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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Work part time or work full time and take parental leave?

111 replies

Missmummy88 · 29/12/2021 08:03

I currently work part time ( have done for last three years ) three days per week have 3 children 10,6& 18months.

While baby is under 3 I will continue to work three days and consider going up to 4 when he is at nursery with 30 hour funding.

I always assumed I would work part time so that I could spend some time with kids during holidays. This obviously effects my pay quite substantially- 1. Because I work part time so get overlooked for head of x roles because of need to always be around to lead 2. Because i work 3/5 of my salary 3. I struggle to find a new job with salary jump part time (recently got offered a double salary job at a massive company but only wanted ft)

I just discovered about parental leave my understanding is up to 4 weeks per child per year with a max of 18 weeks per child over 18 years?

With three children I could take an extra 4 weeks holiday per year to cover Easter / summer and spend some time with my kids whilst also working my way up the ladder as a full time employee.

Has anyone done this? Obviously I would loose 4 weeks pay a year but they pales into insignificance when I look at the potential up swing working full time on double salary.

Aibu to go full time and just take lots of parental leave? Is there anything I should be aware of?

OP posts:

RoseMartha · 29/12/2021 08:27

The other issue would be if you need to take parental leave because your child is ill. And you have used it all on holiday leave.

I always thought parental leave unpaid was more for the purpose of medical reasons for your children.

Original poster

Missmummy88 · 29/12/2021 08:28

So in my current company once our time is taken off for Xmas (have to take it) we only get 17 days leave a year - this is so hard to juggle 12 weeks of school holiday! I can see your points, guess part time it is! Seems a waste to be sitting at home while kids are at school so I can be with them 12 weeks of the year!

OP posts:

AliMonkey · 29/12/2021 08:28

Employer can only refuse parental leave if they have good reason - and even then have to allow within six months. So if eg you ask for it for Feb half term and it’s refused then very likely to get it in summer holidays. I’d say to discuss with employer as part of interview process. Mine was generally happy to grant it as we tended to be less busy in summer hols as clients on holiday and saved employer money. But you need a back up plan eg DH taking parental leave, holiday club, other parents.

Brandnewnotepad · 29/12/2021 08:28

Hi.
I think what you are looking for is a contractual hours charge, and parental leave isn’t the right route. Have a think about putting in a flexible working request to move to ft hours, on a term time contract (or partial term time contract as it sounds like you don’t want all school hols off). A flex working request is a legal thing. Your employer must consider it, and can refuse it but only for certain reasons. I’ll find a link and post in a mo.

decisionsincisions · 29/12/2021 08:29

If you want those kinds of holidays go and retrain and become a teacher. If you can teach in a stem subject you'll no doubt get a bursary.

Parental leave is discretionary and I'm pretty sure it's there to support parents in the workplace with things like childcare emergencies, prolonged illness etc.

Remember you will have annual leave as well. So you are wanting 4 weeks parental leave and your accrued annual leave?? I don't think an employer would be happy about this.

Retrain and teach, it's awesome.

WouldIBeATwat · 29/12/2021 08:29

@RoseMartha

The other issue would be if you need to take parental leave because your child is ill. And you have used it all on holiday leave.

I always thought parental leave unpaid was more for the purpose of medical reasons for your children.

Technically OP has 3 x4 week parental leave entitlements per year.

You’re thinking of emergency/dependents’ leave, which wouldn’t be for more than a day or 2.

Brandnewnotepad · 29/12/2021 08:29

www.gov.uk/flexible-working/applying-for-flexible-working

WouldIBeATwat · 29/12/2021 08:30

@Brandnewnotepad

Hi. I think what you are looking for is a contractual hours charge, and parental leave isn’t the right route. Have a think about putting in a flexible working request to move to ft hours, on a term time contract (or partial term time contract as it sounds like you don’t want all school hols off). A flex working request is a legal thing. Your employer must consider it, and can refuse it but only for certain reasons. I’ll find a link and post in a mo.

OP won’t be entitled to this straight away if moving to another company.

And again, the company doesn’t have to agree it.

