Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Colleague texting about work on Boxing Day

116 replies

Grandmotherschina · 26/12/2021 19:12

They do not celebrate Christmas (Muslim)

Received a text message this morning “Dear X, don’t feel you have to respond immediately but I need to know if X/Y/Z have been sorted. Can you also let me know what is happening with A/B/C, thanks Y”

  1. I was on annual leave last week so I don’t have any up to date info about the above
  2. Colleague has major form for messaging at weekends/evenings etc and expecting a reply
  3. It’s Boxing Day ffs

Aibu to message back and say “just because you’ve said I don’t have to respond immediately does not make this ok”!

OP posts:
user7473769969 · 26/12/2021 20:16

What’s their religion got to do with anything if they have a form for it? Shit stirring

DaisyNGO · 26/12/2021 20:17

@Grandmotherschina

Personal phone. Text message.

They are clinical, I am operational. Neither of us are working today

So they regularly text your personal phone about work?

Def one to sort in the New Year. Ignore till you are back at work.

DirtyDancing · 26/12/2021 20:18

Do not respond. Then speak to them about it when you return from leave and tell them it is not to happen again. Follow it up in writing via email documenting it for future reference.

FriendshipsAreHardForMe · 26/12/2021 20:19

Do you feel able to have a chat with them on your return about this given its a regular thing.

"Hey colleague, I know you prefaced your message by saying you didn't need an immediate response but by texting me you put me in work mode and I thought about your message for a while when I should have been relaxing. In the future can you please try not to message me on my annual leave unless it's an absolute emergency."

If they do it again, maybe speak to your manager? Everyone deserves down time.

LittleMousewithcloggson · 26/12/2021 20:19

YABU
It’s a text message. You’re an adult and can make decisions. Just make the decision to ignore it until you are back at work. It only intrudes into your life if you let it get to you.

user7473769969 · 26/12/2021 20:20

@LittleMousewithcloggson

YABU It’s a text message. You’re an adult and can make decisions. Just make the decision to ignore it until you are back at work. It only intrudes into your life if you let it get to you.
Agreed!
sonjadog · 26/12/2021 20:20

I sometimes get messages from colleagues out of hours. I am an academic and many of my colleagues have no concept of office hours. Unless it is really urgent, I wait until it is office hours to answer. I would like to say that they have taken the hint, but no, not really.

ElectraBlue · 26/12/2021 20:21

Ignore them. You are on leave.

Also why do they have your personal phone and feel it is OK to contact you on it for random, non-urgent work queries?

When you are back at work I would reply by saying something in the line of 'I am back at work and will now be able to deal with your query. I noticed that you contacted me on my personal phone. Please note that this number should not be used for work queries, especially when I am on annual leave'.

tribpot · 26/12/2021 20:25

It sounds like you use iMessage with your personal contacts, so can't just put the app in a 'timeout' to stop the messages being visible (this is what I'm doing at the moment with Outlook, I've set a screentime limit of 1m per day, when I get up and do my teeth I deliberately leave it open so by the time I get back it's timed out for the day).

Can you delete the message and then block the person, at least until you're back at work? And possibly permanently - there's surely no legit reason they need to iMessage you on a personal phone. I'd imagine your organisation would prefer company comms to be done on official channels like email so it's backed up etc.

starfishofbethlehem · 26/12/2021 20:25

As others have said I it's a work phone then turn it off until you are back in work.

If its a personal phone I'd be sending a " do not use this number for work matters or you will be blocked" reply. And then I'd do it!!

GlendaSugarbeanIsJudgingYou · 26/12/2021 20:27

The beauty of a text message is that you can respond whenever you like. You didn't even have to read it.

You really should have just ignored it for now and said nothing.

MrsSkylerWhite · 26/12/2021 20:28

Turn your phone off.

WeRTheOnesWeHaveBeenWaitingFor · 26/12/2021 20:30

It’s all very well to say don’t respond but it’s ruined your peace and made you start to worry about work things. I’d be tempted to either get a work phone or say absolutely no messages from work and tell people to email instead.

minny80 · 26/12/2021 20:32

I wound ignore till I am back to work, and when replying ask not to be messaged when on holiday in a polite but assertive way.

negomi90 · 26/12/2021 20:33

I texted a work colleague today personal phone to personal phone. We're both supposed to be working tomorrow, I'm waiting a PCR result and incredibly unlikely to be working tomorrow. I sent her a heads up and a grovelling apology. Didn't want her to be surprised in the morning.
I don't expect any form of response.
I've also spoken to my boss today (who is in work today and tomorrow).

rrhuth · 26/12/2021 20:36

This would get them a serious bollocking at my work, it is not considered OK to contact people via personal numbers unless a genuine work emergency.

The best thing to do is to just ignore them I think. There must surely be some way to block them? I would do that going forwards.

2bazookas · 26/12/2021 20:37

Just don't respond.

Starcup · 26/12/2021 20:37

IGNORE!

minny80 · 26/12/2021 20:38

@negomi90 that's a very different reasons to get in touch with work colleagues. I am a manager and, before going on holiday I gave my personal number to someone who's just joined the business. They messaged me to let me know about developing covid symptoms and I replied to provide support/reassurance. Then a couple of days after to the messaged me to let me know someone was looking for me on slack. I replied just the let her know I'll deal with this in January.

CoffeeRunner · 26/12/2021 20:39

Have you ever messaged this colleague during their non work days?

3scape · 26/12/2021 20:41

If this not a work provided contact then utterly ignore the message. If your colleague is going outside of work communications log it. But don't respond or even acknowledge it.

steelrose · 26/12/2021 20:42

I would respond
"I am on annual leave until (xx date) and will respond to your query when I return. Please do no respond to this message."

MrsSkylerWhite · 26/12/2021 20:43

steelrose

I would respond
"I am on annual leave until (xx date) and will respond to your query when I return. Please do no respond to this message."

Just right. Not offensive but crystal clear.

JuergenSchwarzwald · 26/12/2021 20:48

I can see both sides of this. On the one hand it's fine to email a work email address any time and say you don't expect a reply at eg 3am.

But if it goes to a personal phone/email etc you see it out of hours and it starts to take up headspace. That's not ok.

rwalker · 26/12/2021 20:51

I really don't understand the issue unless they want a response today .

Deal with it when your back at work .