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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Would you allow this... covid related.

16 replies

KCee30 · 31/12/2021 21:25

Just curious really.

My sibling is going out for some drinks tonight with a friend. My siblings friend is crashing at my parents house after as can't book a taxi to get home.

Siblings friends partner has covid and is at home isolating. Tested positive 2-3 days ago.

I know as a double jabbed person you don't have to isolate with no symptoms and negative tests. They haven't done a pcr as can't get one, so just done lft's. From my experience over the last month lft's can be hit and miss. We all had covid recently and they were accurate with 2 out of 4 of us.

Siblings friend isn't legally doing anything wrong. But I feel it's totally inappropriate. My parents don't want them staying but sibling has insisted as friend can't get home and has no choice.

Why not stay home ffs? If you can't get a taxi, don't drink or stay home!

I know my sibling could catch it from their friend whilst out anyway but seems daft to let him stay in the house too. It's exposing them all rather than just my sibling. I have vulnerable relatives who my family see a lot of. Elderly grandma who my parents care for.

Half my family see also unvaccinated. Parents are tripled jabbed, 1 sibling double jabbed and the other 2 not so.

Their partner only tested positive 2-3 days ago so they could well have it and it's too soon to tell.

Legally nothing is wrong just doesn't feel right.

If my Dp had covid (he actually did recently). I would absolutely not stay in someone's house nor would I expect so. Like when Dp had covid I am certain my parents would not have allowed me in their house. I just wouldn't do it.

I appreciate this is nothing to do with me but makes me feel a little edgy.

I know it's rife and you can pick it up from anywhere...

Aibu?

OP posts:

bobbie42 · 31/12/2021 21:27

YANBU - it's totally inappropriate - i.e. partner of someone with COVID going to sleep over at your parents house.

Original poster

KCee30 · 31/12/2021 21:33

@bobbie42

YANBU - it's totally inappropriate - i.e. partner of someone with COVID going to sleep over at your parents house.

It is a bit odd imo. Dp had covid back in early December. I took a week for me to test positive.

He could test positive in the next couple days and the whole household would be deemed close contacts.

I'd let him sleep... in the shed 😅

OP posts:

Darbs76 · 31/12/2021 21:36

Yes highly irresponsible. When we had covid in the house (second time, I had it few months ago) I let everyone know I was planning to meet so they had a chance to say no with no pressure. It’s highly irresponsible and I wouldn’t let him stay at my house

Leeds2 · 31/12/2021 21:37

Your parents should say no. Their house, their rules.

Alcfreejan · 31/12/2021 21:41

You are absolutely not being unreasonable. If the friend with household COVID wants to go out they need to go home after, or sleep in a tent in the garden

Original poster

KCee30 · 31/12/2021 21:44

@Leeds2

Your parents should say no. Their house, their rules.

Absolutely. I think they were guilt tripped as they agreed a few days ago when no mention of covid and wasn't mentioned until it was to late today. I'd still say bugger it and find another way home or sleep outside. Or not go out at all in the first place.

OP posts:

Bluebluemoon · 31/12/2021 21:45

It depends how scared you are to catch what is, for 99% of people, a very mild illness.

Would you have stopped the friend staying if her dp had another virus or a cold etc?

Of course it is your dp's house and their prerogative. But as you say yourself, they could catch it anywhere.
We've had ds home from uni with covid 3 weeks ago now and no one else has caught it (6 of us in the house) and we haven't isolated him or been particularly careful.

If you're dsis is hanging out with her friend it stands to reason that she would be the one to catch it from her friend should the friend have it. So it wouldn't really matter whether the friend stayed over or not would it? Try to think rationally about it.

LyndaLaHughes · 31/12/2021 22:20

Personally I think your sibling is being selfish as with omicron whole households,regardless of vaccine status are coming down with it. She is a risk and whilst legally doing nothing wrong- morally she should be limiting her movements and being more careful. My sister infected both me and my parents on Christmas Day. We tested negative the next two days but sure enough were positive after that. I know if friends where it has taken a week or more for other members to test positive - but they have eventually. So yes this whole situation is not acceptable.
Having said that- unless you remain housebound- this variant is so transmissible that you cannot hide from it.
What I will say is that my elderly father has zero symptoms, I've had hardly anything and my mum has had a mild cold. My sister is worse but doing ok.

Whoopsmahoot · 31/12/2021 22:35

I’d say a definite no

lljkk · 31/12/2021 22:36

I kind of think this is a choice that OP's parents made & OP should let that household make their own decisions. It pisses me off when adult DC accuse/resent each other of/for being selfish, just adds to my stress, which is worse than any covid hypothetical for me. Give me agency & stop trying to control me.

LessTime · 31/12/2021 22:47

I wouldn’t like that either. We had a household member have Covid and we didn’t isolate but we also didn’t go out socializing.

If the friend stays over maybe he could at least stay clear of everyone in the house. If he is just staying to sleep then he doesn’t have to mix with them

Lifeispassingby · 31/12/2021 22:53

The advice as a close contact is to reduce social contacts unless necessary and this is not the case with your siblings friend

mum11970 · 31/12/2021 23:06

Depends on the age of your parents and how vulnerable they are. We are in our early 50s and the same scenario could easily arise in our house and we wouldn’t have an issue. There’s a good chance your parents won’t even see your sibling’s friend if they come in late tonight and then leave in the morning.

SpellBounds · 31/12/2021 23:08

@Leeds2

Your parents should say no. Their house, their rules.

This. Why are they allowing it?

pinkstripeycat · 31/12/2021 23:11

My eldest was positive 2 weeks before I got covid. My DH got it after a week and our eldest 10 days after youngest. Takes a while to catch/transmit/show. My niece took it to her mums Xmas day and her mum has only tested positive today

WildNorthEast · 31/12/2021 23:56

Irresponsible and selfish behaviour. Even though it is just a minor cold for most and hopefully would be just that for your parents (but who knows?), it does mean that if your parents catch it, they'll have to put their lives on hold and be stuck indoors for days on end, not being allowed to leave the house. Which is just incredibly annoying.

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