To think that some people write threads then delete before sending?

[PaperScissors]

AIBU to think that some people write threads then delete them because they don't feel their problems are important enough for this forum?

FYI I've written and deleted 3 long, moany and predominantly meandering posts about my shitty life/problems tonight before I've posted them.

Is it just me, or AIBU?

I don’t know if it’s so much because they think it isn’t important enough, probably more because some posters on Mumsnet are horrible and they don’t want to get flamed

i do it, mostly because i don't want it appearing in the fail.

If people only posted about important problems, AIBU would be a ghost town

Maybe some people feel some problems are too much @WorraLiberty I deleted mine because they were doom and gloom x1000

YANBU - I've done it before (three angry paragraphs going "AIBU to be furious about this, I am totally in the right of course and I was being SO reasonable and" - and then hit Preview and think, ooops, maybe I was overreacting there!)

YABU to think your problems are too unimportant for MN though. People post about parking and hedges and paperclips! Whatever you're dealing with, it sounds bigger than that.

Probably yes. Some people might also find that once they’ve unjumbled it from their head and it’s laid out clearly in text they feel better, or have an idea of how to proceed so don’t need to end up posting.

I think sometimes when you write something down and re-read it you see it from a clearer perspective or you realise the exact finds of responses you're going to get and that either helps solve your own problem or you realise you just don't have the mental energy to fight your own corner.

I think you are right @Sparklesocks. Once I started to lay things out I became more rational, less upset and then thought posting was unnecessary. Also, I really hate a fuss and having to explain myself.

I used to do that a lot until my finger once knocked the post button and my silly little moan was posted and ripped to shreds. I NCed after it.

Ah, ShinyPikachu, I NC'd before this.

@WorraLiberty

If people only posted about important problems, AIBU would be a ghost town

Agree. "My MIL buys too many gifts. Can we ever forgive her?"

That's an obvious "no" there, Madison. Clearly.

I just find that when I have a real meltdown about something, that suddenly I link everything crap in my life together and feel that I need to get it out. Then a more rational me takes over and realises that my problems aren't important to anyone else, and it's only me hanging on to a string of unpleasant events in my past, that aren't really linked at all. Just me. Finding shit to moan about.

I have written and deleted before posting. I get worried that I did not word it right . I write differently when I feel stressed or emotional. Although MN is full of lovely supportive people. There are also posters that seem to attack and cause pile ons . Which can be awful when your already having a difficult time . So that could cause me to delete before posting.

Other times it could be that I answered my own question as I was typing. Or it could be that once I wrote it down I could think actually just writing it down was enough for me . So then don't post it.

Everyone's posts are so different there are so many different subjects. No ones posts matter less than anyone else.

I've been a member for about 15 years.
I've posted 2 problems in that whole time.
First post I got some really good advice that helped a lot.
Second post, a NDN one, I was flamed. Told I was making things up. Hadn't called the police despite having them attend my property and having a crime number.
My third post was a reply about dealing with my DD as a teenager. I was accused of being an abusive parent. I was threatened with being reported. I was called some horrible, nasty names.
That really affected my mental health and my relationship with my DD.

Because of the things said on here I was convinced I was a terrible parent.

I changed my account and now focus my time on my family, my friends and volunteer.

And yes, I did preview and delete this post several times before finally posting it and yes I did discuss it with family and friends.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that parts of this site can be and are very toxic that could and should be better maintained by admin.

As previously stated on other threads by many other users - it's all about the advertising money.

I do this with everything, threads, comments, text messages