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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think my kids should play with their toys

17 replies

Pollyforever · 29/12/2021 10:47

Since Christmas day my kids have hardly played with any of their new toys. They've wanted to lie on the couch and watch hours of TV, they've bickered with each other. Any time we've asked them to go and play with their toys it's ended in tears and tantrums. What is going on?! When I was a child I played with my toys all day. They will follow me round crying that they don't want to play! I feel like giving it all away. Anyone else children doing this??

OP posts:

EllieSattler · 29/12/2021 10:50

Turn off the TV, hide the remotes, give them chores if they start bickering or moaning. Start a toy declutter as a nuclear option, it's astonishing how much they love that exact toy you were about to send to charity.

We played more in the olden days because it was only 4 channels and C4 horseracing, BBC2 was a shite black and white film, and the other two channels were equally boring. Kids today have no clue how lucky they are with cbbc and cbeebies and kids Netflix

JurgensCakeBabyJesus · 29/12/2021 10:54

We don't have the TV on unless there is something specific to watch, and rarely during the day. DS plays with his toys a lot, he's currently setting up an extravagant rescue scenario that seems to require several fire engines a helicopter, a large digger and a toy cat (as the main rescuer). Remove the screens and they have to use their imaginations. If he gets bored we'll play a game, read books with him or do something either outside or baking/painting etc

Justkeeppedaling · 29/12/2021 10:56

If they never play with toys maybe they need to be shown how. Try playing with them to start them off, and then gradually withdraw "I'm going to put the dishwasher on, I'll be back in a minute" etc.

Make a point of having the TV off for everyone for a few hours each day, at the same time so it's routine. You can start with 30 mins and build up. But if they see the adults in the house watching TV, that's "not fair".

toastofthetown · 29/12/2021 11:00

Could you rotate their toys? Possibly they are just overwhelmed by the amount of new toys they have so end up watching TV to avoid that. Like how I often end up watching something I’ve seen before on Netflix because the choice overload of new content is too much.

Beautiful3 · 29/12/2021 11:25

Agree with others saying turn off the TV! It's the only way to get them to go play.

Passthecake30 · 29/12/2021 11:26

How old are they?

Mine stopped playing around 9 yrs old

shouldistop · 29/12/2021 11:27

How old are they?

Turn off the tv and if they're under about 6 you might have to start off playing with them then once they're into the game you should be able to leave them to it.

Mol1628 · 29/12/2021 11:30

You need enforced screen/tv free time otherwise they’ll always choose the easy option. Turn off the tv and tell them to go play. Mine whinge for about 20/30 minutes then when they realise I’m ignoring them they find something to do.

Santahatesbraisedcabbage · 29/12/2021 11:30

Power cut?
Shame that!!

Ilikecheeseontoast · 29/12/2021 11:31

When you wake up tomorrow don’t even turn on the tv. That’s easier than switching it off in my experience. Set up some toys in a decluttered space... some Lego it a jigsaw for example. Play with them then gradually pull away once they are focused on their play. If they bicker, get them to play in separate rooms unless they are prepared to try to get along. Good luck, it’s bloody hard work!

SushiGo · 29/12/2021 11:32

Turn off the TV.

Play with them. Even if it's just getting started then nipping off to put laundry on and leaving them to it.

Possibly have a big toy clear out - sometimes there's just too many options, or if their toys are away and they can't see them them don't think to get them out.

Tal45 · 29/12/2021 11:37

Play with their toys with them, set up things for them to do ie set up painting or sort the edge pieces of a jigsaw for them to make on the table, alternatively set them challenges with the toys ie who can make an x, y or z out of lego. Make sure you buy toys that give them lots of opportunities to use their imagination in various ways or that will keep them occupied completing them or that you can play with them. Have strict limits on how much screen time they are allowed in a day.

Seedandyarn · 29/12/2021 11:40

It sounds like screen time needs to be curtailed and boundaries established. I find there is a lot less complaining if I stick firm to the rule screens are only allowed between set times that way their is no confusion.

Dammitthisisshit · 29/12/2021 11:44

How old are they?
Tv is off in this house unless there is a specific reason to be on.
So eg yesterday they had been cooped up for days and didn’t want to go out so we said if they go out for a bike ride then they could come back and watch a film with hot chocolate that afternoon.
Then screen time is 5pm, they choose what (usually Minecraft), if they have tidied up their toys, so they get an hour before dinner at about 6 (and gives us a chance to cook).
They can earn extra/lose screen time depending on behaviour, but it’s one of a range of bribes so we try not to make it the thing they hanker after (doesn’t always work, but that’s the theory).
Oh and we try to let them choose 1 activity a day that we ‘do with’ them. We don’t always do it at all but are around then when they do it. Could be a game, Fimo etc.

But they’re 6 and 7 so still bribable. How old are yours?

Original poster

Pollyforever · 29/12/2021 11:44

Thank you for your advice. I'm trying to find a home for their new things today so that they will hopefully play with them instead of them piling up. Will also keep the TV off tomorrow!
I'm usually pretty strict with the TV but we had weeks of endless bugs before Christmas and all we did was watch TV when we were unwell so it seems to have become a bad habit that I need to break!
I'll bring some toys down for each of them tonight that they can play with in the morning when they get up. They're 7, 5 and 3, I should have included their ages in the first post sorry!

OP posts:

MrsBouquet5678 · 29/12/2021 12:06

My children haven't stopped playing with their toys, we've had a little bit of time on the Nintendo switch and some Christmas films on TV of course but mainly playing luckily, hope they turn the TV off soon or they'll get square eyes! 😃, Sorry no idea why yours are not playing with their toys, maybe suggest to then donating them to a charity shop if FIND for kids who maybe would want them ...

Original poster

Pollyforever · 29/12/2021 12:08

I've already threatened to give them to children who don't have toys. This of course leads to more tears!
I dont know if we're all just a bit wound up and fed up maybe. One has gone for a nap, shes still not 100%. One is now painting and the other is watching. So an improvement on this morning at least. I'm trying desperately to organise their toys while they're occupied.

OP posts:

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