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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Softplay...

36 replies

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 08/01/2022 10:58

Okay, prepared to get flamed here. I'm at our local softplay and it is absolutely heaving.
Two birthday parties plus the usual Saturday morning bunch.
I'm here with three kids aged 5 who are all playing nicely together. One is a tiny bit more wild than the other 2 but none are particularly difficult IYKWIM. All very polite, none of them aggressive etc.
Anyway, I sat on the last available table which unfortunately isn't the best table for supervising from. Ive been told off by one of the birthday mums because she has more guests coming and wanted this table (wasn't reserved) and by her husband for refusing to give up the table.

Another mum has just complained to me that one of the boys knocked her 2 year old over in the over 4s section because I wasn't supervising properly. Tbf, I can hardly get near the area where it happened because there is a herd of dads stood around the perimeter. I do keep checking on the boys, but they are 5 year olds in a soft play so without climbing on all the equipment myself to follow them and insisting they stick together, I can't monitor them all the whole time.

AIBU to firstly, not have given up my table and secondly for not following the kids around?

OP posts:
KatieKat88 · 08/01/2022 11:02

I have a 2yo and it's my job to stop her getting trampled on, not the parent of a 5yo! I therefore stick to quieter times/smaller softplays where it's for younger kids.

KatieKat88 · 08/01/2022 11:02

Also that table was fair game, do not relinquish it.

LittleBearPad · 08/01/2022 11:03

Yanbu but soft play on a Saturday morning 😫. Well done to you!

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 08/01/2022 11:06

Party parent should pay for private hire if they want a private slot

Toddler parents should expect older children in the older children's section on a weekend or school holiday.

TheVolturi · 08/01/2022 11:07

I'm having heebie jeebies just thinking about soft play on a Saturday 🤦‍♀️

Original poster
SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 08/01/2022 11:07

@KatieKat88

I have a 2yo and it's my job to stop her getting trampled on, not the parent of a 5yo! I therefore stick to quieter times/smaller softplays where it's for younger kids.
This is what I thought! When DS was 2 I would let him on the bigger equipment if the softplay was quiet and I could follow him around. Really don't like it when adults are climbing all over the equipment or sat chatting in the ball pools when it's busy and other kids cant play
OP posts:
TheGoogleMum · 08/01/2022 11:07

Parents of younger kids should supervise them to keep them safe especially if they're in older kid area

ipswichwitch · 08/01/2022 11:07

On a busy Saturday having a 2 year old in the over 4 section is asking them to get knocked down! I remember witnessing a stand up row between a parent of a toddler who got sent flying in the over 5 section and the bigger kids dad - parent of toddler basically wanted all the bigger kids to stop running and bouncing about in the over 5 section because her toddler wanted to explore in there, and the bigger kids should suck it up and allow her to helicopter her child through it. Older kids dad told her in no uncertain terms there’s a reason that section is for over 5s! Some folk believe the world should stop for their child.
As for the birthday people, they should be taking it up with the venue if there aren’t enough tables for their guests - the table you have isn’t reserved so frankly you’re entitled to sit at it.

Original poster
SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 08/01/2022 11:08

Phew, looks like one of the parties is heading off to the party room now for games or something

OP posts:
pastabest · 08/01/2022 11:08

I voted YABU. Not for what you wrote but for going to soft play on a Saturday morning expecting anything other than the parenting version of the hunger games.

MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry · 08/01/2022 11:10

@TheVolturi

I'm having heebie jeebies just thinking about soft play on a Saturday 🤦‍♀️
Yeah, this^.

Hell.

Response to mother of 2 year old “oh dear, were you not supervising him properly?”

Original poster
SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 08/01/2022 11:10

@pastabest

I voted YABU. Not for what you wrote but for going to soft play on a Saturday morning expecting anything other than the parenting version of the hunger games.
🤣🤣 fair enough!!

It's not normally this ferrel here tbf! Or maybe it is but I've never been involved...

