To really struggle with my MIL

[LondonOx]

My MIL is difficult at the best of times - she has an unfortunate habit of making things as difficult as possible and then getting incredibly stressed by the fact that she has overcommitted herself.

Christmas Day this year has no different, normally I try and let it wash over me, but this year she promised our help to do three chores on Christmas Day (driving to pick someone up, drop someone off and delivering Christmas dinner to someone) and then didn’t even get my partner a Christmas present. I feel so annoyed on my partners behalf, particularly as her siblings both received relatively expensive gifts.

AIBU to be really annoyed, even though it was my partner not me that didn’t receive a gift? Any advice on how to let it go?

Why let it go? Why not start saying "no" to her? And making much less effort with her generally?

Dammed if I'd just carry on as normal if someone treated my dh like shit.

Just make less effort with her, she’s told you were you are in her list of priorities and it’s quite low down. Just because someone is related to you it doesn’t mean you have to put up with them and their garbage.

Same thing here. Partner got no gift, didn't get one at his birthday either but his brother and his child got quite a bit spent on them even though we do a hell of a lot more for her than his brother has ever done!
DH wants to let it go but it's really hurt him and it's made me quite upset.

Just do less for your MIL going forwards. Don't rely on her.