Showering

[autieok]

Hi we have two adult dd one lives at home other comes home regularly. They both have bf who stop over at ours. They have a bathroom they share which has a bath with shower attachment. We have a small ensuite with an old shower, it's desperately in need of replacing- rubber seal peeling off, not draining properly. We are saving to do this. Because it doesn't drain well and my husband has a lot of hair it constantly has hair on the floor which looks like sludge 🤢. Dh showers every day but leaves for work immediately so it's usually me that cleans it for me to use (or I have a bath) Both dd use their bathroom but their boyfriends prefer to shower so ask to use our en-suite. I find this a grief as it's usually in middle of ds bedtime or late at night. I don't want them going into a unclean shower but I don't want to have to clean it on demand. Dh says let the dd clean it but I feel this is unfair caus it's not her that's used it. I just think they should use the shower attachment in dd bathroom. Plus I don't really want them walking through our bedroom. Aibu?

@TraceyLacey

Have you done a good few doses of drain unblocker?

Yeah it requires a plumber I think

DH definitely needs to clean it. He's disgusting.

@MrsCat1

Your DH needs to clean up after himself. It's basic courtesy to leave the shower clean.

This. Also, if there IS a shower in DD’s bathroom (albeit an attachment), why would they want or need to use yours anyway?

DH can have a shower, and then whilst it's draining he can get dressed, eat breakfast etc etc and come back up to clean it just before he leaves.

The not draining properly is a maintenance issue rather than a repair/replacement issue;it sounds like your pipes are blocked under the shower;if your DH leaves that much hair in the shower the pipes are probably full of it.

You need a drain rod;this is what I use

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B08PPJXRYX/ref=cmswwrcppapiglttfabcD8N53CKERN4FJENE95J1??encoding=UTF8&psc=1

And then some drain granules to use once a week to keep the drains clear however I'd get a plug hole draining cover too to catch the hair.

And lastly tell your DH to clear up after himself in the bathroom.

You've two issues there.
One your DH needs to rinse his own hairs and tidy the area.
The second is the boyfriends, say no I wouldn't like them using my ensuite, tough shit if they prefer a shower, it is your private area and disturbing the younger DC.
I like a bath but I don't own one so I manage.

@N4ish

So the men get to demand how and where they shower and you’re expected to get up early to clean and allow people to tramp through your bedroom?! No way, you’re being a pushover here.

This 100% ^ I would absolutely see my arse about the comment about DD cleaning up DH’s sludge. This completely grim (not envy). Why the hell should the women clean up his pubes, hair and used shower suds. He should be ashamed he even suggested that as an option. DH needs to clean up after himself, it will take 30 seconds to squirt the shower floor with Jif and shower it off.

Firstly, whoever uses the shower or bath - cleans up afterwards.
It’s not for the next person to clean up before they get in.

Secondly, I wouldn’t want anyone using my en-suite, especially not a guest. Surely that’s the whole point of an en-suite!
Tell your DDs that their boyfriends don’t be able to use it as it’s broken.

@thenewduchessoflapland thank you hun will look at it 😊

@Cheerbear24 thank you I will definitely say that to him next time he suggests it

That’s disgusting, I sure he could find a time to clean it. Can’t believe he suggested you or his daughters do it, what’s wrong with him, that’s so grim.

Bleurgh I would definitely get the drain unblocked so you aren't cleaning DH hair sludge. Agree the boyfriends can use the girls bath.

You need to use Mr Muscle drain unblocker or one of the ones where you put the whole bottle down then leave it for ages/use hot water. Then get a proper hair catcher that doesn't float up. I use one and it makes a massive difference. Directly after showering remove the hair from the hair catcher, place it in a small piece of toilet roll and put it in the bin. Rinse off the hair catcher so any shampoo, conditioner or residue is off it. You need to do this each time.

You may find this actually solves the issue without needing a plumber. I know if I don't use mine the shower becomes unusable as it will not drain. Shower pipes can be narrow and block easily. You cannot have all of that stuff going down a shower pipe. It will block again, even if you get a new shower.

He is being revolting leaving that there for someone else to stand in. It's really horrible. And as for 'DH says let the daughters clean it'?! That's shocking as it's nothing to do with them. What would he do if you didn't clean it? I'd stop cleaning it...

If you don't want them walking through your bedroom that is that. Ensuites are personal and really just for the people whose bedroom is attached to it IMO.

Does he work late hours, is he not there in the evening to clean it when the boyfriends want to use it?

If so then he must leave for work later so he should just shower twenty mins earlier then clean it

Get him told.

Say no to the bf. Parental ensuites are out of bounds.

Try snaking the drain. I had hair halfway down my back and a very sluggish shower. I removed enough slimy hair for a sorority. No, I don’t have a picture. Cleaning the drain was very satisfying.

Your en-suite is private, like your bedroom, tell them to use the other bathroom.

If that’s too awkward can you convert the shower attachment into a stand up shower with curtain?

I'm a bit on the fence actually. Yes, it is your ensuite, but it also sounds like this is your only proper shower. I used to have a bath with attachment, and I have to say that I'd be hoping I could use the ensuite. I think some posters think it is a normal showerhead that hangs over the bath? It isn't, it's more like a small handheld attachment you could do a sponge bath with, but it would be a major pain to try and properly clean yourself using that, especially if there's no shower curtain. I don't think you or your DD should be bending over to clean, but I can see why the boyfriends prefer an actual shower. I would too.

Tbh hair or not I wouldn't want them to be using my ensuite!

Jesus tell the boyfriends to go and shower at home, no way would i have them trudging through my bedroom . And your dh needs to sort out your ensuite pronto, and clean up after himself in the meantime.

@Midnightpharma

I'm a bit on the fence actually. Yes, it is your ensuite, but it also sounds like this is your only proper shower. I used to have a bath with attachment, and I have to say that I'd be hoping I could use the ensuite. I think some posters think it is a normal showerhead that hangs over the bath? It isn't, it's more like a small handheld attachment you could do a sponge bath with, but it would be a major pain to try and properly clean yourself using that, especially if there's no shower curtain. I don't think you or your DD should be bending over to clean, but I can see why the boyfriends prefer an actual shower. I would too.

You are correct 😊 I'm going to get a shower curtain and call it a shower tho 😂

We have a similar problem in our shower when hair has built up.
The HG hair unblocker is amazing! And then we have silver plug drainers which doesn't float as quite heavy (not heavy enough to stop the cat running around with them in his mouth though!). This keeps it all in check.

I still wouldn't want anyone using my personal space though

Man A's manfilth could cause disgust and inconvenience to man B and man C. Is it woman A, B, or C's job to clean out the filth?

They can use the bath with shower attachment. It won't kill them!

Run a couple of kettles down your shower, it shouldn't take that long to drain. Or you can get long spring things you put down to grab onto clods of yick.

@GrendelsGrandma

Man A's manfilth could cause disgust and inconvenience to man B and man C. Is it woman A, B, or C's job to clean out the filth?

They can use the bath with shower attachment. It won't kill them!

Run a couple of kettles down your shower, it shouldn't take that long to drain. Or you can get long spring things you put down to grab onto clods of yick.

You've suggested the women shouldn't be responsible for cleaning up then told OP how to deal with it?