...

I'm really bad at not picking the DC's up, I was the same when pg with ds, always picking DD up, now I'm forever picking DS up, just out of habit really. But, no you're not being unreasonable, doesn't matter how far pg you are you shouldn't really be lifting anything heavy.
PG is not an illness, no, but it is a condition, which allowances should be made for.

You don't need your hubby to carry LO up the stairs for you, but if he's about and doing nothing he should want to help out as much as he can.

Why is he carrying your 2 year old upstairs 'for ' you? Is the two year old from a previous relationship? If not, then he is carrying the two year old for the two year old, not for you.

read this and try it

Unless he wants a wife with a very slack fanny, he should do ALL the lifting.

Oh god that line is so familiar "Pregnancy is not an illness". It makes me see red frankly. The only people I've ever heard say it are men who being rampantly sexist as a means of undermining women.

Yuck.

And why for you and not for himself? Is he somehow exempt from household tasks including childcare? Is it like a form of diplomatic immunity? How did he qualify for this exemption? Was it through getting superglued to the sofa?

YANBU
Had a similar discussion with DP about him not wanting to 'lift' dd every night for her 9pm pee (in a vain attempt to stop her peeing the bed). 20 weeks this week and dd is 3 and about 16 kg.
He should be helping you, of course pregnancy isn't an illness, but you are entitled to expect help. DS is his son too!

Defo will try it coldtits - that is a great idea
The child is his he is just an arse at times noticably more so when I'm pregnant!
He also sat on his arse watching tv and did not offer to help whilst I was unloading all the Christmas food shop _ I'm still mad about that His defense was Halle Berry was coming out of the water (he was watching Bond).

I persume he is the little ones father, if so of course he should be pulling his weightparenting is a two person job. My now x husb was the same when I was preg with ds2 (only 16 month age gap). He wouldnt even change lo nappy at the weekend, as me changing the nappy involved me having a bucket next to to literally vomit into as changing as I was very sensitive to smells the first few months. Totally knobhead

Well you know, I blame the mothers.

If their mothers brought them up better then surely they would behave better/more sensibly/be more civilised etc.

A lesson for us all?

Well you know, I blame the mothers.

If their mothers brought them up better then surely they would behave better/more sensibly/be more civilised etc.

A lesson for us all?

True quattrocento my x's mother was a drunk and was a totally bitch to him, it so explains everything he has done

I'm 12 weeks pregnant and have a nearly 2yo and a 3 1/2 to look after too so hard work.

DP will tell me off for lifting anything heavy even though I'm hardly showing. When he's not here I have to lift hevay things but when he is around no I don't.

Tell him to get off his lazy arse and help you.

coldtits - you're me hero!

ermmm can the 2yr old not go up the stairs themselves?? When pg with dd2 dd1 who was 3mths when I got pg used to crawl up the stairs and I walked behind her. Same for ds when I was expecting dd1. DD2 now makes her own way up the stairs and she is 11mths.

However if you really need to carry 2yr old up for whatever reason then yes YANBU your dh should shift his butt and help.

Very true Quattro. When I was pg, my FIL told my dh that he would have to do all the heavy work and lifting (dh is one of 9 so FIL knows a thing or two about having a pg wife). So dh has been well trained.

YANBU - you should not have to ask. These are his children too.

YANBU. Does he not want to help you out and save you from physical pain/tiredness? He should stop being so bloody selfish.

ds does go up and down himself when he wants to trouble is this does not usually match when I want him to ie. bed time and bath time. He is very willfull and will tantrum when not getting his own way so often it is carrying him kicking and screaming