OP posts:
username1293948 · 08/01/2022 11:13

Yanbu. I supervise my 2 year old for this reason! 5 year olds shouldn’t need constant supervision.

Original poster
SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 08/01/2022 11:13

My reaction was quite involuntary... Think I looked at the 'over 4 sign' and shrugged. Wish I was quick enough for whitty come backs

OP posts:
IglesiasPiggl · 08/01/2022 11:14

Mercifully my soft play days are behind me, but you were definitely right not to give up your table. The party didn't have it reserved so it's not your problem. I also really got annoyed (and still do) with parents who let little kids into an age-inappropriate area meant for bigger ones, and then moan that the bigger kids are playing like big kids and don't want to pander to their little darling.

loopyapp · 08/01/2022 11:14

@pastabest

I voted YABU. Not for what you wrote but for going to soft play on a Saturday morning expecting anything other than the parenting version of the hunger games.
Best MN comment of the day right here
WorraLiberty · 08/01/2022 11:17

I'll probably get typed to death for this but...

I wonder if soft play places would be a better experience all round, if parents were made to switch their phones/ipads off.

I'm old enough to remember these places before mobile phones became popular and generally speaking, most parents kept a far closer eye on their kids.

Of course you'd always have the odd parent with their head buried in a book or newspaper, but on the whole, parents were more involved.

ItsAllAboutTheLighting · 08/01/2022 11:18

Do you have triplets? Or just happen to have three 5 year olds with you?

Either way, YANBU, as far as I'm concerned at that age they need to be let off the leash and you can't be preventing them from doing much (so long as it's regularly kiddy playing) because even if you did see something occur, you wouldn't stand a chance of being there in time.

It's up to the baby/2 year olds parent to make sure they are safe, in the toddler section and watched.

I've got 3 boys and it's just the way of it.

You do of course get the odd kid who fights the others one of mine was like this and that absolutely needs to be managed.

Thatsplentyjack · 08/01/2022 11:19

My response to the 2 year olds mother would have been "why on earth is your 2 year old in the over 4's section?"
, and to the people complaining about you taking a table, I probably couldn't think of anything to say to such stupidity so would probably just laugh at them.

CrazyOldBagLady · 08/01/2022 11:19

Kids get knocked over at soft play, playgroups, parks. It's just what happens especially at busy periods. I was probably a bit precious when mine was 2. Now he is one of the feral 'big kids' careering round. I take him there to get it all out of his system, not to tiptoe about. If you are taking a 2 year old into the older areas on a Saturday you should probably be made to don full body armour and sign a disclaimer.

ItsAllAboutTheLighting · 08/01/2022 11:20

@pastabest

I voted YABU. Not for what you wrote but for going to soft play on a Saturday morning expecting anything other than the parenting version of the hunger games.
In that case the OP isn't BU but the birthday mother and the parent of the 2 year old.
Workinghardeveryday · 08/01/2022 11:20

I hate soft play, haven’t been since pre Covid times as they are on another level for germs at the best of times!

I once saw my ds who was 5 at the time go down the slide, when he got to the bottom a much older boy came up to him and smacked him around his head, this boys mum then came over to me and very aggressively shouted at me because my 5 year old had just hit her son! She saw the whole thing apparently.... SO did I!!!

Ilikeviognier · 08/01/2022 11:20

Soft play full stop. Yuk. Especially on a Saturday morning. Sorry that’s not very helpful!! Grin . As you say though - over 4s is a section for a reason! . Also tough to the party people if the table wasn’t marked!

CrazyOldBagLady · 08/01/2022 11:21

Worra yes you are probably right. I see a lot of kids wanting to engage but their parents or childminders are 'elsewhere'.

ItsAllAboutTheLighting · 08/01/2022 11:24

I love soft play 😳

The kids run off, they are having fun wearing themselves out, the background noise is just like white noise and I just do work on my laptop or read/watch murder mystery on YouTube.