She often comments as though its a bad thing that my kids have nice clothes. One of my DDs is less than a year older than hers and she 'bagsies' my DD's outfits while she's wearing them.
DD was born during the first lockdown and I had barely any newborn clothes and they were tricky to get hold of. There was also a family bereavement so online scouring wasn't my priority. Fortunately, I had a friend, who pretty much kitted me out with a newborn wardrobe.
This friend had a baby a similar time to SIL. I had a huge bag of baby clothes by this point to share between them - all good clothes in pristine condition. I gave the bag to SIL to choose some as her baby was first. I was then going to give the rest to my friend.
SIL was fully aware of this but she took the vast majority of them. I was a bit gutted but didn't make a fuss. I just bought my friend some more instead.
I've always bought things that I like and are good quality and I sell them on and put the money towards the next thing. I do buy second hand when there's something I really want. It's the way I've always been, I do it with my own clothes, my wedding dress, my furniture etc. I do it with certain kids items.
SIL did most of her baby things with hand-me-downs and charity shops, it's not a circumstances thing, she earns a decent amount. We're just very different. If she spots that we have something thats obviously expensive she comments and rolls her eyes.
I don't like the way she turns her nose up at the money I spend and then expects to directly benefit from it.
She's recently asked for two things. One is something we bought and the other is something PILs actually bought on our request when DD was born.
Am I obliged to give her what PIL bought? The plan would have been to sell on and put the money towards the next car seat.