ThisOneNow · 29/12/2021 08:30

My understanding is that parental leave is there in case a child gets seriously ill or something like that and you need time off to be with them. It seems a bit risky to rely on no child ever needing a block of your time unexpectedly.

Brandnewnotepad · 29/12/2021 08:30

www.acas.org.uk/making-a-flexible-working-request

TinyLittlePandaSneeze · 29/12/2021 08:31

Yeah PP is right try a flexible working request instead?

Bookwormbitch · 29/12/2021 08:32

@Sirzy

So you expect preferential treatment because your a parent. And you can’t see how that could cause resentment?

She just asking a question about parental leave, which she is entitled to and is unpaid! No need to accuse her of wanting preferential treatment or of being selfish (as others have).

WouldIBeATwat · 29/12/2021 08:33

@ThisOneNow

Your understanding is wrong. Parental leave has to be booked in week-long chunks and agreed in advance.

It is not the same as emergency/dependents’ leave.

mygenericusername · 29/12/2021 08:33

Put your kids in childcare like every other full time working parent on the planet. It really isn’t very difficult.

Brandnewnotepad · 29/12/2021 08:33

Ah I didn’t spot the new job bit. Yes would need to either wait 26 weeks and do flex request (which they might deny obvs) Or just ask as part of the new job negotiations before joining. Lots of people negotiate salary, working hours etc. Really common and frankly they worst they can say is no and then you just don’t take the job.

AliMonkey · 29/12/2021 08:34

As we have busy times of year, my employer also allows some unusual working patterns eg work 4dpw Jan to April, 2dpw July to October , 3dpw rest of year. Or compressed hours in school holidays (so eg normally work 6 hours a day for 5 days but in holidays work 10 hours for 3 days). So look for an employer who is flexible like that?

WouldIBeATwat · 29/12/2021 08:35

Worth noting that if term-time working were agreed, OP would have no other leave entitlement to use at other times. So 13 weeks off but none at her discretion.

autieok · 29/12/2021 08:36

My understanding of parental leave was that it was for circumstances such as child illness/medical appointments not additional unpaid holiday. What would you do if your child gets sick and you have no leave? It depends on your employer and I guess it can't hurt to ask but I'd be surprised if they agree.

WouldIBeATwat · 29/12/2021 08:37

@Brandnewnotepad

Yet to meet a “Head of” working term time only (outside of education).

macaronip1e · 29/12/2021 08:37

I take a week of parental leave here and there to help cover school hols. A couple of thoughts:

I would avoid bunching them (eg taking 3 weeks over summer hols) as means you would only be paid half your salary over that time (ie paid for 3 of 6 weeks); better to mix and match with annual leave so you’re paid for some of it
as it’s discretionary I tend to ask for it when I know our work isn’t as busy or I know holiday requests are fewer (eg, I request at Feb and October half terms, and not over summer)

WouldIBeATwat · 29/12/2021 08:37

@autieok

Your understanding is wrong. Parental leave has to be booked in week-long chunks and agreed in advance.

It is not the same as emergency/dependents’ leave.

Original poster

Missmummy88 · 29/12/2021 08:37

Some confusion in this thread - dependents leave is for emergencies with your dependants. Parental leave is your entitlement as a parent to have unpaid leave. The gov grant this and I think it’s a bit harsh to suggest a parent is selfish for trying to juggle caring for children and earning money for children. We are all just trying our best - the judgment of some posters is unreal and just illustrates why being a working parent is so challenging

OP posts:

AliMonkey · 29/12/2021 08:37

A PP says parental leave has to be booked in week long chunks. Not true. You could book eg 3 days but would then lose the right to the other two. As I never intended to use up all of mine, I quite often did this just to make sure we could cover school holidays.

icedcoffees · 29/12/2021 08:38

@Missmummy88

The answer to that isn't a full-time job with parental leave over the summer, though.

Ask for term-time only or the option to flex your hours so you work fewer but longer days and therefore need less childcare.

WouldIBeATwat · 29/12/2021 08:38

www.gov.uk/parental-leave

Work part time or work full time and take parental leave?

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