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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

For not being able to get my daughter to school?

46 replies

Weirdmom · 05/01/2022 14:50

So me and my partner and my son have come down with covid over the last few days and are obviously feeling pretty crap.

When I rang in to tell work (also where my daughter goes to school) today I also told them I wouldn't be able to get my daughter (5) to school as I have no one to get her there.

Had a phone call an hour later from school telling me
My daughter has to come to school as she isn't required to isolate
Her attendance is already at 87% so I can legally be prosecuted
Try finding a family nearby that does the school run to same school or I could drive up and member of staff can meet her from the car park

So I don't drive and don't have any mom friends at the school? The only person who would usually be able to help me in this situation is my mom who is also isolating with covid

(Just to explain her attendance is due to 9 days off, 5 were due to her testing positive to covid, 2 days were a sickness bug and another 2 days were due to waiting for pcr results as her sister had covid and school requested it)

OP posts:
HippeePrincess · 05/01/2022 16:48

It’s a stupid rule, I’m the only driver in our house, dp works longer than school hours like most people. Even if he could get there on time a taxi would be £40 a day!
I thought I had covid and I wasn’t sure how I’d get the kids to school. We live across town from school, the only other family I know haven’t got a big enough car for my kid’s as well as theirs.
I have no family in the area and no friends who aren’t either doing their own school run, working.
I know the school won’t help as I had this issue for another illness and they couldn’t care less.

Blue565 · 05/01/2022 17:09

@StarryNightSky26

I wouldn't be lying about dc having covid symptoms at all. I'd be completely honest and placing this firmly back at the school's door.

I'd be emailing them reiterating the fact that:

  • DH and I are currently covid positive.
  • We do not drive.
  • We do not have anyone else who is able to do the school run.

Then I would state that I fully expect the school to give dc an authorised absence until x date or to provide me the details of the school staff member who will be collecting dc and dropping them home.

We're in the exact same situation at present. DH and I are positive, dc negative. I phoned school yesterday to tell them and they've simply put dc down as authorised absence until next Tuesday when we're out of isolation.

Yes, this

Schools overstep far too much these days

saraclara · 05/01/2022 17:16

You say you don't drive. Does your DH?

Personally I think schools should be glad when kids aren't in because both parents have Covid, but if one of you drives, I don't think the school is being unreasonable in suggesting that one of you drive up and staff meet your DD at the car.

Justgettingbye · 05/01/2022 17:16

I'm involved in absence in my school. We've had this a lot and it goes down as authorised. The school is being unreasonable

Chloemol · 05/01/2022 17:19

I would challenge the school

Covid shouldn’t show in her figures. You have no one and have covid and are too ill to get out, there are no friends or family available

If they want to come and collect her and bring her home then ok, otherwise you expect them to accept the non attendance

JasmineGarden · 05/01/2022 17:19

@RussianSpy101

Can you not drive her up to school and let a staff member meet her at the car, as suggested?
From the opening post

So I don't drive....

RussianSpy101 · 05/01/2022 17:31

@JasmineGarden oops!! Sorry, it’s been a long day 😂

Blahblahblah21 · 05/01/2022 17:48

I do the attendance at work. Codes are:
X02 - Covid symptoms & tested positive on LF or going for PCR.
I02 - confirmed case of Covid
C - other authorised absence by the head

Bizarrely the x code does not register in overall attendance but the I code does so, having had a shedload of kids off with Covid last term, our overall school attendance is now really bad.
The c code can be used at the heads discretion if a family are all ill & all possible avenues to get the child to school have been exhausted. This is not used in every case as there are some families with previous poor attendance who are using Covid as a great excuse not to go to school.

Don’t worry about your attendance, I know our council aren’t doing a thing about it. If you can email the head explain your personal circumstances, ask for school work & request that it’s not put as unauthorised- it’s worked for a number of families at our school.
As a school they have to make the suggestions as per government guidance.

DeepaBeesKit · 05/01/2022 17:53

Do you not know a single other mum or dad at the school? Do you have a pta or class whatsapp where you can ask if any parents can help?

I wouldn't dream of putting someone in that position by asking them.

