To struggle with meal planning this much?

[Freecuthbert]

I'm a good cook and enjoy it, but I find meal planning hard work, can't really get my head around it. I have to research recipes and work out the right amount of ingredients for our household, write a list of what we need. But once I go through all that, pick what we want that week etc, it all ends up as odd bits of this and that ingredient and just not feasible at all. The food shop would cost me a bloody fortune! So then I have to try and whittle it down and plan the meals strategically so they share ingredients etc so things don't go to waste and I'm not overspending. It takes me hours tbh... I feel like I'm doing it all wrong.

I can't even look in my cupboard at bits and think up of meals out of that. I'm rubbish at remembering recipes as well! I have to look everything up, it's a nightmare. We're not the kind of family who could eat the same meals week in week out. If we ate the same thing every week I'd go right off it. We have some tried and tested favourites but they're more monthly than weekly if anything... wouldn't be favourites anymore if had more often than that tbh. And we love trying new things often.

I'm using gousto at the moment for 4 days a week because of this, so I only have 3 days a week to struggle with meal planning. But those 3 days now end up being a cop out. Mixture of fending for ourselves out of the freezer, takeaway, dinner at family's, quick stir fry, steak and chips, picky bits. We just have one child who is 12 months old, so it's easy to sort something out for her dinner when I'm not cooking properly... don't worry she doesn't have to cook a frozen pizza for herself or tuck into a medium rare steak!

Is it really meant to be this difficult? Or am I meant to just suck it up and have a set rota of meals that simplifies things (but loses a lot of joy for us), or spend hours on meticulous meal planning? Is there a secret app that basically plans all our meals and creates a shopping list? Honestly I don't mind cooking from fresh every night as long as the food is tasty and not monotonous.

Would love to shave some money off our food bill tbh, we are low income but not struggling and I'm frugal with lots of other things.

The way you plan sounds exhausting and really hard work.

I tend to base my plan around the weekend and let whatever is left from that inspire the rest of the week.

So for example this week we are having a beef and ale stew.
I have the dry ingredients (stock, herbs etc in the cupboard.)

I need to buy beef, onions, carrots, smoked bacon, mushrooms, parsnips, potatoes and green beans.
I'll make double quantities of stew and we'll have it as a pie later in the week, so I need pastry.

So I need to use up the rest of those ingredients in other meals:

The mushrooms and pastry will go in a tart with goat's cheese and rosemary. So I need to add goat's cheese to my list. And salad to go with it.

The rest of the smoked bacon can go in a pasta dish - carbonara this week. I can have the rest of the salad with it, and I need to add eggs and pecorino or Parmesan to the list.

I still have carrots and parsnips. I could keep them until next week, or make a soup, maybe with some garlic and pecorino croutons, and the rest of the rosemary.

Now I've got 5 meals planned with limited effort.
Something from the freezer for the 6th and 7th, or we might get a takeaway, or just have a toasted sandwich.

By struggling to look at bits in the cupboard and make up something from that, I mean I can't just look at what's in the cupboard or fridge and instinctively know what to cook, I'd need to look up a recipe. But then I have to find a recipe for stuff that I already have in. And then there might be ingredients I'm missing. Basically idk how people balance it all out so they're using everything up each week, not left with half a packet of this and that etc. Without either a) having set meals or b) spending ages meal planning.

Of course my 12 month old doesn't care what I cook. It's both me and my partner really who don't like the monotony, and really not a fan of the typical British family meals unless it's occasional (spag bol, cottage pie, lasagne, tikka masala, meat and two veg, roast dinner). Of course he could share the job of meal planning but then we'd have two equally confused people making a pig's ear of it as he's just as bad as me. But at the moment he's working and I'm not (been on mat leave, too unwell to go back at the moment, will be working full time when my health situation is resolved), so it just makes sense for me to take on more housework and life admin type stuff. And I'm the one who enjoys the cooking plus it means he has to do the washing up

Maybe it's something I just need to suck up though and go boring and simple! Tbh before settling down my line of work always provided meals, and outside work I was out having meals with friends and living it up basically. I'm not cut out for this kind of life I suppose!

