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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Argument with neighbour

7 replies

lunalovegreat · 14/01/2022 15:24

My neighbour is an abusive alcoholic nutjob. I have had a couple of run ins with him, once when our dogs barked and he came into the pub in the village and screamed at my husband calling him a cunt and a dick head, we went and got cctv at that point to se if the dogs were making a nuisance, hundreds of pounds later we have hours of footage of our dogs sleeping however it did pick up a dog barking but it was his other neighbour on the other side.. Hmm no apology.

Then he took it upon himself to complain that our log burner was making his kid sick. The log burner that hasn't been on for 5 months.. I had to send him a photo with the time and date of the photo of the burner off before he stopped texting me. Turns out it was his neighbour on the other side burning stuff in their garden and he had the windows open..

About a week ago he asked me to make sure the shared gate is closed because our other neighbour is complaining it was banging in the wind, fair enough I said I would. Last night I must have not closed it properly as the lock is really stiff, he walked past it from the pub and hammered on the door screaming that I'm a fat retard and fucking cunt. I called the police and they had a word with him, they've also referred him to social services because he was so drunk and his kid was in the house.

Aibu to get a protection from harassment order, and to block him on everything? he's an absolute state. He's in sole charge of a child and is drunk and abusive all the time. He doesn't own his home, we do. It's a bit more complicated than just going to his landlord though as he technically doesn't have one, he's living in the house of his dead partner and it's owned by her family. Aibu to contact them and tell them how awful he is to live with and how concerned I am about his behaviour considering his child is there 90% of the time?

I don't care if this is outing

OP posts:
ImSureISaidNo · 14/01/2022 15:32

Ynbu

Offmyfence · 14/01/2022 15:35

I think you should be contacting them without delay if he is not taking proper care of his child or they are in anyway suffering mental or physical harm due to his drinking.

2Gen · 14/01/2022 15:36

YANBU. This sounds horrible for ye, I'm sorry OP. I think ye do need to do something about this man's behaviour. If I were you, I'd go to Citizen's Advice first to find out how best to go about it but, if his behaviour escalates in any way, especially if he scares you, I'd call the police. I also think there's a Child Protection issue here as, if he's an alcoholic, he is abusing his child, as there is bound to be neglect of the child's needs plus if he is aggressive to neighbours he's likely to be aggressive to his child, maybe even more aggressive than he is to ye. If you call Social Services it might escalate his aggression towards you as he already seems to be blaming ye for everything without checking first, so that takes me back to calling on Citizen's advice first.
This can't go on, for his child's sake even more than yours. Good luck OP, I feel for you, alcoholics can be nightmares!

Mrgrinch · 14/01/2022 15:37

Have you actually made any reports about the welfare of the child? That would be me main concern.

Bubblesandsqueak1 · 14/01/2022 15:46

Contacting family no contacting social services yes

Cattitudes · 14/01/2022 15:46

If he was coming back from the pub I would be concerned about who had been looking after his child as well during that time. It sounds as if he needs more support and supervision.

lunalovegreat · 14/01/2022 15:52

@Mrgrinch I've made countless referrals to social services. They're not interested. I mean they are now that he was violent and the police have made a referral, but I don't think any of the reports I had made previously made a blind bit of difference

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