AIBU to ask: much weight did you give your relationship in your early 20s?

[flosnit]

Be completely honest with me!

I'm 22, about a year in. Things were perfect and now after a year there are a few issues... Ie, communication issues.

I love him but also I think I need a reality check. I saw us getting married, etc, but I am also wondering realistically how much time and commitment to give to a relationship at this age when we are having significant communication issues.

I think I need to give my head a wobble.

So, if you were 22, in a relationship with significant communication issues (them, not you), how much time and effort do you put into a one year relationship?

Please, please don’t settle at 22 ! You’ve got so much life to live yet.
Make sure your contraception is bomb proof.

If you are having communication issues that it’s not your forever relationship. That doesn’t mean it can’t be the relationship for now though.

There were quite a few men between me being 22 and when I got married in my 30’s, maybe only one of them (besides DH) I would have considered for long long term!

I started dating my now DH at 22 - but we were in the honeymoon stage at that point, I would absolutely not have stayed if there were serious problems. In fact, just generally, our relationship has never felt like hard work, it has always been more fun than hard

What are the communication issues? That's the key point.

I met my DH at 19. We were together all through university. At 22 we'd graduated and were long distance while we got jobs and figured out our next life steps.

We struggled and now I can't quite remember what the issues were but we decided to have a break for a bit. We hated it and were back together again within 2 weeks.

We've been together now almost 19 years and married for 10. There has been hard times during that where we've had to have deep conversations and make some effort but there has never been anything too hard we couldn't overcome.

Holy shit I was far too busy having a fantastic life to give any weight to any individual!

I was establishing my career, travelling the world, buying fabulous clothes and shoes, that’s how much weight I invested..,shoes were my priority not some bloke who had me rolling my eyes even once!!

Get out there, live life, don’t invest until it’s worth investing in. Honestly, do not waste any precious time on this!!