Should someone who's been waiting longer than you at the bus stop always get on first?

[Letthebodieshitthefloor]

The bus I take is essentially a coach, always plenty of seats even at busy hours.

This morning I approached the bus stop, a woman was already there, and I saw her glaring at me because I was standing in the bus stop rather than at the side.

She then let another woman on first who'd perhaps been there longer than she had, then got herself in front of me and looked at me making sure I wouldn't get on before she did.

It's all a bit petty really, the bus was almost empty, it's not going to go without you.

If there were a pregnant/vulnerable/elderly passenger getting on and I could see there weren't many seats left then I'd let them on first.

@MsJaneAusten

I got very confused when waiting for a bus in Cuba as whenever anyone new arrived at the bus stop they would ask ‘ultimo?’ and the last person to arrive would raise a hand or nod at them, but everyone just sat or stood where they wanted to. When the bus arrived, they seamlessly formed themselves into a queue, with each person standing behind their ‘ultimo’. It was a thing of beauty.

This is amazing.

Do you jump in the queue at the supermarket? Same principle applies. First there is first on.

I'm a bad un. My usual stop for getting the bus to work has clear demarcation of there the bus doors will stop and that's where they stop. That's where I stand. Everyone else huddles under the shelter 10 yards away glaring at their phones. They wouldn't even know the bus was coming if I didn't flag it down. I get on first regardless of them as waiting for them to take point would mean I miss my bus and I was late for work. Screw the glare, screw the queuing. I have places to be. (With the exception of helping those in obvious need of priority seating).

@MsJaneAusten

I got very confused when waiting for a bus in Cuba as whenever anyone new arrived at the bus stop they would ask ‘ultimo?’ and the last person to arrive would raise a hand or nod at them, but everyone just sat or stood where they wanted to. When the bus arrived, they seamlessly formed themselves into a queue, with each person standing behind their ‘ultimo’. It was a thing of beauty.

I think this happens here, just the British are too shy to actually ask if someone is "ultimo".

We just mentally register with one sweep of an eye who is there already and therefore who should board before us.

We also keep a mental list without even thinking of it of all those who arrive after us and should board after us.

So even if everyone is milling around, there is in fact a queue.

Thank god I live in South London, where people apparently have more important things on their mind than whether someone who arrived 10 seconds after them gets on the bus before them

Fair enough if it's a quiet stop with like 3 people, but a stop with 8 different routes and several dozen people hanging about? You give precedence to the elderly, people with disabilities, people with little kids maybe, and that's it. Then you get on the bus and move on with your life.

I can't believe people seriously get upset about the queue order on an empty bus with plenty of seats for everyone.

I always used to go last. I had no idea why, I just always did from the time i stared using buses alone. Reading this thread had made me realise it's because I don't understand the unsaid and going last helped me avoid getting it wrong or having to do some bizarre without words communication with other passengers. I'm autistic (I didn't know this when I used buses) so you have just opened my eyes to another thing I didn't realise was due to that!! Thanks.

The funny thing then is that if someone accidentally pushes in and it’s SEEN to be accidental a weird Mexican stand off takes place where the next true person offers the place anyway and then the pusher in refuses in embarrassment then the next true person is unsure what to do

Of course you let them on first. It’s manners.

@FortniteBoysMum

Do you jump in the queue at the supermarket? Same principle applies. First there is first on.

But it's not the same thing at all

A till can only process one person at a time

For a bus, all of you are getting on the bus, within seconds of each other. You are all getting served at essentially the same time.

The only advantage of getting on earlier is the chance of a better seat, which is why I don't understand getting upset when there's plenty of seats for everyone.

I like the system we have. It’s an opportunity to be gracious and give way which spreads a little love about and I like to think sets good examples. I’ve always taught my children to give up seats and give way when they can. I doubt they go this all the time, I’m sure they don’t but I didn’t in my teens either. Getting on a bus in the 1980’s after school was a life or death situation with old ladies battering us over the head and us shouting back at them. It was mayhem but now I am a very considerate public transport user

Are you Italian? Getting on a bus in Amalfi was worse than covent garden tube station at rush hour.

The bus arrives and everyone launches at the door like a large and unrefereed rugby scrum irrespective of age/disability/time waiting.

We're British, we queue, I think it is part of the citizenship test 🤣

@dreamingbohemian agreed!

@Guavaf1sh

The funny thing then is that if someone accidentally pushes in and it’s SEEN to be accidental a weird Mexican stand off takes place where the next true person offers the place anyway and then the pusher in refuses in embarrassment then the next true person is unsure what to do

This is true. You get the “after you” “no after you” “ oh thank you” dance. I like that too

@JesusMaryAndJosephAndTheWeeDon

Are you Italian? Getting on a bus in Amalfi was worse than covent garden tube station at rush hour.

The bus arrives and everyone launches at the door like a large and unrefereed rugby scrum irrespective of age/disability/time waiting.

We're British, we queue, I think it is part of the citizenship test 🤣

Try being in China! There are people who queue for places, and then we’re dozens who simply went straight to the front of the queue so once finally there, tutting didn’t work so I had to fight to be seen first! It’s a great place though, can’t wait to go again!

This is the first thing I learnt when I moved here! In some places I've stayed people actually formed a queue and if not, people sort of remember who arrived first and form a mental queue

Absolutely, no one in my city would dream of not queuing patiently in order of arrival once the bus pulls up or standing in front of where they are waiting. It's definitely a well observed etiquette

My mind has just blown at the (my) double standards for buses and trains.

Buses: OF COURSE those who were there before get to board first

Trains: SUCKERS! I know where the train doors open, I'll be waiting there and I have NO SYMPATHY if you don't know the best place to wait (unless you have kids, buggy, older etc and I don't sit in priority seats, I'm not a savage)

If you arrive later and there are many people there it's hard to know who got there first etc. Unless you form an orderly queue based on arrival time

It doesn't matter which of them got there first they're are all in front of you 😆

Of course you need to board after the person who’s already there. What you want to do is irrelevant. Bus etiquette in the UK is that you queue & in many smaller towns if you do try to push in repeatedly you may find yourself banned like my DH’s thick as pig shit friend did.

Oh unless a wheelchair comes along last then everyone parts politely to let them by

Can I ask why people say the bus and train are different? Why do you queue for bus but not for train?

I was in, New Jersey, I think, at what turned out to be a coach-into-NYC sort of stop. There was a row of key rings on the ground, in the pouring rain. I was weirded out; thought maybe somebody (somebodies, plural!) might have lost them, so I poked my head in the shop and asked if anybody had lost some keys. The glare back and the hissed "just leave them where they are" from the several commuters could have fried an egg, even in that weather.

That was their queue. I prefer the British virtual queue. But I have to say I love the Cuban "ultimo" queue, too!

@Letthebodieshitthefloor

A savage.. 😂 If you arrive later and there are many people there it's hard to know who got there first etc. Unless you form an orderly queue based on arrival time

But if you arrive and you see other people there already, they are automatically before you. They got there first.

If you have good manners then yes.

@Letthebodieshitthefloor

A savage.. 😂 If you arrive later and there are many people there it's hard to know who got there first etc. Unless you form an orderly queue based on arrival time

It’s not hard to know who got there before (or after) you, you don’t need to worry about anything else. People are more picky about where and with who they sit at the moment, so first dibs to the early birds.

Wheelchairs come on when the driver puts the ramp down, and I don’t sit in the priority seats unless I’m in pain - not that you’d know to look at me.