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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Flying gazebo CF or AIBU

50 replies

motormummy · 30/12/2021 21:23

The neighbours gazebo took off in the wind, blew across the road and landed on two of our vehicles parked on our drive. Minor (£70) damage to one but our low value kids learner car had £400 of deep scratches needing professional repair on 3 panels.
It has taken me the best part of 5 months to sort out getting the work completed on both vehicles, but they are done now. I have kept the neighbours in the loop as to when and where work was being done.
My eldest son was leaning to drive at the time the damage occurred, and the neighbours as an interim payment gave him £200 towards the work.
As the car was having the gazebo damage repaired, I thought it would be practical at the same time to get a couple of unrelated previous minor dinks/ scuffs sorted at the same time and at my own expense. The car is red so it’s never going to look perfect but it certainly looks much nicer now.
I’d had a couple of quotes for the gazebo damage at £400, and the additional work was another £400, which I was prepared to pay myself so no issue there.
But, my neighbours are now saying they don’t think they should have to pay the outstanding £200 for the gazebo damage.
They have paid the £70 for the other vehicle damage, but what has now really upset me is they have insisted on seeing the receipt for the work done on the learner car as if I’m trying to rip them off. Nothing wrong in asking to see the receipt, it’s the manner in which it has been asked for that is the problem, and I’m not asking for more than the damage cost to repair.
They can see the car and I’d told them how much the quotes had been for. Of course I have the receipt for £800 and they can see it, but it’s the principle of the thing now.
If I went to their house and jumped on their car bonnet I wouldn’t expect to only pay half of the damage I’d caused. I feel so hurt and dismayed by their current attitude that I don’t really want to go back and discuss it any more. I just wanted to cry when I got home earlier.
I think maybe they assumed wrongly I wouldn’t get the car repaired as it’s just a little old learner car, and bunging a teenager some cash would be the end of the matter. AIBU to expect them to pay the outstanding £200 or should I just walk away in the interest of neighbourhood harmony?

OP posts:
TractorAndHeadphones · 30/12/2021 21:42

You should have gotten a second receipt but that doesn’t really matter.
YANBU for expecting them to pay, show them the receipt and say what you’ve posted here

Bingbangbongbash · 30/12/2021 21:42

This is why you have insurance. Let them deal with it. Save the heartache and neighbourly concerns and leave professionals to sort it out.

user1471442488 · 30/12/2021 21:56

You’re “hurt” by their attitude? Grow up.

Show them the receipt and tell them they owe you £200, end of story.

AdobeWanKenobi · 30/12/2021 22:09

TBH I think you did well to get £200. Most people would have told you to claim on the car insurance, and a few might even have said they would pay the insurance excess for you.

LittleOwl153 · 30/12/2021 22:14

I wouldn't give in, because otherwise what else will they walk all over you on? I'd send them the invoice, perhaps with a note of your bank details and give then a timescale. If not paid then hopefully you have the paperwork for small claims... I hate people who think they can pull this kind of shit on kids.

Itsalmostanaccessory · 30/12/2021 22:16

Should have gone through insurance.

You didnt so fine but showing them the recipet is the minimum if you do it yourself. You could make up any price. Of course the need to see the invoice. You should have had separate invoices for that damage.

Stiffcondomhat · 30/12/2021 22:20

Yanbu. People with unsecured gazebos and trampolines etc get right on my wick! In the unlikely event that mine broke free I would be falling over myself to pay for damages.

NeedAHoliday2021 · 30/12/2021 22:36

It’ll be called “an act of god” and your car insurance pays so neighbours not liable. Then you can take them to small claims court with evidence they didn’t anchor it properly. (We had this re a fence panel hitting a neighbour’s car).

ForensicFlossy · 30/12/2021 22:58

YANBU to expect to be paid but they anbu to want to see the invoice.

KrisAkabusi · 30/12/2021 23:03

Of course they're asking for a receipt! You're charging them money, they want to make sure that you're not ripping them off. It's nothing personal, who hands over money for any reason without proof?

