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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how you deal with nappies and potty training etc if you're squeamish?!

130 replies

7upluck · 06/01/2022 09:01

I know I'm probably going to get flamed for this, but I promise I'm not being goady!

Pregnant with my first and I'm already worried about how I'll cope with changing nappies, potty training, wiping bums etc. I am honestly the most squeamish person, I can't abide my own bodily fluids let alone someone else's.

It's something that no one talks about because it seems everyone else doesn't mind. I was out for lunch with a friend yesterday and there was a little girl on the table next to us with her mum and dad. She announced very loudly 'Mummy, I need a poo.' (which when I was eating and am suffering from nausea anyway left me feeling a bit Envy

OP posts:
Hemingwayscatz · 06/01/2022 11:35

You just deal with it because it’s your child and you love them. Nobody wants to wipe shit, piss, vomit and snot up but it has to be done, you don’t have a choice as a parent.

Lorw · 06/01/2022 11:54

You’ll get over it real quick 😂 especially with a newborn, mines 2 weeks old and I have had every bodily fluid on me several times, newborns have great aim 😂

mistermagpie · 06/01/2022 12:02

You get used to it. I'm the same, I am very squeamish and the thought of my own snot and poo is bad enough, never mind another persons! I've got three children aged 2, 4 and 6 and I can tell you - that is a baptism of fire for the easily grossed out. I now couldn't give a (pardon the pun) shit about their snot and poo and all that, you just get used to it I suppose.

One thing I can't do though, is share drinks/food/cutlery with them though. Even pre-Covid, the idea of someone having a sip of my drink or trying a bit of my dinner with my fork and then putting it back made me feel ill, even my DH who I will happily kiss etc. I'm the same with my kids and if they drink a bit of my drink while my back is turned or something, I can't finish it.

110APiccadilly · 06/01/2022 12:02

I have worked in a care home so am pretty undisgustable with this sort of thing, but DH was worried (he's quite sensitive to bad smells etc). He's actually been fine (apart from a couple of times when he was already feeling under the weather). You probably will be ok when it happens!

mistermagpie · 06/01/2022 12:03

@lljkk

For me the worst was snot... ugh. Some ppl are impervious and would leave it to run down the face go hard & crusty (for hours...) snow & toothpaste (in a mouth) both still make me want to heave. I learnt to deal with all of the body stuff as quick as possible.

i was lucky that DH wasn't squeamish about any bodily effluent, just dealt with it all calmly.

I guess I got used to it all -- good thing. Being squeamish is so inconvenient.

This!

My SIL lets her two kids walk around with snot all over their faces and crusted round their noses all the time, it's disgusting and I wouldn't like that for myself, so why let your children suffer like that?

Jubaju · 06/01/2022 12:46

The snot sucker is far worse than a pooey nappy 🤢 bleurgh

RedCandyApple · 06/01/2022 12:50

Tbh when it’s your own kids you don’t even give it a second thought, I can deal with poo is vomit I really struggle with 🤢😰

londonrach · 06/01/2022 13:23

You just do it. It's part of being a parent and tbh the easiest bit compared to no sleep and a screaming baby and that's easy compared to a 3-4 year old! I miss doing nappies as so simple now. You find you just do it op

pearldrops04 · 06/01/2022 16:39

Thank you for the kind and measured responses, not so much the 'Why are you having a child/ how did you get pregnant/ grow up etc.' Hmm

I never suggested I would just leave my child covered in shit etc, I said in my OP, ultimately I know I'm just going to have to man up and get on with it, but I can't be the only person who gets a bit squeamish about other people's bodily fluids and I wondered whether other people have had similar anxiety and how they've coped.

I also find it funny how posters have openly admitted their partners/ husbands are too squeamish to change nappies etc yet because I'm a women and would be the mum I just have to suck it up, I will have to suck it up but so will DH, no way is he getting out of doing the dirtywork. Just sad how the majority of child rearing and everything associated with it is still seen as the 'mother's responsibility.'

vodkaredbullgirl · 06/01/2022 16:42

Name fail op.

Booksandwine80 · 06/01/2022 16:45

Come back to this thread after you’ve dealt with a poonami, when it’s spread all up their back and into their hair Grin

vodkaredbullgirl · 06/01/2022 16:46

Don't forget the walls, cot, toys when they get a bit older and explore their nappy.

FangsForTheMemory · 06/01/2022 16:47

Protip: do not feed your baby spinach. Ever. The nappies are spectacular.

