Seeking advice

9 replies

oldfellah · 30/12/2021 08:54

I am seeking advice - I don't have children so I am resorting to mumsnet in hope of a fair answer - Scenario:
My step daughter visiting the UK tested positive for COVI around 20 Dec 2021. We believe she caught it at the wedding she attended. She has two young children (aged 7 and 9) and they helped carry her food etc to just outside her room while she isolated. On Christmas day, she decides that she feels much better and heads off to "isolate" with other covi inflicted wedding guests at a cottage 20 miles away. The grandkids are rowdy and we are old and I don't believe walking out on Christmas helped - on 28 December we put it to her to come back which she did. Question from me and the Grandmother - are we insane to think this behaviour is "off"? All responses and opinions appreciated.

OP posts:

inmyslippers · 30/12/2021 08:56

Which part is off? I thought isolation meant staying put. Where were the rowdy grandkids in all this

Xmasiscancelledagain · 30/12/2021 08:56

Hang on, she fucked off and left you with the grand kids on Christmas day? Then didn't come back for four days?

She's taking the mick out of you both. Those poor kids.

Tohaveandtohold · 30/12/2021 09:00

If she’s isolating at home, she can’t look after the children anyway so I feel what she did makes sense. This way she can stay with other people and not be stuck in a room. I even think it should be a relief for you as well because you don’t have to cook for her and try to avoid her, cleaning surfaces she has touched, etc

ChristmasRobins · 30/12/2021 09:04

I can see that she might have thought it made little difference if she couldn’t help look after the children as she was isolating. But she should still have consulted with you and with her poor children who presumably felt very upset that she left.

Is it possible that she was trying to do the right thing by reducing the risk of infecting you?

In any event, she shouldn’t have assumed that you would be ok caring for the children for four days. Is their father on the scene?

Returnoftheowl · 30/12/2021 09:21

@Xmasiscancelledagain

Hang on, she fucked off and left you with the grand kids on Christmas day? Then didn't come back for four days?

She's taking the mick out of you both. Those poor kids.

This is how I read it. If this is the case then she's definitely out of order. They are your partner's grandchildren, but she is their mother and can't just leave them at yours without any form of conversation. Also it says she is visiting the UK - does she visit often with the children? I'm just wondering if the children know you & your partner well? Or if she's dumped then on 2 people who might be strangers to them?

Original poster

oldfellah · 30/12/2021 19:16

Thanks so much everyone for taking the time to pen some thoughts - it seems there is a case for leaving the area but most responses seem to think this is super strange - we have seen the kids off and on about 10 times over the past 9 years - they have their pet names for us (gran and ...) , etc etc . I tried to provide just the facts to avoid tainting the responses. The 7 year old actually said "mommy has abandoned us". She gets here and we are essentially the unpaid babysitters while she catches up on mates from her teens and twenties - well that is my take on it, anyway. I don't want to sound bitter but she is a mid 30s , pretty and holding it back type that still hasn't grown up - self obsessed which I believe is a proxy for childish. My 2c. Again, I really appreciate all the responses - thanks

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ChristmasRobins · 30/12/2021 20:12

What does your wife make of it all?

Original poster

oldfellah · 30/12/2021 20:27

one word - distraught.

OP posts:

ChristmasRobins · 30/12/2021 20:31

It really does sound odd. Do you know how things are when they are at home?

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