I am exhausted just reading your posts. When I was at your stage of life I bought M&S tray meals like the Chicken Provincial, packet rice and veg. Job done. The main goes in the oven for 25 mins and the microwave rice and veg done in 2 minutes. Your standards are too high !

sorted.club/home/

Maybe this would help? It’s basically a choice menus each week with 3 to 5 days worth of meals, with the shopping list done for you. All the meals are planned to use up all of the ingredients from the shopping list, to eliminate waste. Different menus every week so doesn’t get boring! You do have to pay but it’s only a few pounds a month I think (my husband is the one with the account so I’m not sure exactly how much) but it sounds like exactly what you’re looking for so might be worth it! There’s also a free trial if you want to try it out before committing. Hopefully this helps

I recommend narrowing the choices op, or it gets too bewildering!

Sunday: roast + trimmings
Monday: leftovers from Sunday + salad or veg
Tues: rice or pasta dish + veg
Wed: tray bake (sausages or chicken) + veg
Thurs: totally veggie
Fri: fish
Sat: takeaway or fakeaway

Then choose 8 recipes within those categories; 4 for winter and 4 for summer (and you can add 4 for spring & autumn if you are really enthusiastic! )

HTH!

I dont understand why you need to search recipes all the time? Do you have meals that you can cook from top of your head? Can you do variants of a meal depending on what you have in the fridge? Do you often cook meals that need special ingredients that you need just for that one meal?
Do you come from a family where you had home-cooked meal or is it something you are learning from the very start?
Do you need to buy your food weekly? Could you not shop more often to spread the mental load of it all?

I'm genuinely struggling to understand how you even remember what you are last week nevermind 4 weeks ago. I do think you've set a high standard for yourself having some many different meals over the month. We genuinely eat some kind of lasagna/bolognese/chilli each week, they're made pretty much exactly the same up until a few key moments/ingredients.

I think you need to learn to be more flexible with your cooking, most recipes are intended to be guidelines. If you don't have fresh herbs use dried, swap beef for chicken etc. Don't feel you need to stick to a recipe if you already have a good substitute at home.

I think if you really want to make things easier for yourself you're going to have to repeat your tried and tested meals more often than once a month and learn to tweak them so they're just different enough.

@user135747958 thank you so much! It does sound like what I was asking for I'm going to check that out and see if it works for us. Even if it costs a couple quid, it could save us far more long term by slashing food bill.

Why not keep a track of back to back recipes - eg recipes that have similar ingredients so not wasting food. You could link them all together - might take some time to set up but then you know what to buy, just choose 2-3 recipes which have similar ingredients

When you say "left with half a packet of this and that" - are you meaning stuff that has to be stored in the fridge and will go off within a few days? If so, fair enough you have a point.
If you mean dry goods, you can just reseal the packet with a peg or clip or bit of Sellotape and put in in the cupboard. Or decant into a jar or container.
Or, with many fresh-chilled foods the remaining half can be frozen - check the label.
It sounds like you don't actually store any food?

If you find a recipe which uses up the remains of a packet of something, but you don't have one of the other ingredients, then just improvise - leave that ingredient out, or put a substitute in - from the freezer or store cupboard (because you should have lots of different things stored.) Improvisation and substitution is the art of cooking meals.

I believe it is government advice that every household should have a minimum of three weeks of food stored, in case of emergencies like getting snowed-in, cut off by floods, terror attacks, petrol strikes, sudden lock-downs due to pandemics... etc.

@katepilar

I dont understand why you need to search recipes all the time? Do you have meals that you can cook from top of your head? Can you do variants of a meal depending on what you have in the fridge? Do you often cook meals that need special ingredients that you need just for that one meal? Do you come from a family where you had home-cooked meal or is it something you are learning from the very start? Do you need to buy your food weekly? Could you not shop more often to spread the mental load of it all?

No, I can't retain any recipes in my head. And I struggle with conceptualising meals based on ingredients.

My mum always did home-cooked meals growing up, and she cooked a variety and was always trying lots of new things. But she always seemed to put not that much effort into thinking up and picking recipes, it just seemed instinctive to her!

How have you ended up with ingredients in your fridge / cupboard that you can’t use if you need exact recipes for everything ?

Tesco gives away a free booklet every month which gives you a week's worth of bargain, fresh family recipes, with exact shopping lists and ways to turn one day's dinner recipe/ingredients into the start of something different for the next day.

