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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think my neighbour stole my laptop?

568 replies

StarWa · 15/01/2022 19:35

This is going to sound a bit ridiculous, but I promise it's true, unless I've lost my mind.

I went away for three weeks. During this time I asked my NDN to look after my cat - I left all the food, litter, poo bags etc.

I offered them £10 per day to do this, however, they refused and said I could repay the favour one day. We are quite friendly, she's a teacher and he works for a bank - both late thirties. Not that it matters, just so I'm not dripfeeding.

I take in a lot of Amazon deliveries for them and they would do the same for me.

I got home today and my laptop is gone - I always keep it in the same place on my desk. It was 100% there before I left. Thinking they might have moved it for whatever reason (fine) I text her to ask.

She told me I better not be accusing her of stealing it because she would never do that. I said I wasn't saying that at all, just a bit perplexed as I didn't take it with me.

Now she hasn't replied, but she's read my message.

OP posts:
butterpuffed · 20/01/2022 08:31

I don't see how it could be anyone who didn't have a key . How would a burglar gain entry with no trace and why take only a laptop . And would a burglar bother to take the charger. Really !

My only other idea is that you maybe just took it with you on your three weeks away !

MsAgnesDiPesto · 20/01/2022 08:44

@butterpuffed

I don't see how it could be anyone who didn't have a key . How would a burglar gain entry with no trace and why take only a laptop . And would a burglar bother to take the charger. Really !

My only other idea is that you maybe just took it with you on your three weeks away !

If the door was left unlocked by the neighbour on one occasion then anyone could have been in with no forced entry.
firstfamhol · 20/01/2022 09:57

You should drop it in that you found out you can look up the location remotely and see what she says?

Or even have a quick look on your local Facebook marketplace / eBay / gumtree etc to see if it’s listed.

Sparticuscaticus · 20/01/2022 09:58

Change your locks OP

I would
You can go to b&q and get a cheap barrel new lock or you can pay £80 for locksmith to change it. I know it costs then another £40 ish to get duplicate keys but I would.

It's unclear how laptop was stolen but it was. And you have other valuables in the house

Can't believe a teacher NDN didn't want to chat nor help you .... sounds well dodgy

grapewine · 20/01/2022 10:08

My mind is blown with how unconcerned you seem.

Emus · 20/01/2022 10:45

I'd have thought if she had taken it, she would have quickly realised it was crap as it died every time it was moved so quickly returned it before you got back from holiday! I hate mysteries like this, they make you doubt everything.

LemonTreeGrove · 20/01/2022 11:10

I can't see people risking a banking and teaching career for the sake of a laptop.
When you didn't update for 2 days I assumed you'd found the laptop but didnt like to admit it

DoTheyKnowItsLemonJuice · 20/01/2022 13:00

OP, please don’t be so passive about the fact that someone unknown has access to your home :/

Mollysocks · 20/01/2022 13:16

@LemonTreeGrove

I can't see people risking a banking and teaching career for the sake of a laptop. When you didn't update for 2 days I assumed you'd found the laptop but didnt like to admit it
You’d think but I used to work for one of the main 4 banks in the fraud section and a colleague literally ruined his career by stealing money from a Christmas raffle was found out and sacked. People do do stupid things.
LemonTreeGrove · 20/01/2022 16:08

You can understand someone stealing money if they've got into debt, but a laptop that doesn't work very well?

StarWa · 20/01/2022 17:45

I'm really not being passive about it, even if it comes across that way on here. I am concerned and freaked out. I've ordered one of those ring doorbell things.

OP posts:
GrannytoaUnicorn · 20/01/2022 18:47

@StarWa

I'm really not being passive about it, even if it comes across that way on here. I am concerned and freaked out. I've ordered one of those ring doorbell things.
You NEED to change your locks!!
GrannytoaUnicorn · 20/01/2022 18:47

You just need to change the barrel, it's not expensive at all

RenGreen · 20/01/2022 19:54

You may need to check your home insurance t&cs but I have read somewhere that giving your key to a 3rd party can invalidate your home insurance so perhaps do change your locks!

whynotwhatknot · 20/01/2022 20:33

Whatever the police say tell her that theyre looking into it

might make her nervous

milkyaqua · 20/01/2022 22:14

Being concerned and freaked out are mental and emotional states.

You have passively waited for your neighbour to not show up when she said she was coming over to talk. You have been busy working and doing other things and have not returned to the thread for days, meanwhile also letting things slide and not actively pursuing your neighbour for a face-to-face conversation. You have asked if you really need to change the locks. These are all passive behaviours.

Contacting the police was an active behaviour. The rest is incredibly passive. Your small attempts to pursue your neighbour for discussion on this have been... limp.

I would have changed the locks the day I noticed my laptop was gone, and my key-holding neighbour blew my concerns off.

StrangerThanSpring · 21/01/2022 04:13

@StarWa

I'm really not being passive about it, even if it comes across that way on here. I am concerned and freaked out. I've ordered one of those ring doorbell things.
I think that is a good choice!

Don't worry about the people demanding drama. It's your life. Do what feels right.

WhereTheresHope4 · 21/01/2022 04:29

Did you check where it was located through Microsoft?

MummyWoodentop · 21/01/2022 05:30

Could she have taken her child/ best friend/ neighbour in to the house with her for some reason and they took it but deny it.

MummyWoodentop · 21/01/2022 05:39

This link says you can log into your Gmail account and see any recent usage.
fossbytes.com/find-lost-stolen-laptop/

FirstTimeSecondTime · 21/01/2022 07:00

She had the keys and was responsible for your property. If she gave someone the keys/left a windiw or four open, whatever, it is her responsibility.

Pootlepoodle · 21/01/2022 07:52

You have passively waited for your neighbour to not show up when she said she was coming over to talk. You have been busy working and doing other things and have not returned to the thread for days, meanwhile also letting things slide and not actively pursuing your neighbour for a face-to-face conversation

Lol! Berating the OP for not coming back on the thread! Hahahahahaha

peridito · 21/01/2022 08:45

Quite Pootlepoodle -how very dare the OP not meet the expectations and perceived "norm" of all MN users.

burnoutbabe · 21/01/2022 08:55

I'd want to talk to the neighbors just to see

Had they seen it in room x at any time.

In which case you know it was left out. Then did they do any tidying on that room and could have moved it by accident (in a pile of paperwork /books)

NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 21/01/2022 09:07

Where in the house is your desk/the laptop OP.

If I was left in charge of feeding a cat/the responsibility of securing someone's home on a daily basis for a matter of weeks, AND the laptop was clearly visible to anyone looking through a window (assuming it was somewhere downstairs), I'd probably have hidden it from view.

What is your NDN's official response on this, or have you not really properly caught up with her?

Forgive me (I have not read the full thread)

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