To be pissed off at HCW bashing during covid?

[outbackjulie]

On this Australian site there is a thread about "why are some nurses so awful". I know the post isn't about me but as a nurse of fifteen years who is as burned out as any of my colleagues, AIBU to think it's very poor form to even pose the question at the moment?

And it's not just there, it's here on MN and on other sites I visit. I get that people remember their bad experiences much more clearly than the good but FFS give us a break. For every nasty bully there are thousands of wonderful people doing their best.

What I object to here is the OP saying "AIBU to think it's very poor form to even pose the question at the moment?"

As though everyone should put up and shut up when they've been treated badly.

Thankfully that's not how it works.

I think what people do getos that these kinds of threads and discussions do affect how people treat nurses and other HCWs when thy access healthcare. There has been a massive shift in people coming in to hospital and automatically assuming negative things about the nurses/being rude and difficult right from the outset for absolutely no trigger by the nurse. These people often cite stories that have absolutely nothing to do with them that they have read online. It riles people up.

I seriously had to deal with a visitor who combined that the nurses were wearing socks which were colourful and not black, as he thought they should be. He said "you keep reading online people saying nurses care less but only now I've come in to hospital I've seen it's true". When I asked exacty what affect the sock colour had on his child's care he had no answer (but clearly thought I was unsympathetic).

I think what people do getos that these kinds of threads and discussions do affect how people treat nurses and other HCWs when thy access healthcare. There has been a massive shift in people coming in to hospital and automatically assuming negative things about the nurses/being rude and difficult right from the outset for absolutely no trigger by the nurse. These people often cite stories that have absolutely nothing to do with them that they have read online. It riles people up.

What's your source?

If there's been a 'massive shift' in people automatically assuming negative things when they go into a hospital, due to reading complaints online, surely the vast majority will be pleasantly surprised unless they're being treated badly?

Sock man and the like will always exist but generally speaking, people don't get like that because they've read complaints by patients who feel they were badly treated.

My source is me lol. I've been in healthcare for almost 15 years in some form or another.

I find it quite strange that a HCP is using the pandemic to attempt to guilt trip patients into shutting up about their traumatic experiences, personally. I posted a few weeks ago about my appalling birth experience - which has left me with physical and mental scars - and I believe I had every right to do so, and to seek support for the problems I have been landed with due to negligent (and downright cruel) treatment.

If the complaint being made isn't about you, then - it isn't about you. It's weird that you think the pandemic should in any way affect the morality of patients speaking up about poor treatment, or that they should refrain from doing so out of some sort of brand loyalty to you

The problem I have with the whole “aren’t all NHS workers great” narrative we suddenly find ourselves drowned in is that it dismisses the genuine concerns of the people who have received atrocious and abusive healthcare - and there’s plenty of them! People who have life altering conditions, or have lost loved ones, or have had stillborn babies purely down to terrible HCWs. I’m sure you’re a wonderful nurse OP but we can’t silence the voices of those who have suffered and continue to suffer.

YABU I'm afraid. There are some awful nurses, just like there are some awful people in all jobs. It is unreasonable to expect people to just shut up about their bad experiences and sometimes downright terrible treatment just because you happen to do the same job as the specific individuals they are criticising.

I'm a teacher. It drives me mad when people make sweeping negative statements about teachers as a whole. But sone teachers are terrible. I know - I've worked with some terrible ones! So it would be ridiculous for me to be upset by someone talking about how awful some teachers are.

I think it can sting when you know you have been doing your best but you just have to realise it isn't aimed at you.

However, I have to say the one thing that really winds me up is when people claim the nurses 'are just having a chat at the nurses station'. Actually we are writing notes, completing referrals, doing phone handovers, writing care plans, completing paperwork for our students, typing up notes for handover and on and on. We may or may not have the odd chat while doing this (obviously we need to talk to our student while doing their paperwork) just as most people who work in offices do not work in complete silence. Due to this perception we were not allowed to have drinks at the nurses station in case it looked like God forbid we were having a chat and a cuppa! Again most people in offices have a cup of tea or whatever as they work. We often didn't get our breaks so a quick cup of tea while we wrote our notes would have been SO appreciated!

@UndertheCedartree but sometimes it’s true. I spent a few nights in hospital and the night staff watched movies loud and had a laugh most of the night. I dare say they do plenty at times but when you’re needing help and you have to wait for them to finish their chat about being out etc or stop watching their film, that’s a problem.

I’m sorry to say that 90% of my interactions with HCPs have been bad. I’m too afraid to visit a Dr now and I simply put up with any symptoms I might get. I dread getting old and/or seriously I’ll as then I’ll be at their mercy. Who knows, there might be some good HCPs out there, but I’ve never come across any.

Tbh I am a bit sick of way the NHS is deified, with nurses in particular for some reason being held up on pedestals as if all of them are angels.

Yes, there are many great nurses. But, as with any profession, there are also bad nurses and HCPs.

I don’t think it helps anyone to pretend that the NHS is perfect and that nurses are all heroes. It particularly doesn’t help those suffering from poor healthcare, which does happen.

