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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would this annoy you?

37 replies

SudokuRules · 30/12/2021 19:36

Dh made dinner. It was lovely, and I had seconds. I told him a number of times itnwas lively and I appreciate him making dinner.

The following conversation then occurred.
Dh: did you finish your seconds? Yes? Then can i tell you something?

Me: sure.

Dh: don't you ever, ever, tell me again you dont Like turkey. Cos that's what was in it!

Me: well yes I can. Cos that was a pie with other stuff. I still don't like turkey by itself as it is dry and flavourless.

Dh:well you DO like turkey, just not plain.

Me: OK fine, but not plain and don't talk to me like that, don't you ever etc. and treat me like a child

Dh: i wasn't, it was just a conversation, nothing to get annoyed about fgs.

And walked off.

Aibu?

OP posts:
ArblemarzipanTFruitcake · 30/12/2021 19:38

Yes it would - childish point scoring.

Why does it matter whether you like turkey or not?

ClandestineAdulation · 30/12/2021 19:39

I don’t think YABU.

Have you made a big deal about not liking Turkey before?! It sounds like it annoys him for some reason Shock

Original poster
SudokuRules · 30/12/2021 19:39

Yeah that's kind if how i saw it. And tone is hard to convey, but it was don't you ever, pause, ever pause, tell me...

OP posts:
DrSbaitso · 30/12/2021 19:40

Did he lie to you about what you were eating?

And yes, annoying.

Justheretoaskaquestion91 · 30/12/2021 19:41

I would find it hard to be annoyed about this. You ate something with Turkey in it and enjoyed it - so you can eat Turkey at times.

Original poster
SudokuRules · 30/12/2021 19:42

@ClandestineAdulation

I don’t think YABU.

Have you made a big deal about not liking Turkey before?! It sounds like it annoys him for some reason Shock

Not really. I mean I mention it at Christmas. Cos that's the only time we ever have it. And always cook too much food. And this year I said, why a whole turkey crown as 2/5 won't eat it, get something smaller. But Christmas is literally the only time turkey is ever discussed!
OP posts:
WorriedGiraffe · 30/12/2021 19:42

The whole ‘don’t you ever’ is just unnecessary. You sound very defensive for no actual reason. YABU

Original poster
SudokuRules · 30/12/2021 19:44

@DrSbaitso

Did he lie to you about what you were eating?

And yes, annoying.

Didn't lie, was just presented with dinner. Ate without complaint.

And of course I can eat it sometimes, I am an adult, not a fussy child. It's just something I wouldn't choose to eat plain.

Like i said, I wasn't the turkey, per se. It was the don't you ever ever bit.

OP posts:
Original poster
SudokuRules · 30/12/2021 19:45

@WorriedGiraffe

The whole ‘don’t you ever’ is just unnecessary. You sound very defensive for no actual reason. YABU
If don't you ever is unnecessary, why am I defensive? Or am.i misunderstanding?
OP posts:
SeasonFinale · 30/12/2021 19:47

Turkey is not dry and flavourless if cooked properly.

*misses point of thread

NavaniKholinRocks · 30/12/2021 19:47

Oh that would really have got my back up. At best it sounds like he was being really condescending, at worst… maybe even a bit intimidating?

For contrast, we often say to our DD (who is 6) that what she’s just enjoyed eating contains something that she declares she doesn’t like, e.g. garlic or spinach, but it’s done in a straightforward matter-of-fact way as we’re hoping to help her expand the range of food she will try, and enjoy. It’s never done so we can say “ha ha” to her for enjoying something she said she dislikes before.

In summary, sounds like he was a twit? Hopefully he’s not usually given to that sort of behaviour?

Original poster
SudokuRules · 30/12/2021 19:48

@SeasonFinale Grin ds - the one who will eat turkey, glanced at the turkey on the table at Christmas, and I quote...
"Man didn't even season the fucking turkey" and refused to eat it. Down to 2/5...

OP posts:
MyPatronusIsASnowman · 30/12/2021 19:48

It's not about not liking turkey, it's about not liking something cooked a certain way. For instance tinned tuna is massively different to a whole tuna steak. I'd be annoyed as well OP Xmas Confused

IncompleteSenten · 30/12/2021 19:49

I'd be pissed off too. Don't you ever ever tell me you don't like turkey.
🙄 He is very childish.

GreatResetRequested · 30/12/2021 19:52

What a childish jackass he is.

Kite22 · 30/12/2021 19:52

Really not something I could get worked up about.
He is probably just mystified at you not liking turkey, so was trying a different way of cooking it to see if you liked it that way.

gettingolderandgrumpy · 30/12/2021 20:04

I think you were both childish .

RobotValkyrie · 30/12/2021 20:06

He sounds bonkers.

Stiffcondomhat · 30/12/2021 20:08

I think you both could be suffering twixtmas stress. Over eating, lack of structure and seeing too much of each other can take a toll on some people more than others!

Original poster
SudokuRules · 30/12/2021 20:12

Tbf, I couldn't give a zhit about the sodding turkey. Dinner was nice I mean, he is a better cook than me, I can just about manage a microwave!

It was more the way he spoke to me that annoyed me.

OP posts:
thickthighs73 · 30/12/2021 20:13

What a pointless thread honestly

Original poster
SudokuRules · 30/12/2021 20:13

@Stiffcondomhat

I think you both could be suffering twixtmas stress. Over eating, lack of structure and seeing too much of each other can take a toll on some people more than others!
He works from home anyway. And I work retail, only had 2 days off so no lack of structure tbh.
OP posts:
ChristmasRobins · 30/12/2021 20:15

Seems like you’re both making something out of nothing.

LoannaJumley · 30/12/2021 20:16

I told him a number of times itnwas lively and I appreciate him making dinner

Why on earth do you have to tell him you appreciate him making dinner? He's feeding his wife.

Livpool · 30/12/2021 20:19

@LoannaJumley

I told him a number of times itnwas lively and I appreciate him making dinner

Why on earth do you have to tell him you appreciate him making dinner? He's feeding his wife.

Tbf I cook most nights and would be a bit pissed off it DH never thanked me for cooking. I'm not a servant!