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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

The organised mum method

64 replies

NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 15:59

To ask if anyone has found TOMM useful and if so, do you use the journal, app or podcast?

I have started following on Facebook but there seems to be a lot of people saying their work either never stated or start often but never stick to it.

Is this worth trying?

Thanks

OP posts:
Original poster
NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 19:00

@eagerlywaitingfor

I'm sure it works - if you are organised enough to actually follow it, obviously.

It still irritates me though. Organised mum. Not organised dad, or family, or parent.

Mum. Organised mum.

Because mum has to be the default and be responsible for absolutely everything domestic, catering, household, child-related etc, doesn't she? Hmm

Sorry, but it does get on my tits.

That's a great point. I'm roping my husband in in this premise alone Grin
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Original poster
NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 19:01

@Notcoolmum

Gemma who designed the method is a mum who was suffering with depression and putting too much stress of herself to keep the house perfect at all times, and her first child is called Tom hence the name.
Think we can all relate to too much pressure Confused
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Original poster
NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 19:02

@FourTeaFallOut

Another one with the app. I was going great guns with it until we started our extension. I was all ready to ramp things up again with a new year resolution and then I got covid on Jan 1st. Will give is another bash when I stop being bone tired. The book has some tough love about the benefit of keeping going even when you are under the weather, I'm ignoring that bit. Ignore the facebook group too, waste of time.
Sorry to hear about the covid. Definitely just rest - the house can wait and it's definitely put things in perspective. Get well soon
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Original poster
NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 19:04

@FindingMeno

Depends on your personality type. I can't get on with set routines.
I quite like a bit structure and am a bit of a planner at heart so it appeals to that side of me. Up until now I've just been making a list in the morning of things I'd like to get done that day and that's working okay but thought tom might help even more
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Original poster
NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 19:04

@Mol1628

Oh and she often discusses how her husband and her male children are also involved and do their part.
A Wise woman to get them in on it
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Hollyhead · 09/01/2022 19:04

It is still really hard for people who work full time out of the home in my opinion. And I find the woman who created it a bit patronising about how easy it os to do 30 mins - not if you’re out of the house for 12 hours a day and then want to squeeze in some nice time with your DC it’s not. I can see how if you wfh and/or part time it would work well.

Original poster
NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 19:05

@FourTeaFallOut

Apparently women spend an additional 21 hours doing unpaid work a week compared to men. I'm not sure it's a good or particularly feminist idea to sweep the disparity under the carpet by not reflecting that burden in books that pertain to cleaning.
In fairness my husband is great around the house and we have a hood system that works for us- he does all the cooking cause I'm atrocious. I just want to try and enhance things further to keep on top of things a little bit better
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merrymouse · 09/01/2022 19:06

I like really like Gemma and listen to the podcast, but don’t strictly follow the method.

Original poster
NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 19:06

@TreeLawney

I did it for a while. It does work. Turns out, if you constantly clean your house, you have a clean house.

I found it very hard to fit around a really demanding job - on days I was at home it was easy to fit in.

I do think it’s probably better suited to people like the creator who obsessively cleaned rather than those who would like to do the bare minimum! Only 30 mins a day is a bit misleading, it’s 30 mins + clean floors + clean something in the bathroom + laundry +++

Hmm sounded too good to be true 🙈
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DollyPartBaked · 09/01/2022 19:09

I dip in and out - not particularly successfully or consistently!

I always find the daily tasks (not included within the 30 minutes) take ages to do! It's also harder wfh/small kids

Fallagain · 09/01/2022 19:11

@eagerlywaitingfor

I'm sure it works - if you are organised enough to actually follow it, obviously.

It still irritates me though. Organised mum. Not organised dad, or family, or parent.

Mum. Organised mum.

Because mum has to be the default and be responsible for absolutely everything domestic, catering, household, child-related etc, doesn't she? Hmm

Sorry, but it does get on my tits.

Its referring to herself not to others. The women who created the method didn’t do it make money but she was encouraged to started method which worked for her.
merrymouse · 09/01/2022 19:13

It still irritates me though. Organised mum. Not organised dad, or family, or parent.

She has said that if she were starting again she would use a different name. I don’t think that she foresaw it’s popularity.

TankGirl97 · 09/01/2022 19:18

I use the app and find it helpful. I benefit from a bit of structure and the tick list is quite satisfying. I have personalised the routine on the app to suit me too, although I still don't manage it every day. I'm naturally a bit messy but this has helped me keep on top of things. In fact I'd say it has helped me develop some really good habits around cleaning and decluttering, and just generally made me a bit more houseproud (in a positive way!)

