Just take a PCR FFS!!

[KeyLimeFly]

We’re at PIL for Xmas. MIL had mild cold symptoms (so I thought) midweek. The kids have both had colds and she looked after them the weekend previously so I was happy to assume it was that seeing as she’d had negative LFTs and pretty much the same symptoms as the children had. However, she’s now been in bed for four days. She still won’t take a fucking PCR. It’s driving me a bit mad. I work with vulnerable people, it’s actually pretty important that I know whether she has it. I must’ve said 10 times ‘you need to take a PCR’. She keeps saying she needs to call the doctors and won’t listen to me that the first thing they’ll do is get her to take a test.

AIBU to be pretty cheesed off now?

You can’t control what other people do sadly. The only thing in your control is what you do. So frustrating as it is I’d suggest you and your family taking PCR tests.

My PILs were ill with cold symptoms recently. When I asked them if they were taking LFTs, they laughed and said no, they'd call the doctor first.
They later said they'd got antibiotics and were fine.
They never entertained tests of any kind.

I have a vouole of other relatives in their 70s like this who insist it's "just a cold" and laugh at suggestions of tests.

Take a PCR yourself. I'm so tired of covid meaning everyone is expected to bow down to other people's wishes - take some responsibility.

You can't make her take a PCR test. I know so many people with it at then moment, including all 3 of my adult children. Close contact and positive lat flows. No one's taking PCRs. All are behaving responsibly with regard to contact with others. If you need to know then then get yourself tested.

Definitely should before wasting a doctors time. That’s the bit that would drive me more insane.

But what good is her taking a PCR going to do now? If you are concerned you have it then you need to take a test?

If shes been ill enough to be in bed for 4 days i doubt you nagging her about a test is helpful. If you wanted to you could offer to order her a home PCR, and collect and post it.

Given your kids had colds when she was looking after them, and is consistently negative on LFTs, isn't it more likely she's caught something from them?

Has she been boosted?

I would go home and book PCR tests on the way, assuming she has someone to look after her.

She should test but she won’t.

I would go home to avoid whatever it is she has and then test yourself and the kids as if you have been close contacts

If your MIL and kids both had the same symptoms, only hers has worsened to being in bed - surely it's a consideration that your kids had covid and you've been exposed to it anyway?

Your right the doctor will say take a pcr test so I’d just leave her to it . I know what you mean it’s like some people are determined that they haven’t got it even with symptoms just take a test .

@amylou8

You can't make her take a PCR test. I know so many people with it at then moment, including all 3 of my adult children. Close contact and positive lat flows. No one's taking PCRs. All are behaving responsibly with regard to contact with others. If you need to know then then get yourself tested.

Agreed. The majority of people I know with it, tested positive on LFT and started isolating based on that. PCRs are not always easy to get within a reasonable distance. Due to Xmas postal issues, those ordered on last weekend 18th/19th) still not arrived and isolation has ended for one family.

Our surgery is seriously fed up of the amount of people that phone up for antibiotics for a chest infection who say “but it’s not Covid, my LFT was negative”. Why people can’t grasp that LFT can give false negatives is beyond me. It’s very frustrating.
Although…

If you usually have a cough, it may be worse than usual. You should get tested in the first 3 days of symptoms appearing, although testing is effective until day 5. You won't normally be tested after day 5 unless it's for a specific reason. This will be agreed on a case-by-case basis

The majority of people I know with it, tested positive on LFT and started isolating based on that

Whereas I know people that have never had positive on LFT but were positive on PCR.

Just order a postal PCR test for her. Then she can take it at home and not have to leave her bed.
Book drive through PCR tests for you and your children if you think that you are contacts of a positive case. Then you will have the results before you go back to work.

@WrinklesShminkles

Take a PCR yourself. I'm so tired of covid meaning everyone is expected to bow down to other people's wishes - take some responsibility.

This logic is... twisted. You're sick of people asking people to take responsibility for their own actions so they should take some responsibility? Can you hear yourself?

Why are you still there? I'd go home and book yourselves a PCR. You say your kids had a 'mild cold' I literally see so many people using these words which I think is code for 'covid symptoms' you should have got your kids tested too really.

Unpopular opinion. If we all stop with the incessant testing madness, life will get back to normal a whole lot quicker.

What difference does it make if shes positive or negative - you and your kids need to test and why weren't they tested anyway sounds like whatever shes got came from them!

Just act as if she might have it i.e. do a lateral flow every day and be alert for symptoms.

Btw I currently have it and have had worse colds. So if you didn’t test your kids when they had cold symptoms yabu judging her!

You should have tested your own kids.

It’s ok for you to assume it’s “just a cold” but not your MIL. Ok then.

Test yourself? People are unbelievable. I was around relatives who were coughing and sneezing all Christmas and then went from ours to a bigger family gathering of 14 people this morning without any mention of taking lfts. I'll test myself over the next few days.

@WrinklesShminkles

Take a PCR yourself. I'm so tired of covid meaning everyone is expected to bow down to other people's wishes - take some responsibility.

OP doesn’t have symptoms (?) so technically she would have to pay for a PCR, her MIL would get it for free.

@CornishGem1975

Unpopular opinion. If we all stop with the incessant testing madness, life will get back to normal a whole lot quicker.

I guess you don't have vulnerable family members or work with vulnerable people then. How utterly selfish.