To think I'm doing something wrong

[Rosebel]

I really like the nursery my son is at and he generally seems to enjoy it too but I think I'm doing something wrong.
I try to appear friendly when picking my son up and on occasions when he's had accidents I'm pretty relaxed as I know kids fall over and things.
At the moment we have a support worker as my son's development is delayed. With our consent they also talk to the nursery. Nursery tell the support worker strange things like his car seat is too small for him (it actually isn't although he will be soon) and seem reluctant to talk about anything to me at pick up time.
He's supposed to be under the care of the Senco too but we've never spoken to her. They aren't doing face to face meetings but I think they could call us or talk to us at pick up time.
Am I doing something wrong? Or is it normal for nurseries to be wary about discussing anything with parents?

Anyone?

Do you ask? Set up time to speak to them?asked the senco worker to have a meeting?

I have asked for a meeting and they said they weren't doing face to face meetings and on the phone things can be misinterpreted. I pick up at lunch time and Senco is always on her lunch then.
I don't even want an in depth conversation just an outline of what they're doing so I can try the same approach at home. Obviously I'm doing things with him at home but thought a joint approach would work better.

You need to assert yourself a bit more. Insist on a phone or video call to discuss progress, targets and a joint approach.
Unfortunately, as most parents of children with any additional needs will tell you, you have to get pushy to advocate for your child.

I think a good idea would be to put your concerns in writing and I would address it to the nursery manager. It’s very difficult to know exactly what’s going on but it doesn’t sound like you’ve been confrontational or there are any safeguarding concerns so they should absolutely be discussing any issues with you as well as the support worker. There’s always a good chance the car seat comment could have been a flippant remark rather than them bringing up a serious concern though. It sounds as if you might be a bit worried that they’re almost talking about you(?) and I’m sure that’s not the case but you shouldn’t be finding the information out second hand. The senco being on their lunch break is NOT an acceptable reason for them not to meet with you. Is there anyone that can come along to a meeting with you for extra support (a friend or grandparent?) It sounds like you are always polite and friendly but you can still do this while pushing for your child’s needs to be met as pp suggests. It is vital that you are all being given the same information! Good luck

I’m sure they could organise a zoom meeting also even if they are not doing face to face?

Thanks for the replies. I will ask again and be firmer. I think I'm always aware of being "that parent ".
I used to work in nurseries but it was a long time ago and wasn't sure if things had changed., especially due to Covid.
Nursery is shut this week but I will talk to them next week when he goes back.