Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

single parents. COVID+ve.WFH.school and nursery.

41 replies

wombleflump · 02/01/2022 14:39

I am a single parent. I am alone waiting for a court case to relocate back to family and friends. I am non contact with my ex with a injunction. I have no one to help me.

I have just tested positive for COVID. I am slightly confused by all the changing rules. I have no one to take DC to her school and DS to nursery. It’s a car ride away and presuming I can’t take them (it’s quite a busy area. So would seem wrong to take them myself). DD missed last week of term due to DAndV bug so is bad she can’t go. she is also currently refusing PCR though I will order
Her the home one.

I am wfh so far I’m feeling ok so can continue to
WFH. I am supposed to do a meeting though and I don’t think I can because colleagues complained
The last time in lockdown about kids noise in background. I know this will leave colleagues in lurch to cover this huge post holiday meeting. Should I just call
In sick or offer to do it but say will be interruptions. None of my colleagues know I’ve been single
For year without support. We have been WFH since 2020 so haven’t told anyone.

OP posts:
KiloWhat · 02/01/2022 14:49

I'd just say you can do the meeting but there may be child noise. How old is DS?

KiloWhat · 02/01/2022 14:51

DS might be ok to play in their cot/bed if they are old enough and you have a monitor

Don't feel you have to tell them anything though. If anyone complains then explain to your boss.

Yuledo · 02/01/2022 14:53

Make sure you get the credit for continuing to work when you are ill.

Original poster
wombleflump · 02/01/2022 14:53

No he’s 4 not a baby but they complained about noise last time like being interrupted by moaning playing
With toys etc

OP posts:
WorriedGiraffe · 02/01/2022 14:54

If you can’t do it without interruptions (by bribing the kids in a different room) then I’d call in sick, you do have covid so it’s not really a lie, although you could explain you can’t send your kids into school and can’t access other childcare so have to take parental leave if you’d rather. But if you can’t stop your kids interrupting then you can’t attend the meeting really.

Original poster
wombleflump · 02/01/2022 14:55

Also his sister may be around and they scrap a
Bit and are
Always asking for snacks etc as
The meeting will last 3 to 4 hours .

OP posts:
KiloWhat · 02/01/2022 14:55

I'd give them the choice then. And they can moan all they like what are you meant to do about it!

WorriedGiraffe · 02/01/2022 14:56

3-4 hours is far too long to be in an important meeting while you are in sole care of your kids OP, it’s a shame but all employers will be dealing with covid related absences at the min, it’s just once of those things.

KiloWhat · 02/01/2022 14:56

Ah yes missed DC. Is she old enough to look after him a bit?

Original poster
wombleflump · 02/01/2022 14:57

No she is young also and they can’t stay quite for that long!

OP posts:
Original poster
wombleflump · 02/01/2022 14:59

I did it last lockdown when schools / nursery shut but everyone moaned so I said I wouldn’t do it
Again. They are a great flexible employer and are
Letting me WFH indefinitely which is a lifeline being a single parent so don’t like to let them down

OP posts:
MoiraNotRuby · 02/01/2022 15:02

Depends on the nature of the meeting. I would turn up and put in the chat "hello please accept my apologies in advance for coming and going during the meeting, due to noise beyond my control". And then dip in and out where you can, add things into the chat rather than speaking your comments. This is what I did when my neighbours were building an extension.

Hope you feel OK and manage to juggle things.

Original poster
wombleflump · 02/01/2022 15:03

It’s not that kind of meeting it’s one I have to actively present issues on my screen . Not a blah blah business meeting you can dip in and out of

OP posts:
Chronicallymothering · 02/01/2022 15:04

Call in sick. A 3 hour meeting with a child that young won’t work- do the prep work for the meeting and send it onto someone in plenty of time for them to cover it on your behalf if you feel well enough.

Tee20x · 02/01/2022 15:06

It's not really letting them down as there's nothing you can do about it. Give them the choice - attend meeting with potential for interruptions, or phone in sick. Then it's up to them to pick which they'd prefer.

Would you be able to explain the situation and say you could attend but would need say a 10 min break just to check on the kids etc. May be easier to explain to the kids that they need to try and keep it down for an hour and then you'll check on them rather than just have them darting in and out?

Personally if it was me I'd just phone in sick though.

SummerHouse · 02/01/2022 15:07

You are totally justified to call in sick / take parental leave or offer to do the meeting with the proviso that there may be interruptions. I would have a very honest conversation with your boss. If your DC test positive in say, a week, that's a fair stretch of them being at home.

Sorry this is totally rubbish with no good solutions.

Original poster
wombleflump · 02/01/2022 15:08

No point prepping whoever does it needs to do the prep. I guess will have to call sick and I can still work the rest of the week just say I can’t do the meeting because of the kids.

OP posts:
Pebbledashery · 02/01/2022 15:08

I think I wouldn't do a half job, just call in sick and explain the issues, if they suggest that you can still present with children's noises in the background then that's their call. Some people would find it unprofessional.

Atlanticli · 02/01/2022 15:09

Tell them you have covid and are sick.

I had no choice but to WFH when my young DC had covid. It was 2 days of pure hell and I'd never do it again but again, me taking the time off would have led to consequences which I couldn't afford.

You'll get zero recognition of having worked through this (and you shouldn't feel you need to). Absolutely no one will be let down. Don't bother attempting it. Just have the time off.

Covidclaire · 02/01/2022 15:10

@Yuledo

Make sure you get the credit for continuing to work when you are ill.
OP said she feels fine.

I was perfectly well enough to work when j and covid but the issue was no childcare so I get it OP. I think you probably need to be honest with your manager as 3-4 hours straight will be too unpredictable in my view.

Clymene · 02/01/2022 15:12

You have Covid. You can't do that kind of meeting and supervise small children. Call in sick

drspouse · 02/01/2022 15:12

If you have tested positive you are totally NBU to call in sick.
For getting your school child in, if they test negative the school may have some suggestions e.g. a TA that lives near you.

Original poster
wombleflump · 02/01/2022 15:13

Yes I guess. It’s rubbish timing really because my helpful colleague who helps me and visa versa is on holiday abroad . You may be right about the zero recognition though! I will work the rest of the week though as long as I stay well. Just take the meeting day off.

OP posts:
TheSnowyOwl · 02/01/2022 15:14

Just tell your manager the situation and either take unpaid leave or arrange work that you can do for now.

Can a neighbour, friend or someone from school help with pick ups and drop offs for now? Most people have been in a similar situation or will be, so plenty are willing to help out. Good luck.

Darbs76 · 02/01/2022 15:16

The mute button is your friend