My friends don't want to be friends..

[bellalou1234]

I've had funny few months where all my friends have dried up so to speak. I've tried reaching out but no firm plans are ever made. Anyway a few months ago I seen on fb 2 of my friends were on a long walk, I would have jumped at the chance, it's something we've done before. I messaged and said hey next time I'll come. They've had a couple more walks meet ups no invite. I messaged one of the friends last week and she was like were going walking tomorrow you want to come, then she text to cancel in morning. Turns out they've been walking again today.. this is so childish but I'm so hurt...

It is shit. Delete your social media- you won't regret it. Secondly, although it hurts now you will get over it. I had a friend who clearly didn't want to be my friend. I ditched her cold turkey and my life improved. I made other friends who I went on holiday with and I wasn't having to chase them etc. It was so much better. Good luck.

This is so sad.

I think sometimes in a group of friends, there can be a “bad egg” who dictates everything and everyone. “I won’t go if so and so won’t go”

but what Rodin says is true. Not being for you doesn’t always equate being against you…
This is so so true.

One of them might be struggling with something and not up to a larger group meet.
You may have said something which has caused upset?
All your friends have disappeared is quite odd .

Social media used too really effect my mental health. Deleting it first was hard as I was so used to just constantly going on there for the sake of it. But I feel so much better for doing it. Why not join a walking group or download the meet up app to meet new people lol go would like to do similar activity's!

Or not lol 🤦‍♀️

Delete your social media- you won't regret it
That is not necessarily true.
It doesn't have to be all or nothing. Just hide the friends or unfollow them. Theres no need to cut off your nose to spite your face, especially if you like SM.

Gullygawk she said something flippant like I didn't get to get till 2 so won't be going

Op thats lousy. Was doing a walking thing 3 us. She was busy busy. I said grand. Then photos up on FB of nights out. I felt I was making a fool of myself so I do alot alone now. Find women so cliquey if Im honest

Sorry if I sound like a mean girl here and I haven't met up with friends for months and months now, but when on FB two of us said something like we must meet up in the spring, another person piped up with "me too, me too" and my heart sank. There are things I can't discuss with the third person there for various reasons and it alters the dynamic. I'm not saying that I never want to meet with the 3rd person, but I would like to meet with just the second person from time to time too.

I had a thread similar to this recently. It really hurts doesn't it!
I see a lot of people proclaiming proudly how they've cut people out of their lives recently...I would hate to think I was one of these "toxic" friends who needed culling...don't think I am, and I'm sure you're not either OP. I just wish people would think before excluding others

I don't particularly like walking with more than 1 person. You can't walk 3 abreast, someone is always left out of the conversation at times, and if I'm with one really good friend and other so-so friend I don't get to have the "let it all out" conversation with my really good friend.

And, everyone has a different speed, some like to stroll, others power walk, and others are somewhere in the middle.....

But @ClaryFairchild this is the kind of thing I'm talking about...May not be entirely perfect for you, but could you not make that compromise so that person 3 isn't excluded?

I find friendships go in and out, especially since I’ve been a mother. Eg over Christmas working flat out, hosted two sets of family, daughter had a big show so was socialising in that group and didn’t have any time left to see anyone else. Now that’s over I’m reconnecting with other friends. If I had got hurt of offended that people did to me what I often accidentally do to them, I would be worse off. You’ve had some good advice but I wouldn’t delete them. A few months from now, you’ll all be friends again. It might be they are enjoying being close now and don’t want company. That’s OK, although I can see it really sucks from your pov. All the more reason to meet some new people, take up some new hobbies and live your life.