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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To absolutely HATE New York

993 replies

GreetingsFromVenus · 10/01/2022 01:01

Dreamed of going there for many years. Thought it would be amazing. Everyone seems to think it is.

Here now and I hate it. Extortionate prices, rude ignorant locals, so many aggressive beggars. mentally ill people shouting in the street. loads of homeless people. The subway stations are disgusting and feel very menacing compared to London.

I find it really depressing actually and feel that the way Hollywood has portrayed New York is all smoke and mirrors. It is nothing special at all IMO. In fact it has a LOT of social issues and it made me feel quite sick to be spending $100 just for a mid range meal for 2 (no dessert) while there were people asking for food outside.

Central Park - pffttt!

Cannot wait to get home next week and will never complain about London prices again!

Anyone else felt the same?

OP posts:
MangoLipstick · 11/01/2022 22:10

My DH and I have loved NY everytime we’ve been. Each time a different season but Spring was my favourite.

I don’t think the last couple of years have been kind to NY, it’s definitely not representative of the NY I know and love.

LoudSnoringDog · 11/01/2022 22:13

I found it to be an amazing experience. Went in June 2018 and it was boiling. Have just booked to go back in December this year

Ericaequites · 11/01/2022 22:19

Outside of New York, 15-20% is expected. New Yorkers are greedy and rude. There is nothing there there.

Blackberrycream · 11/01/2022 22:31

@jobling

NY made me really appreciate how much London has to offer. I really didn't get NY, it was all 'meh' not much architecture, Central Park, yep it's a park, the tipping thing pissed me off, why would you tip for bad food and service and that was 15 year's ago!
I’m not sure what you mean by architecture but that is a really, really strange observation.
Kanaloa · 11/01/2022 22:35

@Ericaequites

Outside of New York, 15-20% is expected. New Yorkers are greedy and rude. There is nothing there there.
Wow have you met all of them? You must have been there ages.

Every single person in New York, in every single borough, is greedy and rude. Or as mil would say ‘everyone was awful? What did they all have in common?’

Thisisourplace2021 · 11/01/2022 22:41

I have just came back from NY went just before Christmas for 5 days for my daughters 15th. We loved it, cabbie was fab and pointed out all the sights driving from the airport. Walked everywhere, took the subway nearly everyday, skating in Central Park and walking across Brooklyn Bridge were my favourite parts. I am a Londoner and I don’t think you can compare the two cities or any cities really, they are all unique like the people who live in them. But yeah it was very expensive, the tipping slightly ridiculous and immigration was awful.

MissConductUS · 11/01/2022 22:41

Central Park is just that, a park. A nice big one. They're all just parks.

Central Park also has a zoo. It's not huge, but it's an absolute gem.

centralparkzoo.com

Pallisers · 11/01/2022 22:48

@Ericaequites

Outside of New York, 15-20% is expected. New Yorkers are greedy and rude. There is nothing there there.
I can't speak for the rest of the country but 15% would be considered very stingy in Boston. Even my kids know to tip at least 20% and understand that if they can't afford the tip, they can't afford the meal and should chose another restaurant.
Serrina · 11/01/2022 22:49

Try Boston or Chicago next time, the people are generally friendly and its less expensive

AllThePogs · 11/01/2022 22:52

Honestly, zoos are horrible. It has shocked me how many people are saying this is a good place to visit. It is a very small zoo with snow leopards and other animals that need far more space than they get in this small zoo.
It is not my idea of a fun day out to visit unhappy animals kept in enclosures that are too small.

HarrietsweetHarriet · 11/01/2022 22:54

I thought it was something about me that immigration didn't like. Going through the security scanners I very politely explained I had some hand blown glass made by my cousin that I was bringing home. The staff took my carry on bag, put it through the scanner and held me back while we all watched my bag go through, down the conveyor belt and fall to the floor with a sickening crunch at which point they smirked and said ' you can go through now'. Despite being carefully bubble wrapped, only one glass bowl survived intact. They were gifts for my family and I was so upset and angry but could say nothing.
Never again.

ArchibaldsDaddy · 11/01/2022 22:57

Been to New York twice: once in the summer once in the winter.

Enjoyed it both times, but was realistic about expectations - the slight brashness of New Yorkers is just part of the experience.

Here’s my top tip instead: Warsaw.

AllThePogs · 11/01/2022 23:08

@HarrietsweetHarriet that is heartbreaking. Bastards.

EightWheelGirl · 11/01/2022 23:23

This reminds me that somebody told me the other day that there's so much human feces in San Fran that they now have an app telling you which streets to avoid.

