Really weird kids’ books from the past

[aweebitlost]

I was reading the DC The Elephant & the Bad Baby tonight and it struck me how very odd it is.

An elephant takes a baby for a joyride to nick a load of food and then everyone is cross with the baby for not saying please?!

Then there’s the Long Slide with the 3 stuffed animals that climb a giant slide, vomit, meet some witches etc and don’t seem to get any pleasure out of the experience.

AIBU or were some kids’ books from the past plain bizarre?! Any other good ones people can think of?

Not now bernard anyone remember it. It was about parents ignorimg a kid and then a monster ate it….

@Earthrocknroll Conrad, the factory-made boy movie:

@ Wisewordswouldhelp yes! I loved the wolf and the seven kids. Thanks for reminding me of it. And my grandmother had Struuwelpeter - terrifying tales with morals for children. I lay in bed at night dreading the ‘long red legged scissor man’ who would chop off you thumbs if you sucked them! 😳

@AngelinaFibres

Flat Stanley. Seem to remember he was squashed flat and then sent somewhere in the post.

A bulletin board fell on him.

@Cheeseandlobster

Marvin Wanted More. Ds used to love it. A sheep is hungry so it eats the whole world. Then it realises it is lonely so it vomits it all back up again and everything is good again albeit a bit upside down

🤣🤣

Used to love Not Now Bernard.

Babapapa was delightfully odd. A childhood favourite.

@Nonevernotever I think I read most of her books but Candle and Lamp were the only ones I owned so they are the ones I can clearly remember as I reread them often.

The Shrinking of Treehorn. Utterly bizarre snd hilarious.

I read Each Peach Pear Plum endlessly when the DC were young... and yes, there's something odd about it, but I still can't figure what.

Here's my nemesis - again one that I read all the time - and then read an interview with someone in a Sunday Newspaper magazine (I think) - about The Tiger Who Came To Tea.

And the interviewee said that she didn't like it because it was about a paedophile.

It's bothered me ever since. Any thoughts???

I loved the Rainbow Fish when I was little but now it makes me cross

The Hobyahs!

This frightened me **less as a kid! It really upset me that the Old Man cut up his dog to stop him barking. Who writes a story like that for children? The copy I had drawings of dog limbs on a shelf!

www.scaryforkids.com/hobyahs/

Una and Grubstreet by Prudence Andrews

About a very young girl who kidnaps a neighbours baby and hides out in another neighbours empty house. I actually bought it and re read it recently - it was v compelling with loads of layers that I missed when I was 8.

@Luckingfovely

I read Each Peach Pear Plum endlessly when the DC were young... and yes, there's something odd about it, but I still can't figure what.

Here's my nemesis - again one that I read all the time - and then read an interview with someone in a Sunday Newspaper magazine (I think) - about The Tiger Who Came To Tea.

And the interviewee said that she didn't like it because it was about a paedophile.

It's bothered me ever since. Any thoughts???

I hate the Tiger who came to Tea. Not because I'd ever thought it was about paedophiles but because I just don't get what the hell it is about. To me it's too mundane to be fun/quirky/interesting, if it's supposed to convey some sort of message, moral or meaning it's too obscure for anyone I've ever know to get. I know Judith Kerr and her family fled Nazi Germany and I have seen suggestions that the Tiger = Hitler but the Tiger isn't particularly scary and doesn't get any comeuppance to make that theory hang together.

Haaaaaa I saw the title and was going to comment The Elephant and the Bad Baby! Utterly bizarre but in my experience kids absolutely love it! I have memories of being read it at playgroup and not questioning it at all, but coming back to it as an adult I can only conclude the author was on glue

Oooh and there was one I read in Year 3/4 (I was a good reader so might have been meant for older kids) about a boy who was hideously injured in a car crash (see...almost definitely meant for older readers ) and so he was rebuilt by doctors with all these 'extras'. Including the ability to wee out of his finger. Which proved really useful in a traffic jam but he had to do it subtly as he was in the car with his friend and their parents and they didn't know about all his 'adjustments' so he opened the window a crack and poked his finger out and found relief.

I mean...wtf? Do remember thinking it would be bloody handy to be able to do that though

Luckingfovely that interested me. I loved The tiger who came to tea and so did my kids, have never heard of any link to paedophilia? Tell me more!

Polly and the Wolf books were weird when I look back.

@isittimetogotobed mine find that hilarious, a friend bought them the flaming stuffed toy of it....complete with little felt turd on head!

@samsmum2

Luckingfovely that interested me. I loved The tiger who came to tea and so did my kids, have never heard of any link to paedophilia? Tell me more!

There isn’t any link!

I know Judith Kerr and her family fled Nazi Germany and I have seen suggestions that the Tiger = Hitler but the Tiger isn't particularly scary and doesn't get any comeuppance to make that theory hang together.
Judith Kerr also denied there was any link between the tiger and Hitler.

My kids also loved Goodnight Moon, it was often read on repeat - but I found the colour palette and odd perspective rather ominous.
I fucking HATE Goodnight Moon: “Goodnight nobody” on the blank page is nihilistic as fuck.

Not Now Bernard: allegedly it’s canon that Bernard IS the monster but I refuse this interpretation; he’s eaten by the monster, thank you.

My parents have two copies of Phoebe and the Hot Water Bottles so I’m pretty excited to buy a double-fronted mansion with the proceeds by selling them on Abe Books.

Tiger Who Came to Tea: Judith Kerr is on record as saying it’s not an allegory or metaphor about anything, it’s about a tiger who ate all the tea because he was hungry. Apparently she was a legend and the last one standing at her publisher’s Christmas parties.

Burglar Bill is pretty odd – so chill about baby abandonment, widowhood, kidnap, burglary…

A book of monsters. Can’t remember the title but there was one who could sit on walls and fences even if they were covered in glass.

It would be so frustrating to be an author who writes an innocent story about a friendly tiger coming to tea and eating all the food because, well, he's hungry, and have it misconstrued as being about paedophiles or Nazis! It reminds me of an autobiography I read once where the guy wrote a poem about a flower he happened to notice, and everyone was analysing it as being about spousal abuse or the dying planet or 'life itself' - it was literally just about a flower!! I swear these people don't really believe the writing is about the bizarre themes they come up with, they just want the attention they draw by suggesting it.

Innocent author of toddler book: 'A is for Apple'

Someone Somewhere: 'Oh my God, there's cyanide in apple pips! What does this MEAN?! It must be that this person is secretly influencing our children to self-harm by ingesting poison! Let's write lengthy articles and have TV debates about that!

Anyway, back to the question! I can't think of any at the mo but my parents are going to get my old childhood picture books out at some point so I'll have to revisit this thread then!

Oh I'd forgotten about John Burningham - we had Tarquin the Fox and Humbert and Mr Firkin, I loved them! Were they weird?

We also had Struwwelpeter, and my brother and I were so terrified of the long red-legged scissor man that we had to skip that page! The morality tales back then really were something else...! But I did buy a copy for my kids when they came along. I can't say they were that keen but it's still on our bookshelf.....

Z for zachariah!