Is it normal or total imposter syndrome

[WorkWorries1]

I have just bagged my dream job. Currently on my final month of notice from current job where I have made amazing friends, do it well and on a decent salary.

This job is literally all I ever wanted, but I am waking up in the middle of the night in hot sweats thinking about it.

I haven’t lied on my cv in anyway, I can do this job. But it’s a job where I will be a lone wolf with lots of really experienced people around me (I am 33 and most of my deputies are older). They don’t report into me as such but on a lowe salary scale.

I can not get out of my head about it and feel like it’s a massive mistake, I am the breadwinner and the salary uplift will be life changing. But I am certain I will fail and be sacked after 3 months.

This is normal isn’t it when changing high profile jobs? Or do I need to see the GP and get some anti anxiety meds, I have 4 weeks to go and not sure I can survive the utter feeling of being an imposter.

Imposter syndrome

Do some yoga and deep breathing.

I work in a company full of people with it.

I think it’s certainly imposter syndrome, my portfolio of projects I have delivered has what has gotten me the job. But I am so scared it’s because I know the company not the art of delivering if that makes sense.

Does anyone know if imposter syndrome can be used as a reason to get anti anxiety medication, I am not sure how I can cope.

I have been having meetings with colleagues and other directors throughout my notice period and have probably left an awful impression as I have been so nervous!

I am firmly of the belief that you should be terrified for a good 3 months after starting a job - at least at intervals - or you could have applied for a more senior job.

However, it sounds like it's impacting your ability to perform, do you think something like beta blockers would help? They'd stop the physical manifestation of the anxiety which can then reduce the anxiety itself.

I am very close to trying to cancelling my resignation and telling new job I changed my mind, but it’s too late for that now. And would be seriously unprofessional - very tight industry.

I did the whole interview process over zoom, and will be joining via zoom, and potentially my clients will want me to work via zoom too!! That’s an added element of anxiety, I have really good friends at work.

I work about 40-50 hours a week so it is my social life too and now I will be probably doing the same hours, but with strangers who I can’t have the odd banter with and talk nonsense to when we are in a lull in a workshop etc

@Gladioli23

I am firmly of the belief that you should be terrified for a good 3 months after starting a job - at least at intervals - or you could have applied for a more senior job.

However, it sounds like it's impacting your ability to perform, do you think something like beta blockers would help? They'd stop the physical manifestation of the anxiety which can then reduce the anxiety itself.

I am open to anything to get rid of this feeling of utter calumny!

*calamity

This is exactly what being out of your comfort zone feels like

Growth is uncomfortable. It's only in Hollywood movies that the main character strides confidently into every new challenge without a hint of anxiety, fear or self-doubt.

You will do brilliantly op. You are certainly qualified for the job or they wouldn't have picked you. Try to channel your inner Trump or Boris Johnson and go in there truly believing you are the smartest and most talented person in the room and they are lucky to have you.

@Gladioli23 “ I am firmly of the belief that you should be terrified for a good 3 months after starting a job” I love this than you xxx

@Littlewhiteballs

‘ Trump or Boris Johnson and go in there truly believing you are the smartest and most talented person in the room and they are lucky to have you’

I can certainly rock some unkempt hair - thanks

I just need to change my whole game face. One of my analysts fed back to me that I say a lot “it might be my small mind, but I have x opinion” she said I rock and I don’t have a tiny mind and should not be put off speaking it

I stopped saying that phrase and went into my shell for a couple of weeks too.. I truly have imposter syndrome and need a real solution before I ruin my career

Do it! You will be fine. Yes, it will be stressful but you can do it. I also bagged my dream job 2 months ago and was a bag of nerves. It's challenging but I love it and so pleased I had the courage to quit old job and get this one. I am being pushed but it is good, I am learning loads and very happy. You will be too! Btw if you have physical anxiety symptoms, sweating, palpitations, no sleep you may be prescribed something by gp. I take propanalol for anxiety and it helps with physical symptoms of anxiety.

Progress should feel uncomfortable, you need to go out of your comfort zone a little to move forward. When I’m feeling like this I pretend to feel confident, fake it til you make it! Easier said than done but try not to stress about it now.

Perhaps try to use your time thinking about your plan if it does go terribly and you feel you’ve made a mistake. My friend did something similar and actually went back to his old employers after 3 months when he felt it wasn’t working out.

Think about using a coach or mentor - it will help you enormously to realise your own capabilities - i wish someone had done this for me earlier in my career

Thank you for the people saying this is normal! The rational part of me is like I know what I need to do and I do it well. But I have a demon who is trying to sabotage me!

I am going into consultancy for the first time. I am going to be a senior consultant and one of the youngest.! Added pressure. It’s a discipline I know quite well but I have my own unpolished / niche way of making things work and that’s probs why I was hired 😂 but I am bot polished enough to teach anyone else -I think that’s my main fear

You will be fine and you can absolutely do this. You may find it useful to "name your fear" every so often. As in, literally say to yourself "I'm feeling nervous and like I can't do this, but I can and I will". Also keep a notebook and write a couple of lines each day about things that went well. It might sound naff but it honestly works to help you see that you not only can do it, you are actually doing it. If you can get a mentor that would be helpful too, or even chatting to someone more senior that you admire (maybe from your old job) - you'll be astonished at how many of them feel the same as you!

Definitely impostor syndrome. I second getting a mentor or coach. I've done this in the past and just started again and it really helps when going into new territory to have someone external who has your back.

Are there any TV shows or blogs or documentaries about your particular field? If there are, can you run through how you would react to a particular brief? How would you problem solve? What possible conclusions/outcomes would there be?
Just mentally running through hypothetical situations might help you to realise that you are not an imposter and that you have plenty of experience.

It is normal

What you need is one or both of an executive coach and/or some CBT to manage your thinking processes. A coach is genuinely a good idea and not OTT - the first 100 days in a job is tough.

Popping pills won’t help in your case honestly.

Plus the usual stress management (Ranjan chatterjee’s 4 pillars Is good for this.

Also are you getting a holiday bf you start?

[quote WorkWorries1]@Littlewhiteballs

‘ Trump or Boris Johnson and go in there truly believing you are the smartest and most talented person in the room and they are lucky to have you’

I can certainly rock some unkempt hair - thanks

I just need to change my whole game face. One of my analysts fed back to me that I say a lot “it might be my small mind, but I have x opinion” she said I rock and I don’t have a tiny mind and should not be put off speaking it

I stopped saying that phrase and went into my shell for a couple of weeks too.. I truly have imposter syndrome and need a real solution before I ruin my career[/quote]
See you are catastrophising here lady, hence CBT suggestion

You absolutely do need to running yourself down, but it is not going to ruin your career. Chill.

I do know a good CBT person if you want to PM me

… do need to STOP running yourself down

Propranolol (beta blocker) could help. There’s another long thread on it from a few months ago. In very similar circumstances it helped me enormously. Good luck 😄😄👍🏻👍🏻