EishetChayil · 06/01/2022 16:49

I was worried about this too but weirdly with my DD I don't mind the smell of her poo and vom.

VestaTilley · 06/01/2022 16:52

But late to be worrying about this now aren’t you, OP?

You just grow up and deal with it. You can’t leave a baby sat in a wet or dirty nappy.

Be aware that babies and toddlers often get upset tummies and do explosive poos when they’re only consuming milk- you will have to change them a lot.

You get used to it when it’s your own child, and to be honest, with all else you have to contend with as a mother it’ll be the least of your problems.

Judith0000 · 06/01/2022 16:53

More than poo, what makes me squeamish is raging nappy rash.
One of my DC had terrible nappy rash, it made my stomach flip to see it, all red and angry and incredibly painful!
Dealing with poo was nothing compared to that. Sad

pearldrops04 · 06/01/2022 16:54

@VestaTilley

But late to be worrying about this now aren’t you, OP?

You just grow up and deal with it. You can’t leave a baby sat in a wet or dirty nappy.

Be aware that babies and toddlers often get upset tummies and do explosive poos when they’re only consuming milk- you will have to change them a lot.

You get used to it when it’s your own child, and to be honest, with all else you have to contend with as a mother it’ll be the least of your problems.

Again, where have I said I would leave a child sitting in a wet or dirty nappy?! Read my posts!!

Growing up has nothing to do with it either when it's a genuine phobia.

Freecuthbert · 06/01/2022 16:58

Surely you wipe your own arse. It's just more of that really.

ButtOutBobsMum · 06/01/2022 17:03

Don’t know about anyone else but I could cope with all types of nappies, including poonamis! But I have NEVER been able to handle vomit. I would retch until I was sick. Luckily DH, whilst having a total aversion to poo, could handle puke no problem. So I was poo and he was puke! Ah, the joys of parenting!

2bazookas · 06/01/2022 17:09

Baby poo and baby sick is not like yours/adults'. In any way.

Once the baby has broken you in to baby poo and baby sick you'll turn into an Amazon woman who can handle anything.

Freecuthbert · 06/01/2022 17:30

@2bazookas

Cleaning up adult poo, vomit and other bodily fluids is a lot worse than baby poo and sick, unless I am misunderstanding you think babies are worse? Babies only have milk for the first 6 months... as someone who has had to deal with poo smearing and every bodily fluid in mental health units, babies are a doddle in comparison. Plus your own baby feels like an extension of you. So I think if you can cope with wiping your own arse, you can surely cope with wiping a baby's. Anyone squeamish about a baby's arse needs to get a grip.

SmellyOldPartridgeinaPearTree · 06/01/2022 17:35

Once you've been through childbirth and the sleep deprivation you stop giving a shit about this kind of (literal) shite.

MaybeHeIsMyCat · 06/01/2022 22:35

Vicks up your nose
Honestly you get used to it - I don't have DC but my first few weeks as a carer were.. tricky
If I went back to care now I would struggle again but you do genuinely not notice after a bit

NeverDropYourMooncup · 06/01/2022 22:44

@pearldrops04

Thank you for the kind and measured responses, not so much the 'Why are you having a child/ how did you get pregnant/ grow up etc.' Hmm

I never suggested I would just leave my child covered in shit etc, I said in my OP, ultimately I know I'm just going to have to man up and get on with it, but I can't be the only person who gets a bit squeamish about other people's bodily fluids and I wondered whether other people have had similar anxiety and how they've coped.

I also find it funny how posters have openly admitted their partners/ husbands are too squeamish to change nappies etc yet because I'm a women and would be the mum I just have to suck it up, I will have to suck it up but so will DH, no way is he getting out of doing the dirtywork. Just sad how the majority of child rearing and everything associated with it is still seen as the 'mother's responsibility.'

Well, as you say, you won't leave your baby covered in shit - you won't feel the anxiety, as you'll know you have to deal with it.

However, there will be occasional times where you think Oh. My. God. for the first few seconds.

Those times, you'll put the baby straight into the bath, clothes, nappy and all and deal with it that way rather than with a couple of balls bags of cotton wool and some cooled, boiled water.

DrSbaitso · 06/01/2022 22:55

Those times, you'll put the baby straight into the bath, clothes, nappy and all and deal with it that way

Oh no, clothes off, baby in the bath, clothes to the INCINERATOR!

Joking, of course. One thing about poo...it doesn't stain and it comes off very easily.