At our school people offer this all the time when they hear of a parent with Covid. I've walked my neighbours kids when Dad had Covid, they are 5 &7. I had 4 offers to walk my DC when I had it. We are a close knit community though.

Theunamedcat · 05/01/2022 17:59

Honestly I'm just recovering from covid I couldn't safely drive with it and walking is hard I mean I could have got to school (downhill) but not home without fainting

JasmineGarden · 05/01/2022 19:35

[quote RussianSpy101]@JasmineGarden oops!! Sorry, it’s been a long day 😂[/quote]
It's 7:30 & I'm struggling to stay awake!! It's only Wednesday!! 😂🤣

Original poster
Weirdmom · 06/01/2022 11:11

Thanks for all your advice everyone. Not sure why but it rattled me but I guess it's cos I'm not feeling great and kinda stuck with options. Neither of us drive and I don't feel comfortable sending my daughter with another school mom neither of us know even if I found one.
The school said they would authorise yesterday for me so I could 'rack my brain' for options.
I've had a voicemail this morning from the same lady asking to 'ring back urgently' so I'll guess I'll just explain and that's that.

Thanks again

OP posts:
Original poster
Weirdmom · 06/01/2022 11:56

So I rung back and she said if I've exhausted all options then they have to put it down as unauthorised. I did ask if school had the choice to authorise and she said no and proceeded to explain all government guidance and then said she needed to tell me all this incase they also decide to prosecute that I've been made aware of everything. So there we go I guess I'll just wait and see

OP posts:
Idontknowlondon · 06/01/2022 13:32

@Weirdmom

So I rung back and she said if I've exhausted all options then they have to put it down as unauthorised. I did ask if school had the choice to authorise and she said no and proceeded to explain all government guidance and then said she needed to tell me all this incase they also decide to prosecute that I've been made aware of everything. So there we go I guess I'll just wait and see
Don't worry. No one is going to do anything, no fine, no prosecution, nothing.
JugglingJanuary · 10/01/2022 19:34

Don't worry about it, they're not going to bother & if they did they'd get nowhere. It's illegal for you to go out & they can't compel you to get anyone else to do it.

Blueeyedgirl21 · 10/01/2022 22:49

Just say your daughters developed a sniffle so you’ve ordered her a home test. By the time the thing comes and you’ve sent it back you’ll be out of isolation

arethereanyleftatall · 11/01/2022 07:32

@DeepaBeesKit

Do you not know a single other mum or dad at the school? Do you have a pta or class whatsapp where you can ask if any parents can help?

I wouldn't dream of putting someone in that position by asking them.

At our school people offer this all the time when they hear of a parent with Covid. I've walked my neighbours kids when Dad had Covid, they are 5 &7. I had 4 offers to walk my DC when I had it. We are a close knit community though.

Same where I live @DeepaBeesKit It seems we're very lucky I guess, this isn't the first post like this. It's a shame for others that there doesn't seem to be this community spirit everywhere. Even if you're not friends with anyone, a stranger would offer if you popped this on our local fb page.
arethereanyleftatall · 11/01/2022 07:48

To clarify - when I say stranger - they're not really strangers any more - there a large handful of people who have been publicly doing things to help others this whole lockdown.

AliveAndSleeping · 11/01/2022 08:34

@DeepaBeesKit

Do you not know a single other mum or dad at the school? Do you have a pta or class whatsapp where you can ask if any parents can help?

I wouldn't dream of putting someone in that position by asking them.

At our school people offer this all the time when they hear of a parent with Covid. I've walked my neighbours kids when Dad had Covid, they are 5 &7. I had 4 offers to walk my DC when I had it. We are a close knit community though.

It's very kind of people to offer and do this but I wouldn't want to ask anyone to potentially expose themselves to COVID especially not in the car. If it subsequently turns out that DC does have COVID and infects anyone else I'd feel terrible. I think, the school is unreasonable to expect this.
billy1966 · 11/01/2022 09:44

Email them OP as suggested above, spelling out that you are unable to bring her due to illness but that you are happy to have her ready for collection.

What a shower.

Have they nothing else to be doing with their time.

Flowers
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