Hugasauras · 09/01/2022 19:19

We love it but it's absolutely split here between me and DH. She is the Organised Mum, but the name isn't great now it's taken off. I think she originally just meant it to be her method as the OM, not for organised mums (and I'm certainly not one of those anyway Grin)

The best bit IMO is not spending weekends catching up on stuff and being able to just enjoy them.

PenelopePitstop79 · 09/01/2022 19:36

@TreeLawney

I did it for a while. It does work. Turns out, if you constantly clean your house, you have a clean house.

I found it very hard to fit around a really demanding job - on days I was at home it was easy to fit in.

I do think it’s probably better suited to people like the creator who obsessively cleaned rather than those who would like to do the bare minimum! Only 30 mins a day is a bit misleading, it’s 30 mins + clean floors + clean something in the bathroom + laundry +++

Plus the kitchen which always seems to take 45 minutes in its own right every day.

I've never obsessively cleaned anything in my life. Never had to time box myself to stop perfectionism taking over.

Maybe that's why it hasn't worked for me!

Btw the Facebook group is terrific for seeing how other people organise stuff. Also if you have some esoteric cleaning query, someone on that group will know what to do.

LawnFever · 09/01/2022 19:43

The basics seem to be washing and putting away one load of laundry each day, tidying as you go, everything having a home, and only doing 30min housework per day on top of that. I do all of this and find it really works, but I don't have s strict rota I stick to.

I kinda just do this anyway, I thought it was pretty normal and didn’t realise it was a ‘method’.

I’d just rather do a quick clean/tidy up every day then spend all day cleaning at a weekend.

Stroopwaffle5000 · 09/01/2022 19:54

I think it's a fab app, unfortunately I have ADHD and so can only follow it on motivated days, and because I'm not consistant, it doesn't quite work for me 🤣

MiniPumpkin · 09/01/2022 20:02

I thought if I downloaded the app it would miraculously clean my house for me. No joy.

Antsgomarching · 09/01/2022 20:09

I always ended up doing an hour instead of 30 minutes (should have done boot. amp) and then decided to get a cleaner in instead. Good method though, just doing the basics keeps stuff from getting overwhelming if you are home enough.

soughsigh · 09/01/2022 20:24

I've been following it consistently for over a year and love how clean the house is. I have heavily modified it to suit my house (I have 2 bathroom days because I have 4 bathrooms) and use a bullet journal to organise myself - the app isn't customisable enough for me, I am very anal.

NotVictorianHonestly · 09/01/2022 20:50

Personally I get on much better with A Slob Comes Clean. It's much more realistic because it's written by someone who hates cleaning and organising. She has a podcast (but you need to start with the early episodes) a blog and various books.

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 09/01/2022 21:10

I've been introducing TOMM for the last few weeks, a little bit at a time and it's slowly making a difference. I don't know what happened to the print outs but I've got better at doing a little bit here and there, one load of washing a day, given the dc specific jobs. I have a hard time sticking to it rigidly because DH works shifts, and when Im at work Im out of the house for 9 hours.

Overall I like it.

Original poster
NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 21:34

@DollyPartBaked

I dip in and out - not particularly successfully or consistently!

I always find the daily tasks (not included within the 30 minutes) take ages to do! It's also harder wfh/small kids

This has been an eye opener I thought the whole thing would be 30 min start to finish but it doesn't seem to cover everything
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Original poster
NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 21:35

@TankGirl97

I use the app and find it helpful. I benefit from a bit of structure and the tick list is quite satisfying. I have personalised the routine on the app to suit me too, although I still don't manage it every day. I'm naturally a bit messy but this has helped me keep on top of things. In fact I'd say it has helped me develop some really good habits around cleaning and decluttering, and just generally made me a bit more houseproud (in a positive way!)
This sounds ideal! Exactly what I'm hoping for
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Original poster
NameChangeCity123 · 09/01/2022 21:35

@Hugasauras

We love it but it's absolutely split here between me and DH. She is the Organised Mum, but the name isn't great now it's taken off. I think she originally just meant it to be her method as the OM, not for organised mums (and I'm certainly not one of those anyway Grin)

The best bit IMO is not spending weekends catching up on stuff and being able to just enjoy them.

Free weekends?! Is it possible!!? The dream!
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