Page 4 | Gillick competence

putthatdown · 2021-12-28T21:24:46+00:00

My DD had a large mole on her neck and we were able to get an appt to have it removed. At the pre-op meeting the dr asked my DD who is 10 what she preferred a general or local pain relief? She then asked me. DD said general as she wanted to go to sleep. I said local and the Dr wrote down General. Has the world gone completely mad. Since when did medics expect a 10yr old to know what pain relief they should have? Since when did my say as a parent become irrelevant. I feel like my role as a parent is being undermined and that the state is now taking responsibility for every area of my childs thinking! Scary times

countbackfromten · 29/12/2021 12:04

@EarthStoodHardAsPrion how insulting! You have no idea the experience level of any doctor based on how young they look!

lunar1 · 29/12/2021 13:13

My 10 year old is having a surgery soon. His surgeon explained it to him, gave him a choice. He asked a few questions and decided to have a GA.

DH and I weren't asked our opinion. It's his body and his choice. He's a bright child and the doctor took the time to explain.

His medical history isn't his choice, but I damn well will give him every little bit of control he's able to have over his treatments.

ErrolTheDragon · 29/12/2021 13:20

I think this is a case which is significantly different from some others, because it's not a matter of whether the child should have a treatment or not - it's a choice between two options, both of which the doctors are happy with.

Scarlettpixie · 29/12/2021 13:48

Why the massive drip feed?

In this case the parent wasn’t over ruled as your DH ‘insisted’ on a local and that was what happened. Presumably you could also insisted or at least discussed the pros and cons at the pre app appointment so your daughter had more information to inform her decision.

What you describe is the opposite of the state taking over your child’s thinking. They were trying to allow your child her OWN thinking which was then overruled by Dad!

I am surprised more info wasn’t given at the pre op appointment but then I would have asked.

EarthStoodHardAsPrion · 29/12/2021 14:13

@countbackfromten

Really? I agree not all older doctors are mature and competent, so it was something of a generalization. However this is the kind of error that would perhaps be understandable in a young, idealistic doctor with little experience of human nature.

It takes a long time, even for someone with a lot of natural empathy, to learn the art of consultation to the point where you are much less likely to run into trouble for saying the wrong thing and getting yourself in hot water because you didn’t cover your ass well enough. It’s a learning process like any other.

Obviously not all young doctors are bad and not all older doctors are good, but there’s certainly more likelihood of this kind of error early in a doctor’s career.

EarthStoodHardAsPrion · 29/12/2021 14:44

@lunar1

My 10 year old is having a surgery soon. His surgeon explained it to him, gave him a choice. He asked a few questions and decided to have a GA.

DH and I weren't asked our opinion. It's his body and his choice. He's a bright child and the doctor took the time to explain.

His medical history isn't his choice, but I damn well will give him every little bit of control he's able to have over his treatments.

This is absolutely fine, because you are fine with it and accepted the doctor had explained the relative risks and you felt your son was capable of making that decision.

Had you disagreed, would you expect the doctor to ask your opinion, then ignore the fact that you disagreed, without explaining why they were doing so?

Had they gone against your wishes, and something went wrong with the anaesthetic, would you be perfectly happy they hadn’t lister explained?

ChateauxNeufDePoop · 29/12/2021 15:28

@putthatdown

DD had a local - she wasn't hysterical, writhing in pain or in any way distressed. She was fine. Because our NHS Drs are able to remove moles in their sleep! The mole was on the back of her neck and was unsightly as it was one that had multiple growths on it. I had expected the Dr to listen and to take my view into account. It was the fact that it was a minor op that made me also so concerned that general would be on the table...I dont feel that there has been any public debate around this and I dont agree that children are in a position to make decisions like this. The Dr ignored my wishes - and this I find strange. I also find it strange that so little infornation was given to my DD - it was impossible for her to make a choice when presented with so little information

The Dr ignored my wishes

And?

Porfre · 29/12/2021 21:49

@putthatdown

DD had a local - she wasn't hysterical, writhing in pain or in any way distressed. She was fine. Because our NHS Drs are able to remove moles in their sleep! The mole was on the back of her neck and was unsightly as it was one that had multiple growths on it. I had expected the Dr to listen and to take my view into account. It was the fact that it was a minor op that made me also so concerned that general would be on the table...I dont feel that there has been any public debate around this and I dont agree that children are in a position to make decisions like this. The Dr ignored my wishes - and this I find strange. I also find it strange that so little infornation was given to my DD - it was impossible for her to make a choice when presented with so little information

Ok. So if you've got such strong views on this the person to talk to was the doctor and ask them what their reasoning was.

Vapeyvapevape · 29/12/2021 22:00

So if you've got such strong views on this the person to talk to was the doctor and ask them what their reasoning was

Exactly, did you just sit there like a lemon , silently seething inside ? All sounds a bit odd .

solvendie · 29/12/2021 22:31

Perhaps the doctor was assessing whether she could cope with local rather than giving a choice per se?