I often cook in batches and freeze the rest for another day (s)

I live alone so understand the problem of left over ingredients but over time I have developed many strategies that mean I eat a varied diet without repeating the same meals all the time or throwing stuff out.

It’s good to have a repertoire of quick meals that are good for using up the odds and ends in the fridge. E.g. stir fry, omelette, frittata, pasta with veg and cheese, soups and stews, tray bake of some kind of protein plus veg, noodles and veg in a miso broth. I normally have one of this kinds of meals each week.

I don't understand why you can't have some standard 'staples'.

So each week, pick up a pack of mince, a pack of chicken breast etc..... your mince you can rotate lasagne / cottage pie / bolognaise / chilli so you go a full month without repeating just from that one protein. Then same with your chicken....build up a list of about 6 things you can make simply with it, and you no longer have to search out recipes every day. Then so it goes on.

@LeaveYourHatOn

How have you ended up with ingredients in your fridge / cupboard that you can’t use if you need exact recipes for everything ?

Oh my gosh, clearly I meant I go through the rigorous meal planning to avoid that happening, as that is what happens when I don't do that. But at the moment gousto is taking care of that problem for me 4 days a week and I'm half arsing it the other 3 but wish I could just cook lovely varied meals from scratch 7 days a week and not have to deal with meal planning which I struggle with.

I think one of the key things when following a recipe is to see it as a guide rather than something that has to be rigidly followed. Eg switching veg according to what you have available to you; using a bit more or less of something so that it won’t leave you with an annoying amount left over; using dried herbs instead of fresh; switching one fresh herb for another; or cooking extra and either freezing extra portions or having it for lunch the next day. I also keep note of recipes that pair together to use up ingredients. It might be weeks later that I decide I fancy making x again, but if I know from last time that I also made y and z to use up ingredients than the meal planning is a lot quicker.

I believe it is government advice that every household should have a minimum of three weeks of food stored, in case of emergencies like getting snowed-in, cut off by floods, terror attacks, petrol strikes, sudden lock-downs due to pandemics... etc.

I don't think it's standard to have the storage space (or money) to always have at least 3 weeks worth of breakfast, lunch and dinners surplus knocking about your house in addition to your normal food shop surely?

We all have to compromise, don't we?
I think about who will be in firstly .
Then what time I will be home from work ie , how much time to prepare.
Then whether DS1 or DH will be requiring leftovers for their meals lunch.
My family are very unfussy but everyone has their preferences which I try to take into account.
We are usually 3 or 4 adults.
The other thing I take into account is whether someone will decide to go out last minute; this is usually on a Friday so I tend to go for a scratch type meal that can adapt easily and won't use expensive ingredients.
LAstly , I usually only plan for 6 days so that there is some flexibility and Saturday can then be something special bought on the day or something treaty like pizza , takeaway or steak.
So then we might have a roast chicken one day, soup from carcass the next, a vegetarian curry with rice the next, roasted veg the next +/- salmon,, pasta eg puttanesca/ Norma , omelette on Friday and back to Saturday( shell fish paella tonight with ingredients from the freezer).
I like trying new things and if they go well I write them in a little book, but I realistically only try something new every 1-2 weeks and have a regular set of about 30 or 40 meals that pop up again and again .

Batch Lady is helpful.
My friend has a rolling 6 week meal plan, a lot of effort in the beginning but works well for her! Then you can make a second one too and keep adding etc

@yikesanotherbooboo
Oh I like your set up. Maybe I should try and build up a repertoire of 30-40 recipes, then there won't be so much monotony but still have set meals to pick from, with something new thrown in occasionally. But I guess it's not an overnight job and learnt over some years. It sounds ideal to me though

@Kudupoo

Batch Lady is helpful. My friend has a rolling 6 week meal plan, a lot of effort in the beginning but works well for her! Then you can make a second one too and keep adding etc

Never heard of batch lady, definitely going to look into that as well. Sounds useful!

@freecuthbert and @user135747958 - look up the resourceful cook, sounds pretty similar yo the site you linked, but it's free!

@EnterFunnyNameHere thank you so much! For some reason the website isn't working for me right now, but will try it again later.

Oh no, hope it resolves (or we might starve to death )