Chocolatehamper · 11/01/2022 23:26

Went there 20 years ago, never felt the want or need to go back. Stick to seeing what you want in films, much better than the real experience.

knitnerd90 · 12/01/2022 00:22

@Ericaequites

Outside of New York, 15-20% is expected. New Yorkers are greedy and rude. There is nothing there there.
I live near Washington DC. You are undertipping and your servers think you are cheap. 20-25% has become the norm in big cities.
ChrisConary · 12/01/2022 00:27

Next time, come to Las Vegas!

unname · 12/01/2022 00:29

@ComtesseDeSpair

I still don’t get all the comments about Central Park Confused It’s a large and well appointed park, just like Hyde Park or Regent’s Park (or even Hampstead Heath.) Surely like all of those it’s a nice place to walk around and experience a bit of calm in the middle of a hectic city? What were people expecting of a park?
Perhaps they were expecting: a boat pond with model boats an ice skating rink horse drawn carriages Alice in Wonderland statues An homage to John Lennon Row boats Rocks, Hills, water falls A zoo A botanical garden A historic barn And for it to be flanked by world class museums

Come to think of it I suspect OP wasn’t in Central Park at all. Hmm

PlantingTulips · 12/01/2022 00:30

Hell hole.

PlantingTulips · 12/01/2022 00:44

@Tas1984

I disagree. My experience was completely different. I was dazzled when I first saw Times Square at night. Met amazing people and had a fab time. I live in London so used to big cities and it reminded me of home but obviously on a much larger scale. It helps when you have amazing people you know there like I did to show you not just touristy places but how everyday people live. Going back this year and can’t wait!
How is it on a much larger scale than London? 🤣 NY actually has a slightly smaller population than London.
PlantingTulips · 12/01/2022 00:48

@SquirrelG

Quite the nerve to go somewhere and accuse the local people of being 'rude and ignorant.'

I agree, and as I said in an earlier post I find that how people treat you often depends on your attitude to them! Anyone hearing the OP's moaning and whinging is hardly likely to respond in a good way. I really think she should go on a package tour to somewhere which is sanitised for tourists - real life seems a bit too much for her delicate sensibilities.

People from NY are known all over the world for being rude and abrupt. I mean, they're Americans so that's a given! At least people from NY usually have a sense of humour to go with it unlike many Americans. But to say Americans have a rude way of speaking and lack manners is hardly news, it's well known? They just have a very rude culture and speak to each other in a way that would never be considered acceptable in most of Europe, so obviously is a culture shock for European visitors. Even more so for people from countries like Japan where politeness is even more central to the culture. This is just a fact of differences in cultural norms surely.
PrincessNutella · 12/01/2022 01:03

Unname—
Or perhaps they were expecting
an ancient Egyptian obelisk
A Victorian gothic castle
Formal conservatory garden
a 100 acre lake that contains a billion gallons of water
58 miles of curving pedestrian paths, almost none of which are straight.
A statue to honor a noble sled dog who saved an Alaskan village
an open-air Shakespeare theatre,
an old fashioned Merry-Go-Round
a band shell,
many athletic playing fields and children’s playgrounds, several fountains, There are also a police station, several blockhouses dating from the early 19th century, and several restaurants, etc.--
But--nothing to see, carry on

PlantingTulips · 12/01/2022 01:15

@PrincessNutella

Unname— Or perhaps they were expecting an ancient Egyptian obelisk A Victorian gothic castle Formal conservatory garden a 100 acre lake that contains a billion gallons of water 58 miles of curving pedestrian paths, almost none of which are straight. A statue to honor a noble sled dog who saved an Alaskan village an open-air Shakespeare theatre, an old fashioned Merry-Go-Round a band shell, many athletic playing fields and children’s playgrounds, several fountains, There are also a police station, several blockhouses dating from the early 19th century, and several restaurants, etc.-- But--nothing to see, carry on
Very much doubt anybody would be expecting historic monuments or wonders of the ancient world in a country with 300 years of history. 😂
Kanaloa · 12/01/2022 01:17

People from NY are known all over the world for being rude and abrupt. I mean, they're Americans so that's a given! At least people from NY usually have a sense of humour to go with it unlike many Americans. But to say Americans have a rude way of speaking and lack manners is hardly news, it's well known? They just have a very rude culture and speak to each other in a way that would never be considered acceptable in most of Europe, so obviously is a culture shock for European visitors. Even more so for people from countries like Japan where politeness is even more central to the culture. This is just a fact of differences in cultural norms surely.

You sound so stupid.

There you go. From a European as well Shock

If you go to another country with a nasty and prejudiced attitude like this you won’t have a good time there. Americans are not a homogenous lump and if you’ve visited and found all the people you met rude then that reflects not on America but on YOU.

I’ve been there and met lots of lovely, polite people who were desperate to hear all about Europe and obliged in telling me about the different parts of the country they had been and were from. On hearing of a particular state we wanted to visit one lady made a point of telling us all about her visit there and where to go if we wanted to camp. People were friendly to our children and loved seeing their excitement and joy of seeing a new place. Because we were polite and friendly others were polite and friendly,

People are mostly mirrors. You don’t see them as they are but as you are. I’ll accept the occasional person is just a dick but if it’s everyone, then it’s you.

Kanaloa · 12/01/2022 01:19

And for what it’s worth I had no experience of Americans having a ‘rude culture.’ Quite the opposite in fact, everyone we met spoke to us so nicely. Of course we spoke to them politely too and didn’t give the impression we were looking down on their entire culture so I imagine that helped.

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