Current situation; my reception aged daughter has told her father that she keeps it a secret he does not live with us.
He has decided that he must collect her from school and meet her friends..even organise a party 🤔
Ok so here's the full story now.
Dd was conceived by IVF via a known donor (her "father")
He played no part in the pregnancy, bought no baby equipment, never came to scans or the birth. Met her for the first time when she was 8 weeks old. Apparently too busy to come sooner.
In her 4.5 years has only recently spent any significant solo time getting to know her (more forced by me) as he moans that he knows nothing about her, yet never calls to check in.
There has been so much of me trying to tell him what he needs to do to be a proper father, for example a regular day) night that is consistent and my daughter will feel settled and secure with. But this is just not possible as he's too busy (his words)
I have raised, worked, dealt with all the mental exhaustion, the financial expenses and even solo with no breaks during all the lockdowns.
He has had no interest during the nursery years, never once suggested picking up or meeting friends.
I don't even know where he lives.
But now he wants to swoop in and play the hero dad, I feel extremely uneasy about it.
I don't want her to begin to rely on his presence, when he could disappear again for 6 months it just feels wrong.
DD is a very happy, confident and secure child.
He is making out like I am unreasonable and even told DD that he thinks I don't like him.
(I don't think much of him, however I would never put that on my DD)
I'm too close to the situation and can't see if I'm unreasonable or not.
So ladies honest opinions please.