YANBU. In my local Facebook group, a woman posted about her father’s ‘neglect and abuse in hospital where the staff killed him’; I recognised her surname and realised I had actually cared for her father before he died (from his illness, not at the hands of staff), reading the lies she had written was horrific, and seeing that she had actually made a petition and a whole group for others to share their stories (some of whom I also recognised) is just galling when you know it to be false. I know people want someone to blame when their loved one dies, but to be called a murderer is quite something else.

I think people are allowed to discuss their own personal negative experiences. It wouldn't be right to say the majority are doing a great job so lets just sweep the bad under the carpet. You only have to read the gp threads on here to see some heartbreaking stories of mothers/fathers etc being lost to serious illness due to gps not seeing patients and diagnosing over the phone. A neighbour died recently from something completely treatable had they been able to access care.

Fwiw I'v found nurses to be mostly caring etc so I do have a positive outlook on them. On the other hand during my first ever hospital stay what I witnessed was the ward dr talking to nurses, housekeepers etc like they were muck on his shoe (should of reported him but being ill you don't feel up to it at the time). That experience has probably meant i'v formed a negative overall opinion of drs (despite knowing several lovely ones when not in work mode). That said I'd never engage in HCW 'bashing' just for the sake of it.

I've been literally starved by nurses they really arnt all nice constantly "forgetting" to order me a gluten free meal expecting me to eat weetabix for breakfast and sandwiches for tea not to mention battered food for lunch the Dr's ordered it wrote it on my notes reminded them every day ring down order gluten free food every day "forgetting" I get up for breakfast to "can't you have toast" "we have weetabix for you" my mil got asked to leave because she asked if they were thick or fucking neglectful the Dr managed to get me a couple of meals in 6 days then I got transferred to a different ward the staff there got mil to bring in a loaf of bread snd used the staff room to make me toast for breakfast ordered my lunch daily and I had more toast for tea (complicated system breakfast was cold cereal tea was sandwiches bought in lunch was cooked on site weird)

Anyway I had literally had a baby who was sick and I needed to breastfeed and couldn't as I was hungry I had an infection my body kept trying to shut down I just needed food and something to drink on the first ward you had to ask for water the toilet taps were unsuitable it was a nightmare because they wouldn't get you any basic things like that shouldn't be an issue and it was there responsibility they helped others but there were a few they refused to help like me

It's not personal it's just facts 🤷

OP, if you have a problem with what's on a site, post on that site.

You say it's on MN too, so post there.

Some nurses are rubbish though

[quote JimCarreysMask]@UndertheCedartree but sometimes it’s true. I spent a few nights in hospital and the night staff watched movies loud and had a laugh most of the night. I dare say they do plenty at times but when you’re needing help and you have to wait for them to finish their chat about being out etc or stop watching their film, that’s a problem.[/quote]
I'm sorry to hear that. You shouldn't have had to wait if they weren't busy.

The thing is, like for most jobs, the awful people are heavily concentrated in some areas. They will be in departments, or occasionally trusts, with poor cultures. Most wards and departments will have good nurses, and a culture of decency. Some people though are unfortunate to live somewhere where they have only encountered really toxic cultures and the treatment that goes with it. Locally we had a maternity labour ward like this, pretty shocking and callous behaviour was quite a norm. I was scared of labour ward treatments, but then I birthed again elsewhere and spoke to people and realised just how outside the norm this place was.

I’m a teacher and it’s the same with schools. I once walked out of an interview as it was very clear the culture was horrendous and I was not ok with how young people were being treated.

Some people simply have perceptions formed by their repeated experiences, and they often live in areas with further socio economic challenges to deal with, generally poor infrastructure. This adds to the perception no one cares about them and they are treated badly. I see the difference more now I’ve moved areas and progressed in earnings how shit it sometimes was.

I really don't think it should be out of bounds to discuss instances of poor career because there's a pandemic on. Or in general at all.

The same as any job, there's good and bad. If someone had a bad experience with someone in my industry, its not a reflection on me. Nor is it wrong to voice it.

@RocketFire7

Tbh I am a bit sick of way the NHS is deified, with nurses in particular for some reason being held up on pedestals as if all of them are angels.

Yes, there are many great nurses. But, as with any profession, there are also bad nurses and HCPs.

I don’t think it helps anyone to pretend that the NHS is perfect and that nurses are all heroes. It particularly doesn’t help those suffering from poor healthcare, which does happen.

This post sums up my feelings exactly. I am lucky in that our local surgery, GPs, nurses and staff are all brilliant and have really pulled out all the stops during the pandemic so that people have not felt sidelined.

However, I have had occasion to visit A & E over the last year and my experience could not have been more different. The triage nurses I saw were dismissive and, quite frankly, rude and made me feel as if I was wasting their time even being there. And it wasn't just me, I heard one of them being rude to a lady who was obviously in pain and scared. Unnecessary, especially as people weren't allowed to have someone with them for support - my husband was told by a nurse to wait in the car as he wasn't allowed in with me.

Well some are awful. But some aren't. They're human like the rest of us. It's the hero worship during covid I object to. No need.