My husband has always been prone to depressions or depressive moods. I think in his family its sort of genetic, his dad is bipolar and his granddad died in a mental institutions years ago. We've been together fifteen years and he's always had his ups and downs. We now also have a three year old with SEN - he is lovely but also hard work. It takes it out of us having to deal with him and realistically I am all spent. DH found the whole becoming a parent quite difficult. He loves our son but misses his old life. He feels stuck in the boring dull family life and is often very down about it but unlike before I just cant handle it anymore. In the past, I basically used to try and support him and also just spend more time on myself and seeing friends but now thats not possible. Instead I feel stuck between a demanding little boy who is my responsibility and a very grumpy husband who does more than his fair share but the atmosphere in the house is atrocious.
Not sure what am asking for really. I just cant keep on living like this. This Christmas holiday has just been awful as is usually the case when the three of us spend too much time together. My husband spirals into the usual - my life is over until he leaves home i.e. that he cant do what he wants, has to keep working at his dull job to make money, no time off etc ........ my son seems to be happy but i don't want him to grow up in an atmosphere of misery. Have thought about splitting up but genuinely don't think that I can afford it. We live in London and my salary is ok but not very high. I could also do with a spare pare of hands to manage DC and my full time job. But whenever we are together it's just miserable.