MajorCarolDanvers · 30/12/2021 23:21

Why on earth did you not let your insurance company deal with this?

HiJenny35 · 30/12/2021 23:33

They didn't have to pay at all. Yes it's disgraceful but it actually goes on your car insurance. It counts as a act of god and you have to pay on your car insurance not them. I've been in exactly this situation and couldn't believe it.

Sunsetsupernova · 30/12/2021 23:36

Oh god something like this nearly happened to us. We’d gone out for the day and didn’t realise a storm was on its way. It was so strong it completely broke free from where we’d secured it that it flew into the neighbours garden.
I was absolutely mortified but thanking my lucky stars it hadn’t blown the other way into the parked cars. Personally I’d have thought £800 was getting off lightly and would have paid you straight away.

AffIt · 30/12/2021 23:47

How much is your 'wee learner car' worth?

My car - the main household car - is an 11-year-old Mazda valued at about £5k, and to be honest, I don't think I'd bother with £800 of repairs, unless they were fairly mechanically fundamental. From a cosmetic PoV, no way.

AffIt · 30/12/2021 23:48

Sorry, £400 worth of cosmetic damage, my mistake.

Unless it was a Maserati, I'd just have cracked out the T-Cut.

fallfallfall · 30/12/2021 23:51

all that needed to be done via your insurance company. you're lucky you got what you did from them.

Original poster
motormummy · 31/12/2021 00:03

Krisakabussi, User 1471 and ForensicFlossy:

‘Nothing wrong in asking to see the receipt, it’s the manner in which it has been asked for that is the problem, and I’m not asking for more than the damage cost to repair.’

Just to add that I’d told them weeks ago how much the quotes were (£400), and they didn’t ask to see the receipt for the £70 for the other vehicle. These are neighbours I’ve had a good relationship with for 4-5 years, and what ‘hurt’ was the implication that I was not being honest.
If the situation was reversed I would do/ feel the same as Supernova

Thank you everybody, I’ll brace myself and try again tomorrow

OP posts:
Original poster
motormummy · 31/12/2021 00:13

Thank you Affit, but these were not small scratches. I’d have used T cut if I could have but it was down to the metal across three panels and really long too. It was a huge heavy gazebo about 10mt x4mt. We were really lucky there wasn’t more damage in which case it would indeed have been an insurance claim.

OP posts:
BashfulClam · 31/12/2021 00:24

I would never pay without a receipt.

unfortunateevents · 31/12/2021 00:41

We were really lucky there wasn’t more damage in which case it would indeed have been an insurance claim. - what do you mean by "more damage"?! It was already £470 of damage and should have gone through insurance which would have saved the angst now.

AutumnLeaves21 · 31/12/2021 00:43

I would have told you to go through insurance. YABU and taking their weirdly personally.

gingerbiscuits · 31/12/2021 01:20

I don't understand what the issue is - show them the receipt & get your money. Why are you reduced to tears about it?

They owe you. You've done everything right. If they want to get arsey about it, that's their problem.

liveforsummer · 31/12/2021 06:25

I don't see why an insurance claim is a bad thing - in fact it's what should have been some anyway surely. It's insane to have paid £800 cash for a kids leaner vehicle. Is the car even worth that? Why are you upset the neighbour wants to see the receipt? It's a perfectly normal thing to ask for before paying such a large amount of money, £70 probably not bothered but £400 is a different matter.

SmallElephant · 31/12/2021 06:33

Sorry you're upset OP, but I do think you're taking this a bit too personally. Of course they would want to see the receipt, and to be upset about the "manner" they're asking for it is silly. I'm sure you have been honest but it's completely reasonable for them to need to be sure of that before giving you the money.

KiloWhat · 31/12/2021 06:54

Thing is if the car has had a full on makeover they will be sightly suspicious they've paid for that. Just show them the receipt. Is it itemised?